Honesty is the foundation of a person's life, just like "people can stand without faith, and countries can be strong without faith." If a person wants to gain the trust of others, he must try to keep his word. If a country wants to be strong, it must regard honesty as the fundamental principle of its founding.
Honesty is very important to people and countries. Then, for marriage, honesty is also a very important consideration.
Be honest before marriage, and you can spend the rest of your life together after marriage. Honesty is especially important for men. When a woman decides to give the happiness of her life to a boy, if the man's integrity is questionable, then this marriage is doomed to be unhappy.
Talking about marriage is an important milestone in marriage. If a man really wants to get married, he will negotiate with his beloved woman according to his actual situation and try his best to meet her requirements.
However, if a man cheats a woman in order to marry her home, he first pretends to agree to her demands in good faith. But after I promised, I found various reasons to refuse, saying that I could not meet this and that requirement, and in turn blamed the woman for her ignorance and incomprehension. In this case, it will not only lead to emotional crisis, but even lead to divorce.
In fact, the root of the problem lies in the man's integrity, so there will be a series of subsequent troubles. Just like a lie, it takes countless lies to be round.
To tell the truth, marriage obtained by deception is actually meaningless. Because there is no honest marriage, it is impossible to stand in real life. Marriage is like a house, and honesty is the foundation of the house. There is something wrong with the foundation, so the house can't stand the wind and rain of real life.
02
Ronaldinho and Xiaoyao, couples who have just been married for a month, have problems with their integrity. Their marriage, which was supposed to be a newlywed, turned into a romance. Not only did they not have the joy of getting married, but they almost divorced.
Ronaldinho, 28, comes from an ordinary working-class family. I have been in love with Xiaoyao for two years and am going to get married. When we are in love, everyone is very kind and loving. However, when they started talking about marriage, they began to have various contradictions.
Love is a wonderful time full of fantasy and self-release. At that time, it seemed that everything could be done and said. But when you really want to get married, it's like returning from heaven to earth and starting to really face all kinds of trivial things in real life.
Marriage is closer to reality than love. When two people want to get married, they need to sit down and discuss together: how to do the wedding, how to give the gift money, how to decorate the house and so on.
When Ronaldinho and Xiaoyao formally enter the topic of marriage, the first thing to talk about is the issue of gift money. Although Xiao Yao is an only child, her parents are more open-minded. They feel that as long as their daughter can be happy after marriage, they have not specifically proposed how much gift money they want, and how much sincerity the man's family has, they can take it out.
At first, Ronaldinho and Xiaoyao promised to give her a bride price of 200,000 yuan. However, when the bride price was really needed, Ronaldinho proposed such a condition. He said: "If your wife's family is willing to pay for the wedding ring, our family is willing to pay 200 thousand as a bride price."
But Xiao Yao didn't agree. She thinks the ring is a very sacred object, which represents a man's lifelong commitment to a woman. Of course, the ring should be bought by the man's family. How does the woman's family buy herself a wedding ring?
Ronaldinho had no choice but to promise Xiaoyao to buy a ring. But at the same time, he didn't make the promised gift of 200,000 yuan to Xiaoyao, which made Xiaoyao very uncomfortable. However, at that time, the two had already received a marriage certificate, and there was nothing to be angry about. They can only continue to organize weddings.
03
Xiaoyao is a girl with a romantic complex. She expects her wedding to be unique and wants to regard it as the best memory of her life. When Xiaoyao suggested how to plan the wedding, Ronaldinho agreed without hesitation. He also said that as long as Xiao Yao wants her marriage wish, she will help her realize it.
However, when the details of the wedding planning were formally entered, Ronaldinho began to give various reasons, saying that Xiaoyao's wedding requirements were too high to meet her requirements.
For example, Xiao Yao wants to change the first wedding car into a black one, and the wedding company also said that it can be changed. But Ronaldinho said that the black wedding car is not suitable for marriage, because black is an unlucky color. No matter what Xiao Yao said, he refused to change the wedding car into black.
But the truth of the matter is that the wedding company told Ronaldinho that it is ok to change the wedding car, but it will cost more money. At that time, most of Ronaldinho's money was basically invested in the wedding, and there was no extra money to change the wedding car. So, Ronaldinho made an excuse, saying it was unlucky, and refused Xiaoyao's request for a wedding car. However, Ronaldinho did not tell Xiaoyao this fact.
Xiaoyao is looking forward to the wedding, and Ronaldinho has given her many beautiful promises. But when it really goes on, it is very annoying. But Xiao Yao can only be forced to accept these unpleasantness. After all, he is already a licensee.
After getting married, Xiao Yao proposed to use the wedding money to travel abroad and relax. Unexpectedly, Ronaldinho refused directly. He thinks that if two people spend their honeymoon, they can just find a scenic spot in China, and there is no need to go abroad so far and spend a lot of money on vacation.
After rejecting Xiaoyao's request to go abroad, Ronaldinho proposed that the money for marriage should be used as the pension money for parents. Xiaoyao was puzzled and asked, "Why should I give my parents the money for my marriage?" We can take care of their future pension! "
Ronaldinho said: "In fact, the money we got married was given by our parents with their own pension money. Houses, gifts and weddings are all parents' money. Giving them money is also for their future security, and it will also reduce our burden. Why can't you understand? "
At the same time, Ronaldinho also told Xiaoyao that the ring money she bought at that time was actually bought by swiping a credit card. Since two people are married, they should pay back the money together.
Xiaoyao heard Ronaldinho's words and finally couldn't bear it. He got angry on the spot and said, "That's enough! None of the conditions you promised me before marriage came true. Now you are a liar when you tell me that you want me to pay you back the money you owe! Let's divorce! "
Hearing the word divorce, Ronaldinho realized the seriousness of the problem. He doesn't agree to divorce, but his relationship with Xiaoyao has already gone wrong. Although he temporarily retained Xiao Yao, who was going to divorce. However, if Ronaldinho still doesn't realize that there is a problem with his integrity, their marriage is doomed to be short-lived.
04
From the story, we can basically judge that Ronaldinho is a "unscrupulous" person to get married. He has three characteristics: bullying, cheating and cheating. Judging from the three things: gift money, wedding and ring, it seems to paint a beautiful picture for Xiaoyao on the surface. But when it was really implemented, it was because of his own face, and then he took the means of concealment and deception. In the end, the paper couldn't hold the fire, and these lies of Ronaldinho were discovered by Xiaoyao.
If all the beautiful pictures before marriage are piled up by lies, it is only an illusion of self-deception. When the masks of these lies are torn off, marriage life will be full of all kinds of distrust, and contradictions and quarrels will become common scenes in marriage, which is terrible.
At the beginning of marriage, the two newlyweds liked Ronaldinho and Xiaoyao. At first, Xiaoyao didn't trust Ronaldinho, so in the future, Xiaoyao would have doubts about Ronaldinho and their feelings. How can such a marriage last?
No matter what a person does, he should do it according to his own actual situation. If you can't reach your ability, lower your requirements and do your best.
As a man, it is his responsibility to give his woman a good marriage. However, everything about this wedding, including banquet, gift money, house and so on. , should be within my ability. In short, what kind of wedding you have is how much money you have.
If a man does something deceptive for an unrealistic wedding. No matter how grand the wedding is, it is of little significance. When the wedding is over, the high debt and the guilt of cheating will make the two people in the marriage live a very painful life.
The wedding is a matter for two people. The best way is for men and women to be honest with each other and do everything in a measured way. Only in this way can the wedding be meaningful.