The Importance of Women's Spiritual Independence

We often tell a woman that she must have her own job, be able to support herself and be financially independent, so that she can have more say in her emotional life and more choices in her life. That's true. In fact, in China today, most girls are working hard, and there are many female elites in all walks of life. "Women hold up half the sky" is really true. Almost everyone belongs to the category of economic independence, but not everyone can be happy. And spiritual independence is the fundamental guarantee of women's happiness. 0 1 Qin Jie is the deputy general manager of a large company. In the workplace, she is highly effective and helps the company get some big orders. She is a strong woman to the core. However, she suddenly resigned. Later, I ran into her once and found that she was not as radiant as when she was in the original workplace. She looked haggard and depressed. It turned out that her husband cheated her, saying that she couldn't stand a strong woman like Qin Jie. In order to protect her family, Qin Jie resolutely resigned, but her husband still did not repent. After days of torture, Qin Jie lost sleep. You see, people like Qin Jie are already independent women on the whole, but her independence only stays at the material level, and spiritual independence will also limit her choices. She is still struggling in the whirlpool of emotional pain. A woman with independent spirit can correctly understand the situation and make rational choices, and will not panic and panic when encountering things. She has an untouchable bottom line and an inviolable principle. But sister Qin didn't. Her husband cheated her. She should have divorced decisively and stopped her loss in time. But she actually chose to resign and stay. It was obviously her husband's fault, but she took it on her own. She felt that she didn't care enough about her family and her husband. Xiaoyu also has a well-paid job. She is beautiful, has a good figure and is loyal to her friends. We all say that a girl like her will be very happy. However, contrary to expectations, Xiaoyu's several loves ended in discord. It turns out that Xiaoyu has many unreasonable demands on boys when she is in love. For example, when she needs it, boys must drop everything and come to her at once. Whether you are working or making good friends, you will be rejected. Her phone must be answered at the first time, and WeChat must be answered at the first time, otherwise she doesn't love her. At first, boys thought she was cute and clingy, but after a long time, no one could stand it. A woman with independent spirit can control her emotions better and will not regard love as more important than anything else. She won't send her joys and sorrows to other people's every move. She won't ask boys if they love her all day, and she won't need all kinds of proofs from boys all day, and she doesn't have to make such a comparison: "Which is more important, me, work or your friend?" If Xiaoyu had known this earlier, I'm afraid he would have been extremely happy. Xiaoling is an independent person. When Xiaoling gave birth to her second child, she quit her job and became a full-time mother. Husband works in other places, and everything at home depends on Xiaoling alone. I've heard other mothers always complain about the hard work of raising children, but I look at Xiaoling's circle of friends and I seem to enjoy it. I was curious and asked Xiaoling the secret. Xiaoling said that it was her own choice to resign and take care of her children. Being a full-time mother is hard, but after all, time is much more free than going to work. You can use a lot of fragmented time to learn what you like, such as learning financial management, fashion design, writing and so on. Life is full. When the children are older, you can open an online shop, even if you want to return to the workplace, you can easily get it. Although Xiaoling's husband is in a different place, Xiaoling has never been worried that this will affect their feelings. She has never complained or been anxious. She said, what is there to worry about? Worrying can't make you live a happier life. A woman who is independent in spirit, strong in heart, confident and stable, can calmly cope with the years, will not lose her way in the long river of time, will not complain about life, and will not suffer from loss. So, what can be done to achieve spiritual independence? 1. Be able to think independently, judge independently, know what you want, have a clear life goal, not live blindly, not love blindly. Don't be confused by some chicken soup articles, compare them one by one all day. A man loves your performance, guessing whether he loves me or not, you are not good to me at all ... what should he do if he loves you or not? As long as you know how to love yourself, you will know what kind of love is right for you. 2. I have my own hobbies and know how to entertain myself. I can be a full-time wife, but I can't be a "nanny" full-time wife. 3. Love learning, love reading, and strive for progress. If you want to be a spiritually independent person, you must constantly enrich your spiritual world, love learning, be willing to accept new things and master new skills; I like reading, increase my knowledge reserve and enrich my thinking angle; Strive for progress and have the ability to meet their spiritual needs. 4, avoid misunderstanding, spiritual independence does not mean self-righteousness, does not mean refusing love, does not mean turning a blind eye to the love of others, does not mean not coquetry, does not mean not loving others. On the contrary, a woman with independent spirit knows how to love others, how to manage feelings and how to taste life. Su Cen said: "Independence is not a woman declaring war on a man, but just self-esteem." Bi Shumin said, "I like grateful women who travel alone. They know how to thank their parents, but they don't follow blindly. They know how to thank heaven and earth, but they don't love themselves. They know how to thank their friends, but they don't depend on them. They know how to thank every seed and every breeze, and they also know how to get up early to sow and travel against the wind. " Because I am spiritually independent, whether I am single or married, I always know my happiness. We advocate economic independence, but spiritual independence will make you live more freely. The importance of women's spiritual independence 2 0 1 There are two friends who happen to be a couple. I remember when I first got together, it was boring for two people to be together all day. Every time I meet them, I always see that they are bored and envious of others. Half a year later, when I was chatting with that female friend, I overheard her say that her relationship with her boyfriend seemed to have changed, and he didn't love himself as much as when he first started together. Sometimes I don't answer the phone or reply to text messages, even at home, I just do my own thing. She doesn't want to go shopping with her, either reading newspapers or playing games. She even wondered if he had changed his mind and stopped