One. ? Danger signs of suicide
Suicide is a sign! Most people who want to commit suicide will have warning signs to some extent before committing suicide. When you find that someone around you has the following phenomena, he may be in a crisis of suicide. Liu Mingbo of Fudan University summarized the dangerous symptoms of suicide as "three branches and three changes".
"three kinds of trust"
1. Trustee: suddenly ask, inquire or entrust relatives and friends to strengthen their concern for someone;
2. Entrustment: suddenly requesting or entrusting one's own major matters to perform or complete on his behalf;
3. Consignment: suddenly package important items or pets around you, and ask or entrust them to keep or keep them on their behalf.
(B) "Three transformations"
1. Great changes in speech
I started talking about suicide or thinking about death, expressing my thoughts about death to close people, or showing them in diaries and paintings.
(1) Talk about despair, helplessness or worthlessness, and start saying "I wish I were not here" or "I'm leaving". Express death-related information or commit suicide through conversation or writing.
(2) It is possible to tell people directly: I want to die; I don't want to live; It's too painful to live ...
(3) or indirectly tell people that all my problems will soon be over; No one can help me now; Without me, they would be better off; My life is meaningless; I will be free soon. ...
2. Great changes in behavior
(1) began to disappear, began to haunt people, and suddenly changed from bad to good or vice versa;
(2) self-mutilation, frequent accidents, engaging in high-risk activities, consulting suicide methods, and collecting medicines;
(3) starting or aggravating alcoholism and drug abuse, and suddenly starting to eat less or eat more;
(4) Spend all your money in various ways (including all donations or gifts, such as giving away your precious things, sorting out things to be thrown away, packing things for no reason, thanking people or saying goodbye, and returning borrowed things), and arrange things in an orderly way. ...
3. Great change in temperament
(1) Sudden and obvious behavior change (interruption of communication with others): abnormal expression, sudden and unexpected change from sadness to calmness, and even a happy look;
(2) Extroverts suddenly become introverted, while introverts suddenly become extroverted, cautious and careless;
(3) People who talk less suddenly talk more, and people who talk more suddenly talk less;
(4) Severe depression: deep sadness, decreased interest, loss of appetite, silence, insomnia, etc.
According to Wang Dengfeng's research, the change of students' mood and behavior is an important sign of possible suicide. In particular, students' depression and retreat, the obvious reduction of self-evaluation, the change of personal hygiene habits (dirty), accompanied by the obvious loss of interest in learning, often live alone at home and do not attend classes. This kind of pain is often told to others, and most students who are going to commit suicide will leave a will.
Two. Risk assessment of suicide crisis
(A) Evaluation factors (8)
1. Severe depression
2. Have a history of attempted suicide.
3. The intensity of acute stress is very high.
4. Low quality of life
5. Chronic psychological stress
6. I just encountered a serious interpersonal conflict.
7. People related by blood committed suicide.
8. A friend or acquaintance committed suicide.
(2) Judgment criteria
Only 1 is the risk factor, and the possibility of suicide is extremely small;
There are 2-3 risk factors, and 30% may die of suicide;
96% people with six or more risk factors died of suicide.
(3) When it is suspected that suicide may occur, it is necessary to evaluate the parties as follows:
1. Current mental state and thoughts on death and suicide;
2. Current suicide plan: how the parties intend to commit suicide and when they intend to take action;
3. The support system of the parties, to understand their family status, whether there are friends to support.
Three. Brief suicide crisis intervention plan (QPR)
QPR is
Problem (problem)
Persuade (persuade)
Ask for help.
QPR is not a special tool for mental health professionals, nor is it psychological counseling or psychotherapy; QPR can help people in trouble to rekindle their hopes through positive actions.
Usually ask a question and save a life.
(1) Asking
1, when to ask:
It is important to consider the following questions when asking questions.
1) After establishing a good relationship. If there is no good relationship, the other party may not honestly express their inner pain and suicidal thoughts;
2) When the customer thinks you can understand him;
3) When the parties freely express their feelings;
4) when the parties talk about negative emotions such as loneliness and helplessness.
2. How do you ask
Questions should be asked in a sympathetic and caring way.
An indirect question:
You know, when people are depressed or confused, they may wish they were dead. I don't know if everyone feels the same way.
2) Have you ever thought about sleeping till you never wake up?
Ask questions directly:
1) You look really depressed recently. Sometimes, when people are in your situation, they will feel desperate. I wonder if you've ever thought about ending your life?
2) I'm worried about you. I don't know if you've ever thought about suicide.
3) Are you considering suicide?
And further ask:
1) Do you have a definite suicide plan: Have you figured out how to implement your plan?
