The Fourteen-Character Courage of Long-distance Love: The first thing you need in long-distance love is courage, the courage to challenge reality, the courage to take any risks, and the courage to face failure calmly. . We must understand that reality is a powerful and invisible force. We cannot predict what will happen, but we can use the courage to contend with this force, and we can also use the courage to accept the result of failure. Loyalty: Being in a different place without the company of a lover can easily lead to a kind of psychological loneliness, and this loneliness will arouse inner longings and desires. Only absolute loyalty can resist the temptation from the colorful world. Loyalty is not "stupid", it is respect for feelings and respect for oneself; loyalty is not "infatuation", it is the refinement of a noble personality; loyalty is not "dumb", it is a kind of morality and a kind of responsibility. Trust: Long-distance relationships give the other person a space for daydreams, but at the same time, they also make the other person feel insecure and cause random suspicions about the other person. Love is often slowly eliminated in these suspicions. Therefore, trust is the embodiment of mutual respect and equality between lovers, and building a bridge of trust is the most effective way to consolidate a long-distance relationship. And love that lacks trust will only become vulnerable to mutual suspicion. Understanding is based on trust. Without trust, there is no way to understand. Don’t get angry because one party is busy at work or entangled with other things and fails to contact you in time. You must know that the pressure of reality will not make everyone live an easy life, so try your best. Control your emotions, learn to understand each other, be considerate of each other's hard work, and be each other's spiritual support. In this way, understanding will also become a regulator for the relationship between the two to heat up. Communication In addition to the distance caused by time and space in long-distance relationships, the psychological distance cannot be ignored. Communication is the best way to maintain feelings and shorten the distance. Improper communication can turn distance into an obstacle, while proper communication can turn distance into a motivation. Therefore, communication is both an art and a science. Goal: A long-distance relationship should lock in a goal and should not fend for itself. In fact, the ultimate goal of a long-distance relationship is to create the same conditions for life, because people who love each other cannot live in two beautiful but unreachable environments. Lotuses will eventually grow in the same soil. Since we love each other, we must stay together. No matter what, you should strive for it with all your strength. Patience: Long-distance relationships require more waiting than days of companionship, so two people must endure loneliness, endure the cold without hugs, and endure the anxiety of only counting down the time every day. But you must know that a long-distance relationship is a race against time. If you persist, you will win. If you are defeated by time, you will miss that person for the rest of your life. So you must persevere and persevere in the long-distance love marathon. As long as you can finish the race, you don’t need to get a ranking, you will win! [Edit this paragraph] Principles and experiences of long-distance relationships No.1 Long-distance relationships are not suitable for people who lack the necessary writing skills to express their passionate emotions. No. 2 Men who just want to get physical feelings are best not to get involved. Desire can easily destroy long-distance relationships. No.3 Long-distance relationships require more financial investment: long-distance phone and Internet charges, travel expenses when meeting, etc. No.4 This is the most important thing: the man should have experience and be able to coax the woman, and use words to make her feel the loving love surrounding her. No.5 The conditions between each other should not be too different, otherwise there will not be enough communication to eliminate the feeling of instability. No.6 Men must have confidence and women must be patient. No.7 In a long-distance relationship, don’t talk about rights. Because you love her, you only have obligations to her; because you love her, you only have tolerance for him. First of all, this code is only for men and women who take relationships seriously. For bold women and playboys, please give up your unrealistic fantasies. General rule: long-distance love means the pain of lovesickness, infinite care and waiting, and also a great trust in her and belief in this love.
Therefore, people who do not believe in love should not choose, people who do not love deeply should not choose, people with weak will should not choose, people who have been liberated by the modern avant-garde on sexual issues should not choose, and the few remaining people who believe in love should not choose. He is very deep-rooted, traditional and strong-willed. Here are some suggestions for long-distance relationships: Article 1: Make good use of the short message function of your mobile phone and send him a message as soon as you are fine without affecting his work and study. Think of him, and secondly, he will feel your presence immediately. Even if he has any thoughts or is doing something that may damage the relationship between you, he will restrain himself. And if you have ever had the experience of eating or taking a walk with a person but he keeps sending text messages, you can understand how uncomfortable this is for the other person, even if there is someone next to you who has evil intentions and intends to poach you, seeing this kind of How can the scene be so warm that it is temporarily gone. Of course, he may be on mute mode. If he doesn't reply after sending many messages, then make a direct call after confirming that he should be fine, and say what everyone knows. In short, mobile phones are a good thing. Article 2: Regardless of men or women, except for old lovers, accidents cannot happen during the day, but always at night. So remember to send a text message saying good night every day to make sure he slept where he should. If the management is more strict, you are not allowed to go out alone with the opposite sex at night. If you have something to say hello first, even if you go out, don’t forget to remind him to go back to the dormitory late. Be lenient when it is necessary, be strict when it is necessary, and it’s okay if you don’t listen. Make a fuss, tell him what he does, and you will do the same. Compare your feelings to each other, everyone has a conscience. Article 3: If he is in the same city as his old lover, be more tolerant. Make sure that he can openly explain his normal interactions with his old lover in front of you. Even if you are angry, don't say it. This is a bit aggrieved, but if he doesn't say anything to you, the situation will only get worse. You must know that you are not by his side after all, and if you try to pull this unbreakable thread inexplicably, it will only become more and more messy. In the end, you will hurt others and yourself. Instead, you will ruin your love and push him to his old lover. Generally speaking, not many