I think most people will vomit in their hearts when sorting out housework: there are too many things! Cleaning up is too tiring! But aren't these many things accumulated bit by bit? I don't want to throw it away, but I'm too lazy to tidy it up. Sometimes I grit my teeth and put them in order. The next time I tidy up, I find a bunch of inexplicable things. The original things have been dusty and moldy somewhere. In the long run, I feel that the space is getting smaller and smaller until you are overwhelmed.
Things are like this, and so are people's hearts. They often fall into depressed experiences, feelings of failure and lost time. On the one hand, they make themselves miserable, which may not only ignore the scenery in our present life, but also lose more important things. On the other hand, they make people around them suffer, and their negative emotions slowly push people who love us away from us.
Breaking up is a life arrangement concept put forward by Japanese chores management consultant Eiko Yamashita. The so-called breakup is a kind of action technology to get to know yourself by sorting things out, sort out your inner chaos and make your life comfortable. In other words, it is to clean up the inner garbage by cleaning up the clutter at home and make life happy. Among them, breaking = cutting unnecessary things, giving up = abandoning redundant waste, leaving = leaving attachment to things.
Cut off "off" material desires, "give up" waste, get rid of "separation" obsession, and be a strong spiritual person!
Reflections on breaking away from 2. This year, 65438+ 10 has already seen the separation. At that time, I had simply tidied up the room, discarded some things and tidied up the room.
However, when I read this book again this time, I have to admit that some reference books and some concepts need to be reviewed all the time in order to achieve the unity of knowledge and practice.
The previous generation may have experienced the pain of material shortage, so they have a strong desire to hoard. And our generation, in an era of considerable material wealth, unconsciously bought a lot of items and piled them up at home. So the house is getting more and more crowded, and the storage space is never enough.
Although I also want to tidy up things at home slowly, on the one hand, I never ask myself to leave, on the other hand, I always quarrel with my parents when I throw things. Sell a refrigerator, 50 yuan. Dad thinks it's too cheap to sell and it can still be used! Completely ignoring how ugly this refrigerator pestle is at the entrance of the living room. You need to talk about selling computers. It's a working computer. It's not cost-effective to sell more than three or four thousand at first.
What's more, we should stop the cheap little things brought by our mother, such as an extra cup and a pair of chopsticks. Buy a table that can be used, but it is extremely uncomfortable. I sold a lot secretly and threw away a lot, but my home was still a mess.
Now watch "Separation" and review it again. Tell yourself all the time that we buy things just to make things useful and convenient for ourselves. However, the fact is that we have become slaves of things. Things cost money and occupy my living space, but they are not used by us. They also let us have something to sort out and standardize its position.
Maybe I can't make a good plan for my parents. At least my room must be separated slowly. If I am free tomorrow, I will start with the wardrobe and bookcase.
After reading "Separation", there is always a lot of sundries at home. There are some useless things piled everywhere on the table and in the cupboard. I always feel that some things will be used in the future, but in fact they don't have much effect and still occupy a position at home. My friend recommended me a book, Separation. When I really read it, I found that separation is not just throwing away discarded "things". The real separation should also be done: get rid of one's own inertia, take effective actions, promote life and life metabolism, and welcome a brand-new life.
The general situation of most contemporary people: they like to hoard goods and are reluctant to throw away some useless things. Take myself for example, when I see shopping advertisements, I can't help buying some non-essential items. In the face of items, I don't think about "do you want this thing", but "can this thing still be used?" I always believed that this thing would come in handy, but in the end, there were some unnecessary items in the cupboard, on the table, on the sofa and even on the floor. This kind of thinking has brought us into an era of material surplus. Separation is "the metabolism of life", and locking the necessities of life in the most appropriate amount is the initial ideal state of life. The book says: there are three kinds of people who can't let go, and I happen to belong to the past. I have always cherished the small notes I passed at school before, the watches I wore since I was a child, and the marshmallows that my classmates sent me hard ... To break up, first I have to start with the easy things, and then I have to say goodbye to the sundries. Open the lids of all your storage boxes, open drawers and wardrobe doors, let your eyes see everything in the room, and judge the quality of life by the number of sundries. When the sundries are optimized, they can be stored. In short, separation is the aesthetic of "going out". But the starting point of breaking up is "how can you not accept it?" Giving up the clutter of life can be a conceptual separation, and giving up is getting. Breaking up brings us a minimalist life. The most important thing is the virtuous circle of "going out and then entering" and "going in and then going out", which can improve the metabolic mechanism of our lives and make our lives go up a storey still higher.
Thinking about Separation 4 I got a good book "Separation" yesterday, but I was too busy to read only five pages. Zhang Defen's recommendation sequence made me think, so I read slowly. Although I read less, I gained a lot. Let me share with you:
The recommended preface is called "If you want to be happy, let go of your obsession with happiness first". When I saw the title, my first thought was "The more I want, the harder it is to get. For example, A Peng especially wants to make money, but he can't always make it. " Buddhism mentions that people have seven sufferings, and they don't want to be one of them. Let go of the beginning of seeking truth from suffering first!
