As the saying goes, "people are good at being bullied, and horses are good at being ridden." I don't agree with this view, but it conforms to the distortion of human nature. Kindness is neither pedantic nor stupid; Kindness is for kind people; For the jackal, of course, use the jackal's trick to deal with a man as he deals with you. To deal with the evil American imperialism, we should take up the weapons of sanctions and human rights, and let them taste the taste of sanctions and criticism, because sanctions are not the patent of the United States, and it is not only the United States that can pick up the stick of sanctions and wave it at will, but we can also, especially treat the enemy like a wolf!
The world is full of miracles; When the forest is big, there are all kinds of birds; Don't be ruined by a mouse excrement, and don't think that the world is a bad person just because you have been cheated. I believe there are still many good people in the world. Don't just see the dark side, don't look at the problem one-sidedly, and don't confine yourself to your own thinking and cognition. We should go out and have a look, and eventually you will find that there is true love in the world!
The secret "law of attraction" tells us that as long as we hold goodwill, we will attract goodwill; Evil also brings evil. Life will treat us as we treat life. If we are full of confidence in the future, the future will be full of confidence in us!
When we sincerely smile at others, I believe others will give you a happy smile in return!
Yijing: Tian Xingjian, a gentleman strives for self-improvement; The terrain is Kun, and the gentleman carries things with morality!
Wang Yangming's Biography tells us: Conscience, knowing and doing are one!
How do you treat others, others will treat you! Because life is a mirror, how others treat you is a true portrayal of yourself; Maybe we don't care much at ordinary times, or maybe we haven't realized it yet!
To love others is to love yourself; Convenient for others, convenient for yourself!
Give someone a rose, the hand has a lingering fragrance!
When we can't change reality, but we can change ourselves. When we are sincere, all we get is sadness, so we don't need to be sincere. If sincerity can't be exchanged for sincerity, we should be polite and hide its sincerity and goodwill. Netizens often feel that the reality is that people are not old and the world is cold. At this time, we still report sincerity and kindness regardless of good or bad, which is helping to bully the weak and blaspheme honesty and kindness. So be kind and sincere, and choose the right person. Those who suffer from severe cold will appreciate our warmth, and those who are hungry will appreciate our food. However, when people are full of fish, if we ask for help again, we will only be looked down upon. If the road ahead is full of thorns, we can't hold our heads high and choose to slow down and move forward cautiously. If the stone gets in the way, we will still stride forward and fall and get hurt. We don't have to struggle when lies are flying everywhere. We should learn to adapt to the current situation and avoid its sharpness. It's really a heart-to-heart exchange. It's our fault, we didn't look at the object, we didn't have a choice. It is our own fault that makes us cry, and it is our own fault that makes us feel hurt. I don't know if the above words can make you shake hands with confidence!
"People's hearts can't be exchanged for people's hearts", "People are bullied" and "dogs bite Lv Dongbin, but they don't know how to be kind" ... These wonderful experiences have not been rewarded, and even the dilemma of being run on, ignored and crushed by people often occurs because of your kindness, so some people say, "Kindness should be measured, sharp and divided! Can't just give it! " These are vivid lessons and profound summaries in reality, which should be taken as a warning.
When "people's hearts can't be exchanged, and many times your kindness has become the handle of others holding you", how to deal with it?
Before answering, I want to emphasize that some people's kindness comes entirely from his (her) nature, and there is also a kind of kindness. Besides nature, it is an inner accomplishment and accomplishment cultivated the day after tomorrow! No matter what kind of "kindness", it is not for equal exchange, nor for fame and fortune!
Their kindness only comes from their own hearts or their own conscience, as long as they are innocent. So even if it is not understood and treated well, it will not change its original intention.
This alone partially answers this question.
My answer to the subject's question is: "Break up!"
I have had a similar experience more than once.
In fact, it is still divided into objects. When this happens, the other party is often an acquaintance we often contact, closely related or mixed together!
First, between relatives and friends. "Kindness" has been taken as a handle and held by others. If I am a family member and a very good friend, I may be willing to give up once! Just once! Maybe without hesitation, just refuse! Of course, this relationship later fell to freezing point …
My character hates such people the most! First of all, my kindness is that I value each other and think she (he) is worth it! Or out of the affection that blood is thicker than water, the feedback from the other side is tantamount to giving me a blow! Resentment can be imagined!
In the future, I will no longer have more contact with them or recognize each other's personality, and gradually alienate them. Even if we don't break up, we will no longer regard each other as friends.
Relatives can't break off the relationship, but I will tell each other my bottom line intentionally or unintentionally, so that they feel that her (his) behavior has hurt my heart. I will not treat her (him) as before, so that she will no longer have the opportunity to easily breed paranoia and greed.
Second, between colleagues. Colleagues are often the most familiar strangers, strangers and even enemies!
Therefore, the relationship between colleagues is also very delicate and needs to be careful. Of course, it does not rule out that they are close and interact well.
The problem of topic is also very common in the workplace, and it is often fatal! The reason may be that you are too credulous or deceived by the other person's same appearance, so it is easy for you to talk to him and let him know more secrets, personality and family affairs …
Once there is a conflict of interest between them, or the other party is jealous just because you are better than her (him), you will be thrown a killer! Completely out of your guard and expectation, the blow to you is fatal! At this time, you are often unable to resist, and you can only knock out your teeth and swallow them in your stomach! Call yourself stupid, confused and blind! Learn your lesson, snack ...
This is often the case for newcomers to the workplace.
Generally, good people often don't retaliate against others once or twice, but only choose to endure it silently, and then drift away from them and draw a clear line! Be more careful in future interpersonal communication, and never dare to talk to people easily …
Third, between lovers. Such a thing happens between lovers, or one party doesn't really love each other at all, but the other party is infatuated; Either the original feelings have passed away, the breakup is over, and one party does not accept it, or it is to retaliate against the other party.
Such a situation is often difficult to "give up". If one party is still reluctant to go, and the emotion is still there, it is conceivable that it will be abused willingly, and even led by the nose by the other party again and again ... At this time, it is not only the kindness in our nature, but also the emotional entanglement and reluctance! Only when it comes to the end, when it is black and blue and completely desperate, will it give up.
Generally, after this, the road of feelings in the future is also difficult, and even the feelings between the two sexes are discouraged, and they no longer believe and pay easily!
What I want to say is that kindness is not weakness and indecision! Let go when it is time to let go, and give up when it is time to give up! Long pain is better than short pain!
But there are really bad people in reality: no matter how others treat them, they silently endure, don't fight, get hurt again and again, as always, even if they see each other's thoughts clearly, they choose to be stupid!
This is close to the Buddhist system! I can only admire them! Because she (he) is practicing in the world of mortals and has to cross each other and wait for each other's consciousness to get lost? ! Hehe, I can't do it anyway, although I claim to be kind!
The above three aspects are just my humble opinions and opinions, and there must be many shortcomings and biases. Welcome friends who have read this article to express their views and communicate with each other.