It seems that the second child era has really arrived, and there are more and more good-hearted people around us. The words to persuade them to have a second child are often on their lips. Do you feel familiar with the following three sentences?
while my in-laws are young,
someone will help take care of my second child, so forget it after giving birth!
when my friend was pregnant with her second child, she told me that while my in-laws were young, someone would help take care of the second child, so forget it. At that time, I couldn't help worrying about her, because when I gave birth to Linlin, my husband also blew in my ear like this. However, when the child was born, he didn't have to take care of himself.
In other words, both parents have worked hard for most of their lives. Do they have to spend their later years with their grandchildren? They should also have their own old age, even if they don't take care of our children, it is reasonable. Children belong to both husband and wife, so how can the obligation of raising be easily shirked?
If having a second child is only for you to realize the wish of the whole family, and the task of raising children is entrusted to the elderly, then think about regeneration! My friend's second child has been born, but her father-in-law has fallen ill, and her mother-in-law has no time to be busy. She has to quit her job and take care of her second child, and she has to pick up the boss who is still in kindergarten.
As the second child is still breast-feeding, she complained to me that after putting the boss to bed every night, she had to get up and nurse the second child after midnight, and the lack of sleep every day made her physically and mentally exhausted. I asked the child's father, and the more she said it, the more wronged she became. The child's father was still like a child, like an abacus, and he couldn't move it. Sometimes he even felt that he had raised three babies.
It takes three to five years for the eldest brother and the second child to be brought up together.
You will be relieved if you go to kindergarten!
I never thought that the parenting task after giving birth to a second child was simple: 1+1=2. As far as I know, most second-born mothers not only have to take care of each child's daily life, but also deal with their relationship, and some even have to deal with the relationship between their father and their children. How hard can it be?
some people may say that children will have a hard time for a few years when they are young, and it will be fine if they all go to kindergarten. When I was learning to drive, I knew an elder sister, the eldest of whom had gone to college, and the second of whom was in junior high school. She said that she had brought up two older children by herself. The boss took him to primary school, the second child was born, and he took the second child to kindergarten for three years. He stayed at home full-time for ten years before he could go out to work. Ten years, how many decades do we women have?
Even if you have two children in three years, send both children to kindergarten within five years. Do you think it's really easy to send children to kindergarten? In kindergarten, children are most likely to get sick. In a family of two children, one child will usually catch a cold and infect the other child. It is inevitable that the child will catch a cold, have a fever and cough, but as a parent, have you forgotten the anxiety and anxiety?
hope, hope, is the child liberated when he goes to primary school? Please, it's not easy for parents of primary school students now. It's all parents' business to check their children's homework after school. Don't tell me that you raise children. There will be a lot of social competition in the future. How can we not do a good job in the basic education of children? Don't shirk your parents' responsibilities.
Two or three children were born in my parents' generation.
Aren't they all brought up as well?
During my years in Guangdong, I have met many families with many brothers and sisters, ranging from two or three to four or five. Most of their fathers had the idea of having more children and more happiness, which should be related to the nurturing culture of our country. However, as for what they are brought up with, or how they live, they can only push it off with "children and grandchildren have their own children and grandchildren".
Although having more than one child is not the patent of the rich, as far as the current society is concerned, economic conditions have become the core factor for having a second child. It is necessary to know that having children is not such a simple matter as sowing and producing. The cost of raising children is increasing day by day, and how to calculate the cost of educating children?
If the quality of life of parents declines due to having a second child, which hinders the realization of personal value, think twice before you do! After all, there are not only children in life, but also many valuable things worth pursuing and realizing. Moreover, times have changed, so don't take the parenting concept of parents' generation as an example.
In the final analysis, whether to have a second child or not is your own business, so you should listen to your heart. If you really like children, and have the courage and physical strength to fight more and more bravely, then take action. If not, just think about it.
don't blindly follow, do what you can, and don't expect the responsibility of raising the elderly. Unless you love them, they should have their own choice of life in their later years.
if you want to have a second child, you will raise it happily;
No, it is enough to raise a child with all one's strength.
Don't pin your future on children.
In the process of raising children,
The happiness we have gained is the greatest blessing.
the author of this article, Linlin Ma, founded the WeChat account "Mama Zhizao" (ID: mama zhizao 1).
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