loving himself. It happens that there is a project in the company that has business dealings with boys' companies. After a docking project was completed, he bought me a cup of coffee. When chatting, I casually chatted about his relationship. I wanted to persuade him to pay more attention to my female friend, otherwise it would always make her feel insecure. But the boy said, it's not that I don't love her, nor that I'm indifferent to this relationship. But when I am with her, I always feel tired. No matter what she does, she always wants me to accompany her. Even if she has a meal, even if she goes out to play and needs to go to the toilet, she will keep me in front of the toilet. Even if she goes downstairs and throws a garbage, she wants me to accompany her ... I said, it's nothing. Many girls in love are like this, which shows that she cares about you very much and wants to experience everything with you. The boy said, this is just a part of our life. She will call you at work for no reason, because she saw a joke when she was painting Weibo. She will call 20 times in ten minutes after you refuse to answer the phone in the meeting; She will force you to get up and go shopping with her when you are exhausted; Besides, in life, you can't make any decisions. Make up your mind even if you buy apples and pears. When eating, I want to send a WeChat to ask if you want to drink corn sparerib soup or kelp sparerib soup ... The tired expression on the boy's face reminds me of the cheerful appearance when they first got together. In fact, many people will say, why are these acceptable when you are in love, but after a long time, they become the reason for mutual criticism? Obviously, I don't, but I'm tired of it, right? What I want to say is that it is precisely because many people think so that they confuse passionate love with life after being dull. When you are in love, there is no defect in the other person, and all the places are shining; But life is not, but daily chores are not. When you are polished by life and your feelings are getting dull, many problems that you can't find in love are revealed at this moment. It is not that feelings have changed, but that life itself is like this. As a girl with independent thoughts, you should understand that every couple can't live in love forever, and eventually they will lead a dull, simple and stable life. At this time, we should leave some room for each other to survive. Each of us is an independent individual, and we will not combine two people because of love, so everyone should have their own time and space. At this time, excessive dependence will push a relationship further and further. Each of us, whether living alone or with the people we love, needs spiritual independence first. We support each other and snuggle up to each other, but we grow up independently. The so-called spiritual independence means having your own independent opinions, independent thoughts, independent space and time, accompanied by your own ideals and ambitions, and your own career. Because you rely too much on your own thoughts, you will tie your own thoughts firmly to the other person's thinking mode, think about what the other person should think, and even follow the other person's thinking mode Once you can't keep up, you will have a state of separation and affect your feelings. Because I rely too much on thought, I have no independent taste in life, no aesthetic taste, no ideal life, no dreams and ambitions. It's like your soul is attached to the other person, and you are just a shadow of the other person. The other person has to bear his own life and these additions you impose. How can he not feel tired? How can he not want to escape? If you really love someone, you don't want to keep the same hobbies or even the same ideals with him. As long as we keep a consistent pace of progress and maintain a consistent mental outlook. Not to rely on him for a lifetime, but to feel that he is everything to you and your spiritual sustenance. Spiritual independence, you should have your own hobbies, your own ideals and hopes, your own independent ideas, your own unique insights, your own career, your own exclusive time and space. Two people snuggle up to each other to keep warm, but they spur each other to grow up. Meet the sister of a famous writer. Her husband is the vice president of a listed company and is worth a lot. But even so, my sister has never been independent in money, life and spirit. Her writing is clear and clear, and her views are distinct; Her life is full of capable shadows. She has her own independent studio. Husband is busy at work, but she often walks around the country, watching different scenery and listening to different stories. When she has time, she will go to concerts and vent her emotions with a group of children. Looking at her circle of friends, you will feel that you were full of vigorous blood when you were young, and you will feel that you have followed her rhythm and traveled all over the famous mountains and rivers, seeing the warmth and warmth of human feelings. Most importantly, even though her life with her husband seems to be far apart. But the affection between them is enviable. Men often show love and say that their wives are smart, beautiful, independent and gentle; When she was chatting with us, her eyes were full of admiration when she talked about her husband. She said that he was wise, calm and cheerful, which satisfied all her fantasies about her lover. She often tells us that there is no so-called romantic affection between two people; More importantly, both of them have their own lives and their own considerations about the future. They do not interfere with each other and do not invade each other. But for this family, for the future of this relationship, all the ideas can happen to coincide. When a woman can be completely independent in thought and spirit, she will be in an equal state in a family, whether emotionally or in life. Because only in this way, you and your other half are like two evenly matched people, not each other's accessories or decorations. Many of us, when talking about marriage, always deliberately understand what kind of role a woman's other half is. Once this person has bright clothes and a successful career, he is regarded as a so-called good family; And once this person is mediocre and similar to everyone, he laments the so-called marriage. In my opinion, the most important thing in a relationship is not how rich and successful the other person is, but how much happiness and happiness he can give you. Of course, this joy and happiness must be accompanied by the equality of marriage, and the equality of marriage is the equality of emotion, spirit and status in this family. So, in my eyes, you can see what kind of role a woman's other half is. But if a woman wants to think well, it really depends not only on the other person, but on what kind of state you can live. If you want to live as you please in a short life, then spiritual independence may be the most important factor. Only when you are spiritually independent can you be economically independent and truly independent of anyone.