Just as life needs running-in, so does career. Although they are husband and wife, there is no shortage of running-in places. If you are not careful, you will lose everything in your family and career.
"I think there should be clear rewards and punishments for doing business, one is one and the other is two; And he thinks that we should leave some room for people and things, and don't care too much. Just for this, we quarreled almost every day in the early days of our business. " Xiao Liu recalled that this "horrible" memory still lingers. She said: "We live in harmony. If it weren't for entrepreneurship, we wouldn't have so many contradictions at all. " After marriage, Xiao Liu and her husband resigned from state-owned enterprises and started an architectural design company together. They are the same age. After starting the company, they often quarrel over trifles.
"For example, I think people outside should be invited to deal with the problem; But he insisted that his younger brother be a driver, saying that his family was more trustworthy; I knew at a glance that I couldn't make money, so I suggested not taking it, but he felt that the company had just started and had to take it if it didn't make money. In short, the experience of starting a business with * * * is like a lamp, illuminating all our incompatible places! We are on the verge of divorce. Later, the two of us negotiated, took the order, and had the final say with HR husband. I am the master of finance and administration. I don't allow anyone to interfere with anyone and let the other party become the master of the other party's field. " In this way, their marriage was preserved. Now, their company, like marriage, has passed the dangerous period.
Just like Mr. and Mrs. Liu, many couples have gone through the running-in period after their career cooperation, and some have survived the running-in period, winning a win-win situation for their families and careers. Others were planted during the running-in period, resulting in a "lose-lose" between family and career.
A headhunter told reporters on this topic that from the perspective of loyalty, there is no more suitable entrepreneurial partner than husband and wife in the early stage of starting a business. However, when husband and wife start a business together, they must set a good boundary. Whoever cares about who must make it clear. You can't wait until there is a problem before going back to find the reason. "Unclear boundaries are the biggest cause of conflicts between husband and wife files, so if you want to be a husband and wife file, you must first have clear rights and responsibilities." The headhunter said.
Husband and wife files will make aesthetics more tired?
Nowadays, people all know that there is aesthetic fatigue between husband and wife. If this statement is true, then the husband and wife file is easy to be more aesthetically tired. First, because couples face each other every day, they spend more time together than other couples. Second, couples are often peers. Since they are peers, there is no mystery, which is one reason why couples are prone to aesthetic fatigue. However, this statement has been opposed by many couples.
Chen Qian and Liu Donghong, famous couples in Guangdong music scene, told reporters that their peers really look at their peers differently from ordinary people, but it is because they are peers that they know how to appreciate each other's talents and understand each other's hardships. For example, when practicing together, another person will know each other's hardships and appreciate each other's beauty. And if you are not a colleague, it is difficult to find this feeling of "bosom friend" and "* * *". It should be said that the husband-and-wife file makes some people tired of aesthetics, but it makes others see more beauty.
Husband and wife file: Who shines more?
There are still some subtle things in the husband and wife file that need to be handled skillfully. For example, the light of one side masks the problems of the other side. Xiaobo and her husband Harvey are both designers, and they set up a design studio together. However, because Harvey is so famous, some people say that Xiaobo relies on Harvey for support. To this, Xiao Bo disagreed. First of all, she sincerely expressed her appreciation and admiration for her husband, and admitted that she was greatly influenced by Harvey in design, but she thought this influence was good and let her see the beauty in life. As for who has more credit for the current design room, Xiaobo said frankly: "Both of them are great." Xiaobo doesn't value what others say, but what he thinks. Familiar people know that the design of wavelet is very stylish and is highly praised by many people.
Chen Qian and Liu Donghong also encountered this problem, that is, whose light is greater. Two people held a concert together. Some audiences praised Chen Qian, while others preferred Liu Donghong. For this situation, the two people have become accustomed to it and have formed a set of coping methods. "We won't compare who has more fans, but only try to improve our singing skills. Chen Qian will give me a lot of guidance and make me sing better. In life, I will also take care of Chen Qian comfortably and let him invest in the performance without worries. "
Husband and wife file: learn to balance
Because of the "double running-in" of career and life, husband and wife files need superb skills to get along with each other. Mutual appreciation is undoubtedly one of the principles. Whether Chen Qian and Liu Donghong, or Xiao Bo and Harvey, they always look at each other with appreciation, find each other's advantages, and feel happy for each other's progress. At the same time, it is also important to maintain professional communication. What good books you read, what new ideas I accepted, two people share, and finally * * * make progress together. Another point is to praise each other often. The reporter heard Liu Donghong "boast" Chen Qian, "Chen Qian sings better than me!"