This topic also reminds me of a book I recently admired, Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. The first habit-initiative, the most effective way is to expand circle of influence. And the word "let go" should mean "attention circle" Only by paying attention can we have more time and energy to do things in circle of influence and have a chance to get it.
The preface says, "Stop thinking negatively." This reminds me of the importance of thinking, as Huang said in Lifelong Learning: Six Lessons after Harvard, "Thinking affects emotions. If you want to be the master of your emotions, you must change your way of thinking and let thinking determine the occurrence of emotions. " "Key Dialogue" also mentioned that "you created your own emotions and made yourself feel scared, angry and angry. Remember, the only thing that makes you emotional is yourself, and it will always be you. " Therefore, Peng concluded that breaking the negative thinking mode will break the bad mood, and freedom and happiness will naturally come! Author: A Peng
After reading "Separation", I began to watch "Separation" today, which impressed me the most: taking the present as the time axis. Whether something should be left depends on whether it is "needed, suitable and comfortable".
Some things are memories of the past. I have seen some people keep their paychecks from a long time ago; Some people keep tickets for travel and scenic spots; Someone keeps his girlfriend's hand knitting a sweater. Many people think that these things are emotional. Although they will hardly be turned out now, they feel that they can turn over these things in the sun and recall those good times when they are old.
Some things may be used in the future. I have seen some people buy countless pieces of paper, which can't be put into the bathroom and piled up under the bed; Some people put plastic bags to buy food in the cupboard, even if they don't match the trash can, they are reluctant to throw them away; Some people keep clothes that they haven't worn for years, and they always think they can wear them next year. They need their own things to be in an adequate state forever.
In fact, there is absolutely no need to take the past and the future as the timeline.
Really good memories are always in your heart, and you don't need any external reminders at all, because you have never forgotten them. The best time is now.
It is a sign of insecurity to think that something will be useful in the future and refuse to throw it away. Instead of worrying about the future all day, it is better to save energy and hone your skills. We should make ourselves better and better and be a rational optimist.
Don't indulge in the past, don't worry about the future, and always carefully screen consumption. The criterion for judging is whether you are "needed, suitable and comfortable" now.
After reading "Break Free", Yamashita Eiko said in "Break Free": Breaking free means learning to give up first in behavior, that is, throwing away all unnecessary things. The secret of giving up is to be completely self-centered and take the present as the timeline. In fact, after reading this book carefully, we can easily find that the Japanese author's views are very close to China's traditional culture. There is an old saying in China, "Give up, give up, give up". If we want something, we must give it up. For example, if we want to continuously improve our banking business, we should give up the idea of inner comfort and strive to improve our service skills and business skills.
The author of this book refers to the total abandonment of personal behavior and thoughts, including things we don't need in daily life, or greed that fills our hearts. As a bank employee, after reading this book deeply, my deepest feeling is that proper separation can clear our minds of distractions, make our thinking more focused, and thus improve our personal efficiency.
The words "break away", "break away" and "stay" mean that we should break away first, then give up, and finally get rid of it. Why these three words should be put in the first place is actually quite meaningful. After reading it, the author thinks that separation is a philosophy of life subtraction, and we should constantly subtract too much burden from life and thought, so that our progress will be easy.
In fact, whether it is a bank employee or an ordinary person, there is a part in our hearts that needs to be separated. That part may be obsession with greed or material things, or nostalgia for yesterday's memory. If our mind is always occupied by all kinds of ideas, it will be difficult for us to concentrate and work hard. If we only recall yesterday's performance and don't pay attention to today's efforts, we will be trapped by yesterday and can't find the way to tomorrow.
Proper separation, emptying the mind of waste and rubbish, and traveling lightly will make us face all the challenges in our future work with a more relaxed attitude, with fewer fetters, and life will naturally be broad.
As office workers, we have a fast working pace and great pressure. We have little chance to visit the vegetable market, and we have lost patience in tidying up our home. Moreover, we rarely stop to look inside ourselves.
This is also an important reason why we seldom pay attention to the present. We have no clear concept of "now" more and more. Deadline is full of tasks, always looking at the near future.
Usually, the work pressure is too great, and I play wildly on weekends or holidays. However, seemingly relaxed and "hi", it does not solve the inner pressure, but makes you exhausted.
Because of limited energy, I want too much. I also want to have a successful career and a skill; I also want a beautiful face and a perfect figure; I also want to improve myself through study, and I also want to make more friends and expand my circle. ......
However, what do we really need? What can be done? There is a concept in Chinese painting called "blank space". Blank space in landscape painting can express the open water surface and create a far-reaching artistic conception; Blank space in animal paintings not only highlights the subject, but also allows the subject to move freely. Might as well calm down, carefully examine your room, throw away idle garbage, and create your own free space with cleanliness, comfort and beauty as the standard.
At the same time, I also give up my messy thoughts, recognize what I need now, define my life goals, and live every day more intently and firmly.
We might as well try to use parting to clean up the living space and thinking space for us who are tired of heavy work, to "leave blank" for our own life and live a comfortable life.