people go back. Chatting with old lovers is just because of the past, so everyone can talk more openly and happily. Of course, there is a limit to everything. Once you have passed it, you still have to pull him back. Noisy is the best way to pull him back. I think everyone has some experience in making noise, but again, there is a limit to everything, and you can control it yourself. . Article 4: Love needs to be spoken. No matter how long we talk, love always remembers to say it. This is how the passion of an old couple is cultivated. Regardless of whether they are men or women, no matter how many times they hear it, they will always be very happy when they hear the three words "I love you". You can't usually see long-distance relationships, let alone talk about it. How will he know that you love her if you don't talk about it. Article 5: Be considerate of yourself in everything, and do what you want others to do first. Article 6: Maintain a certain frequency of meetings, preferably once every few months. The pain of lovesickness also needs to be released. A few days of sweetness can make up for the lovesickness of the past few months. Article 7: If two people are aboveboard, it is best to always take the initiative to tell each other what they are doing and where they are. In this way, both parties will have peace of mind. And if you form a habit in this way, the possibility of being poached will be greatly reduced. Article 8: If you love him, you must trust him. After all, they are in a different place, so it is impossible to see his words and deeds every day. Mo Ming's suspicion will ruin the sweetness between the two of them. Article 9: In everything you do, you must first consider the bottom line to prevent yourself from being caught off guard when encountering sudden changes. Things must always be done in a good direction, but you must be prepared for the bad. Article 12: Long-distance relationships are most afraid of anger and misunderstanding. If anger and misunderstanding persist for a long time, poachers will take advantage of the situation. Make everything clear. After all, you must be rational. If you should admit your mistakes, admit them. Of course, if you really can’t If people are willing to bow their heads, boys please don't give priority to women at this time. We should take the initiative where we should. [Edit this paragraph] Real problems and solutions to long-distance relationships Regarding separation between two places, German sociologist Norbert Schneider said that more than 60% of couples living apart complained that the geographical distance harmed their love. 40% of people blame the other person for leaving too little time for themselves. Separated partnerships end on average after four years, while normal partnerships last on average at least five years.
But nearly a quarter of people have a different view: they believe that only a partnership in which they live separately can satisfy them without boring their partner. Psychological counselor Hu Shenzhi said that data show that living apart in two places ranks fourth among the reasons for divorce. However, he believes that separation between the two places is not the main reason for divorce, it only accelerates or delays the end of the marriage. 1. There are indeed some unavoidable practical problems when living apart in two places: 1. Unable to relieve the loneliness. No matter how fast the Internet speed is, how high the pixels are, and how cheap the phone bill is, it is only a feeling of seeing, hearing, and touching. At the critical moment, when he is not around, the sense of loss can only be felt by lonely people. Both partners have no one to rely on. They are usually busy at work and may not have time to take into account this feeling. However, on weekends and holidays, they often don't want to go home. If you are sick or frustrated at work, the feeling of helplessness will be even stronger. Being on the road for a long time, placing your feelings on the phone and communicating, and having to face life alone when you need the other person, may make both parties physically and mentally exhausted, thereby exacerbating this sense of loneliness. 2. Feelings fade over time, and there are fewer topics to talk about. Lili in Beijing feels more and more that her husband Gao Liang, who is far away in Dubai, is slowly fading out of her life circle. When they met once a year, Lili found that she rarely thought of Gao Liang. The topics they talked about on the phone day after day were nothing more than how her daughter was doing, what happened in the workplace, and the two of them were the same friends. That’s all. The lover becomes the most familiar stranger. 3. It is difficult to get along physically and mentally, and one party may cheat. Sex life is also an integral part of a happy marriage. The long-term separation between husband and wife artificially blocks the satisfaction of instinctive desires, and the inner balance of marriage is broken. And when the lover is not around, once the moral restraint is relaxed, extramarital affairs are very likely to occur. 2. Run towards happiness. When the two places are separated, the difficulty is not the distance in space, but the distance in heart. How to bring the soul closer to make up for the distance in space? Don’t hesitate to invest, make frequent calls, and work hard to create romance. Be familiar with using QQ and MSN, master the latest network knowledge, and actively share happiness, sweetness, sadness, and concern with your partner, so that the speed of technological development can keep up with changes in relationships. An unexpected love letter, a gift from thousands of choices on an anniversary, a sudden appearance without an agreement, appearing in front of the other person when he needs it most, can make love last forever. Develop your own hobbies. For example, exercising, going shopping, watching movies, traveling, and reading books can, firstly, distract the feelings of missing each other, and secondly, when two people meet, they can also have new topics to talk about. Make good use of family and friends. When you are in a bad mood, remember to call a friend to talk to you. When you need help, ask your family or neighbors for help. It is better than working alone. Learn to think differently and have a grateful heart. Most long-distance lovers can bear the pain of missing each other - sometimes it's almost sweet. What they can't bear is the asymmetry in time and space. For example, if you call him in the rain, but no one answers, or you say "hello" and then say: "Call back tomorrow, I'm socializing now!" If you don't get an immediate response to an email, this means Suspicion arose on the side. At this time, you should think more about the other person: Is there something wrong with him? Maybe he is really busy with work. LUCY, who studied alone in Beijing for three years, has always been grateful for this time and has always thought about her husband's kindness. She said: "Except for your parents, no one in the world has a reason to be nice to you. Thinking about it like this, my husband has been so kind to me. , I kept it in my heart, and seeing how cute the other person was, the relationship between the two of them was naturally much better." [
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