In fact, in the final analysis, this is a kind of balance. Find a balance between husband and wife and business partners. On the one hand, we should forget that the other person is our other half, so as to maintain the necessary courtesy and restraint. On the other hand, we should remember that the other person is our partner, tolerate each other's shortcomings with greater tolerance, and accept this process with a more open mind. Always remind yourself that if you lose your feelings for your career, it's really not worth the candle.
Potential virus in husband and wife files:
sexual psychology
Subtle gender psychology is a very important content in husband and wife files. If it is not solved well, it is easy to cause conflicts between husband and wife. For example, the wife is the general manager and the husband is the vice president. This kind of "men are superior to women, women are superior to women" is just the opposite of the traditional "women are superior to men" structure. Some male chauvinists may feel uncomfortable. For another example, in the husband-and-wife stall, the wife is more capable than the husband and can eat more outside. As a husband, her heart may also feel lost.
Moreover, heterosexual communication can easily lead to war. Since it is a husband-and-wife file, of course, it is inevitable to socialize. Whether a husband buys a luxurious dinner for a lady or a wife and a man participate in business activities together, it may cause unhappiness between husband and wife. After all, it's hard to keep a secret in a couple's file.
Personality matching
Personality matching has been talked a lot in the workplace recently. In fact, the husband-wife file is also one of the workplaces, and the problem of personality matching cannot be avoided. Two people with different personalities may have no problem in life, because there are some disharmonious aspects in life that don't need to be run-in, but after business cooperation, these aspects may become inevitable problems, thus stimulating Mars to hit the earth. So personality matching is also a problem that couples must consider.
Relatives and friends are involved.
If it is only between husband and wife to resolve conflicts, the problem is not so complicated, but if it is mixed with relatives and friends of both sides, it is "it is difficult for honest officials to decide housework." In the family business, it is often the biggest problem to test the parties whether they can handle affairs impartially and whether rewards and punishments are clear. The treatment of relatives and friends will also affect the feelings between husband and wife.
Money rule
Although the wife is in charge of finance and the husband should listen to her, it is sometimes difficult to distinguish the boundaries. For example, my husband spent thousands more this month. Are you going to report to his wife? Failure to report will affect the wife's economic rights; Report, and affect the husband's self-esteem. Whether the money is used for work expenses or for one's own living expenses is sometimes a confused account.
The confusion of life boundary
Another big problem with couples' files is that the boundaries between work and life are more easily confused. For example, singing, if you are a partner with others, you should rest when you go home after practice, but if you are a husband and wife, you will continue to discuss whatever you say when you go home, and your work and life will be completely mixed.
Who should take care of the family more?
Two people have to go out to work hard, so who should take care of the family more, which is also easy to cause conflicts between husband and wife. Who should pay the property fee, utility fee, telephone fee and broadband fee? Who should send the children to school? The faucet is broken and the sewer is blocked. Who should repair it? You let me go and I'll let you go. Over time, discontent will arise.
Golden sentence of husband and wife cooperation
1, there is only one boss.
2. Clear division of labor.
3. Clear responsibilities.
4. Clearly define the boundaries between work and life.
5. Not only should the division of work be clear, but also the responsibilities should be clear in life. Everyone should discuss everything first.
6, understand each other and their own personality matching, know which are the "dead ends" that are prone to problems, and think about what to do when encountering "dead ends".
7, in line with the principle of "everyone is equal" between husband and wife, don't let the vanity of big men.
8. Since it is a husband-and-wife file, we should give full play to the advantages of the husband-and-wife file. If you need to communicate with the opposite sex, you might as well bring your other half with you.
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