Huidong consulting recruitment information

"Can we be friends in life? I wish I had a friend like you. Be a friend. " Many people who ask for help want to be good friends with counselors, that is, they can keep friends outside of counseling, such as friends in real life. Having a counselor as a friend feels that their problems are all right. Therefore, I really hope to get emotional establishment outside the consulting relationship and hope to get permanent friendship. This wish is good, but it is often rejected by psychological counselors. The counselor has established a professional relationship with the helper from the beginning, that is to say, it is only a professional relationship, and the counseling relationship is over. Many people don't quite understand, and think that psychological counselors are too lofty and professional. Do you really think so? Why does psychological counseling emphasize professional relationship and have emotional restrictions on counseling relationship, but it can't develop personal feelings? This has certain scientific significance. Let's discuss this problem below. First, psychological counselors are ordinary people with their own troubles and puzzles. Psychological counselors themselves will have their own contradictions and puzzles in real life. Everyone has a sad and hard life behind his own window, and so does a psychological counselor. As a psychological counselor, you need to constantly adjust your psychological state, inner contradictions and conflicts, and maintain inner harmony and peace, so as to better face the seekers with a positive attitude and better provide psychological professional help. Every counselor inside and outside the consulting room needs to keep his psychological balance, constantly surpass himself and constantly improve himself. Only by maintaining a good attitude, stable mood, keen psychological insight and understanding ability can we give the best psychological help to those who ask for help within a predetermined time. Second, no one is perfect, and psychological counselors also have their own advantages and disadvantages. From one end of the world to the other, we can't find perfection. Psychological counselor also has her shortcomings, such as personality, life, family, growth experience and so on. It is not that a consultant is the embodiment of wisdom and a perfect individual. A consultant is a real member of ordinary life and has his real real life. Consulting indoors and outdoors, he has his own unique life. Above two points, once the counselor and the counselor become friends in life, the counselor's state and life will bring hints and influences to the seeker. The unintentional words and random cognitive concepts of psychological counselors may hurt the help seekers. The psychological counselor outside the consultation room is his own outside the profession, casual and life-oriented. When spiritual communication is amplified into real life, consultation becomes disease-free chatting and moaning. Thirdly, expanding the consulting relationship to outdoor development will make the psychological counselors lose their neutral attitude. Psychological counselors require to maintain a neutral attitude in order to have an objective view and understanding of the problems of help seekers. When you get close to a counselor, he loses his meaning to you, and he can't look at your problem from an objective standpoint. Because you are friends with him, he cares about you very much, so he is easily involved and attacked by your emotions, and will eventually fall into mental and physical exhaustion with you. I really can't help you. Psychological counselors maintain a neutral attitude of non-evaluation. You can flow freely like water and be as transparent as glass. When you complain about others, you need not worry about being criticized. When you talk about yourself, you won't feel unsafe ... in this fair and neutral consultation, you will have new horizons, give you new experiences and feel the new world. One more layer of relationship means more emotional involvement, and it is difficult to be neutral. Therefore, the simpler the relationship with the counselor, the better the effect of psychological counseling will be. Fourthly, counselors need to protect themselves. In the consulting room, there is a harmonious and trusting relationship between the consultant and the helper. When you leave the consulting room, this relationship disappears immediately, and the consultant will soon forget you (self-protection). In every consultation period, psychological counselors will be highly focused, will intervene in the world of help seekers, and listen to countless pains and tears every day. After leaving the consulting room, the psychological counselor should quickly forget the negative emotions of the visitors in the consultation, return to his real life, forget the unhappiness, forget the pain, and let the psychological counselor maintain physical and mental health and maintain a positive attitude to meet tomorrow's work. If you are a friend of a counselor, after all, your emotions are contagious. Your pain will always infect the counselor, and the counselor will lose his life. He will lose the direction and road with you in your painful night, which will make both sides mentally exhausted. He will lose patience with your questions, feel unable to bear the mental load, and eventually lose the role of psychological counselor. Fifth, being friends with psychological counselors is not conducive to the independent growth of help seekers. Help-seekers become friends with counselors. If you have any questions, contact him at any time, ask him for advice and rely on him, and you will lose the ability of the helper to solve and face the problems independently. Will form a dependence on psychological counselors, will push the problems of help seekers to psychological counselors, seize the straw of life, do not want to work hard, do not want to pay. This is not conducive to the perfection and independent growth of the helper's personality. Sixth, avoid empathy for psychological counselors. Empathy can be divided into positive empathy and negative empathy in psychology. Positive empathy: Psychological counselors are the best listeners and the best voices in the world. In this process of psychological assistance, it is easy for seekers to transfer the love lost in their lives to psychological counselors, for example, through psychological counseling, seeking and compensating maternal love or fatherly love, seeking or attaching to lovers. Once these feelings are transferred to the psychological counselor, they will have pity or dependence, which means the termination and termination of the counseling relationship and the failure of counseling. Referral must be considered. This is also a very taboo and defensive thing for every psychological counselor in his long-term work. I fell in love with my counselor. Once I have empathy, I must end the consultation and stop the consultation. Negative empathy: transfer real life or hatred and hatred from childhood to psychological counselor. It is of scientific significance to maintain the professional relationship in psychological counseling. So when you like to associate with a counselor, a mature counselor will let you choose: "You can't have your cake and eat it."