2) Did you choose the suicide method: Did you prepare suicide tools such as pills, guns and drugs? You mean you're ready, right?
3) Have you chosen the time to commit suicide? You decide when to end your life; When are you going to take action? ?
Don't ask that.
1) "You don't want to commit suicide, do you?"
2) "You're not stupid enough to come up with such a bad idea, are you?"
3) "Suicide is a very stupid behavior. You won't do that, will you? "
Asking this question means that you can't understand their inner feelings, but it will hinder effective communication.
4. What not to do when you know that the other person has suicidal thoughts:
1) insufficient understanding of the seriousness of the situation;
2) Showing shock, embarrassment and panic;
3) Empty preaching;
4) Stimulate the parties to accelerate suicide;
5) think that the problems of the parties are insignificant;
6) making false promises;
7) Promise to keep secret what the other party wants to commit suicide;
8) Leave customers alone.
After learning that the other party has suicidal thoughts, further persuasion is needed.
(2) Persuade
The first step of persuasion is listening. Listening is the beginning of establishing a good trust relationship between two people, and it is also the key to persuading people to continue living. What people in psychological crisis need most urgently is someone who can listen to his message.
1. Listen
1) Pay close attention to each other and listen carefully to his troubles. You can start with "I wonder what trouble you are in?" Start;
2) Don't interrupt him easily during the conversation;
3) Don't rush to judge, and don't reject or try to deny the "rationality" of any suicidal thoughts.
4) Avoid cliches and try to make people who try to commit suicide repent by "drinking a lot of wine". It is dangerous to openly discuss with people who try to commit suicide and persuade them to stop suicide, and I believe that such comments will make the other person understand their own problems and may lead to tragedy.
5) Keep calm and make the other person feel safe;
6) Don't rush to give a solution.
persuade
At this moment, people in crisis need firm and concrete guidance. Insist and tell each other repeatedly that suicide is not a good solution to the problem. We should empathize with each other, fully understand each other's difficulties, and help them firmly establish the belief that things can get better. Tell each other, "things are really difficult, but they are not hopeless."
It is very important to provide emotional support at this stage. The more openly you talk to your customer about loss, isolation and worthlessness, the lighter his emotional disorder will be. When the emotional disorder subsides, the parties may reflect. The process of reflection is very important. He may change his mind, from seeking death to surviving.
It should be pointed out that if the other party chooses to die, then such a decision is irreversible. As long as there is life, there is an opportunity to solve existing problems; Death also ends any chance of turning back. At the same time, it should be emphasized that the stage of depression will pass. Although depression is a kind of self-limitation, it also has its cycles. When the symptoms of depression reappear, people should also see that it will soon disappear. Through sincere conversation, discuss how to solve the problem, enhance your positive strength and give up the idea of suicide.
Most people who have suicidal thoughts actually want to find a way out!
(3) Ask for help
A person's strength is limited and needs backup help. We can invite others to help him and ask who else can help him: family, friends, brothers, sisters, teachers, doctors ... It is also important to seek the help of relevant professionals at the first time.
You can ask him, "Are you still embarrassed to let anyone know about you?
We can call him/her and ask him/her to always help you.
Would you like to go with me for help?
Do you want me to help you get help? "
And get the other party's promise: you promise not to hurt yourself until we find help, ok?
Tell each other: "I hope you are alive", or "I am by your side, let's overcome difficulties together and tide over difficulties together".
Care can save lives. People who commit suicide often think that they will not get help, so we should do more.
Don't leave him alone if you think he has a high risk of suicide. They should be monitored 24 hours a day. It is difficult, but we should try our best to do it.
At the same time, they should be accompanied to mental health service institutions or hospitals for evaluation and treatment immediately. People who have just committed suicide (such as taking poison, cutting their wrists, etc.) ) should be sent to the nearest emergency room immediately. Follow up afterwards to express your concern and support, and let them know that you care about them in any way that you feel comfortable and appropriate.
QPR concise scheme emphasizes:
1. Listening to and helping their wishes and behaviors can help those who have suicidal thoughts rekindle their hopes and change the situation!
2. A good relationship is a firewall to keep people who intend to commit suicide away from hopelessness.
3. The firm belief in positive results is an important reason for them to give up their "farewell" plan.
People who have suicidal thoughts often feel lonely and alienated. Please help them feel that you are by his side and that you are with him!
Of course, the best recommendation or introduction method is to introduce the other person directly to someone who can help him. The second is to get the other party's commitment to accept help, and then make specific arrangements to seek help.
Four. The main points of helping people with psychological crisis or suicidal tendency
1. You should know in advance that they may refuse your help. People with psychological crisis sometimes deny it, because it is difficult to admit that they can't handle their own problems.
2. Show them your concern. Ask them about the difficulties they face and the impact they face. Encourage them to talk to you or other trustworthy people.
3. Listen more and talk less. Give them some time to express their inner feelings and concerns. Don't make comments, and don't feel obligated to find some solutions.
4. Be patient. Don't give up just because they can't talk to you easily. Silence is allowed in conversation, and sometimes important information will appear after silence.
Don't worry about their strong emotional reaction. Emotional outbursts or crying will help them release their emotions. Stay calm. Accept, not judge. Don't try to persuade them to change their inner feelings.
6. Tell them the truth. If their words or actions scare you, tell them directly. If you are worried or don't know what to do, just tell them. Don't pretend to be okay or happy.
7. Ask them if they have suicidal thoughts. Don't be afraid to ask them if they are considering suicide. This will not let them commit suicide, but will save their lives. .
8. Believe what they say. Any signs of suicide should be taken seriously, no matter how they appear.
9. Don't promise to keep his suicidal thoughts secret.
10. If there is a risk of suicide, try to get help from others so as to share the responsibility of helping him with you.
1 1. Let them believe that others can help and encourage them to seek help and support from others. If you think they need psychological help, give them recommendation information.
12. If they are afraid or worried about seeking psychiatry, they should take the time to listen to their concerns, tell them that most people in this situation need professional help, and explain that you don't recommend them to see a professional because you don't care about their affairs.
13. If you think he has a high risk of immediate suicide, take immediate measures: Don't leave him alone? ; Remove dangerous articles for suicide, or move him to a safe place; Accompany him to a mental health institution for professional help.
14. If suicide has occurred, send it to the nearest emergency room immediately.
15. Give hope. Let them know that the difficulties they face can be changed.
16. At the end of the conversation, encourage them to discuss relevant issues with you again and let them know that you are willing to continue to help them.
Verb (abbreviation of verb) misunderstanding of suicide behavior
We often have inappropriate reactions to suicide, many of which stem from our misunderstanding of suicide. For example, we think that young people should not commit suicide because they have no major worries; Or this suicide must be mentally ill. The following will list some common misunderstandings, so that we can have a further understanding of suicide.
1, "Suicides are generally untraceable" or "It means that people who want to commit suicide generally don't commit suicide"
2. "The attempted suicide doesn't really want to die"
3. "People who are determined to commit suicide are determined to die."
4. "Suicide crisis is reduced after emotional improvement"
5. "Most people will never have the idea of suicide."
6. "A little thing is enough to make people want to die?"
7. "People who commit suicide don't need psychological intervention."
8. "Suicides are all mental illnesses."
9. "Don't talk about suicide with someone who is likely to commit suicide, otherwise it will promote his death."
What can we do with intransitive verbs?
For individuals, how can we solve problems not only through suicide?
(A) improve the ability to solve problems
Modern life changes rapidly, and it is not easy to adapt to so many changes. If we only know one-way thinking, it will be difficult to solve many problems we face. Therefore, we need to try to face problems from different angles, remain flexible, learn new problem-solving skills at any time, and improve our resilience and ability to adapt to external changes.
(B) learning methods of stress regulation
Appropriate pressure is the source of motivation for people's efforts, but when the pressure is too large and not handled properly, the individual's body and mind will be oppressed. Therefore, we need to pay attention to whether the pressure exceeds the load at any time, learn to relieve the pressure, and face the pressure events in more ways and attitudes, so that the pressure will not become the resistance to life growth.
(C) to develop the habit of positive thinking
Thinking about the same thing from different angles will bring completely different feelings. As the saying goes, "If Theon Of Smyrna loses his horse, it will be a blessing." If we always look at the events in life with positive thinking and optimism, we will be better able to face setbacks, keep hope in life and enjoy a happy life.
Establish a social support network
Everyone needs to share their feelings with others when they are depressed. Trust and intimacy in interpersonal relationships make us feel dependent in our hearts and will not easily lose hope in life. Therefore, there are people (such as relatives and friends) and social support resources around you at any time.
Of course, suicide prevention and intervention is a systematic project, which requires society, government, community and relevant organizations to establish a perfect three-level prevention mechanism. Only when the whole society cares for those lonely and sad souls floating in the world, provides warmth and help to those in trouble, and takes care of spiritual life and suicide intervention can we build a firewall to prevent suicide for the whole society.
Life is precious, as thin as a cicada. Respect life, care for life and save lives. All this is to make people feel warm and loving. We should convey the warmth, love and light in our hearts, so that more people's lives can have a bright sunshine. As Kant said, "When one life is in danger, another life will save it no matter what the result is-this is because of the dignity of life".