After reading "Separation" 8 "Separation", I didn't understand its meaning at first sight. An accidental TV talk show saw the meaning of separation, and then I read the book and gradually understood it.
Breaking Up is the work of Eiko Yamashita of Japan. This book is a book that recommends modern home decoration. Break up, don't buy, don't accept unnecessary things, give up, get rid of the useless things piled up at home, leave, leave your obsession with material things, and leave yourself in a spacious, comfortable and free space. Breaking up is a behavioral skill to pack things, get to know yourself, sort out inner chaos and make life more comfortable.
This book starts from the following aspects:
First, as long as you understand all kinds of secrets, you can stimulate your enthusiasm-the mechanism of breaking up.
Second, why can't you clean it up-why can't you throw it away.
Third, start from clearing up your own thoughts-the thinking rule of breaking up.
Fourth, the body begins to act-a practical way to break up.
5. Unprecedented sense of carefree and liberation-the invisible world is changing.
In our daily life, every once in a while, there will be more things in our room, especially girls, who love shopping. The convenience of online shopping stimulated their desire to buy, but also caused storage problems. No amount of accommodation space can satisfy the purchasing power of keeping pace with the times. The more things you buy, the more space you have, and the more messy your room is. In the end, I always feel that everything I have sorted out is very important, and I am reluctant to throw it away, and my mood is getting more and more annoying. How to get rid of the arrangement of home in life is not the same for emotion?
The book "Breaking Up" tells us not to use "it will come in handy one day" as an excuse, but just put things aside. We should consciously and constantly give away things and "discard" them. Only when the goods are placed in the right position can the aesthetic feeling be displayed, and this spirit should also exist in the works. Only when your mind keeps improving can you get the latest and best educational information. Being willing to give up is a sign of wisdom, and each of us is doomed not to be smooth sailing. Therefore, we must learn to use the wisdom of "giving up" in order to take the initiative in our work and life. This requires us to constantly enrich our experience over time and constantly sum up our gains and losses. Should give up, give up the old, leave room, fill in the new content, and only.
After reading "Separation" 9 1. Not many people can independently realize the great changes that tidying up living space can bring to life, which is also the great significance of such a book that systematically introduces "separation" (simply understood as tidying up home space).
2. What is parting? It can be said to be a way of life and attitude, giving up unnecessary things, breaking unnecessary desires, leaving unnecessary people, returning your life to normal metabolism, accumulating positive energy and discharging negative energy.
The arrangement of 3.7.5. 1 is very useful. According to this principle, it is really easier to get a pleasant space.
4. Breaking up is full of philosophical thoughts, such as extremes meet, and water overflows. If we pile things too slowly, it will waste the earth's resources, make our living space narrow and messy, and then affect our mood and life experience. If we pile up our desires too much, we will pursue them by hook or by crook, overdraw the energy of life, and finally get no happiness and happiness.
The first step of parting is to think seriously about things I don't need or like, to be brave enough to give them up and to avoid buying. The second step is to arrange each space according to the principle of 75 1, so that the space is concise and artistic. The third step is to form the way of thinking and behavior of breaking up through daily break-up training, constantly create good and orderly interpersonal relationships, and constantly improve and sublimate their free and easy personality characteristics, thus truly changing the original chaotic and disorderly life state.
6. The most important thing is that when we really leave what we like through screening, we can really focus on the people we love without being disturbed by other things. Such a life is truly full, happy and meaningful.
After reading Breakthrough 10, I recently read Breakthrough, and I like one sentence very much: If there is nothing I can do, I should stop; People who have no chance in life should give up; I can't forget it in my heart, I have to go; In my opinion, everything is a memory; All I think about is the past; Let go of your obsession and return to peace.
Like to like, but giving up these three words is easier said than done.
What can't be done is broken; No, it's not a decision, but you must accept your powerlessness.
People who have no chance in life should give up; Wrong, not to give up, but to accept the absence of both sides.
Here, you have no choice, not that you have the initial intention of breaking up, but that you are forced to accept the result of breaking up.
Then, I'm happy to be here, and I'm obsessed with it.
But even if the result is already in front of you, even if you just need to accept the result, you still can't do it. Under any circumstances, you can't go in if you want, and go out if you want. You don't have the ability to do it with ease.
At this time, the writer Feng Tang will tell you: When you really can't let go, go to the intensive care unit or the cemetery, and you will easily understand that you have got too much, and then you will be insatiable, with too little time and too many interesting things. From the perspective of respecting life, there is no need to entangle.
But this world has never been empathetic, only self-knowledge. You have never experienced the edge of life and death, you will feel that living is a big deal, but those you can't let go are not small things.
There is no need to give up on yourself, because everything you can't let go has your expectation and dedication. People who can't do anything, people who don't have a chance, and people who are obsessed with it, give it to time.
Perhaps, on a sunny morning, you suddenly let go. You can't do anything, you still work hard; You still appreciate those who have no chance to share. It's just that the heart is a little more hell and the heart is a little less heaven.
Reflections on detachment 1 1 What is detachment?
Breaking up is meditation.
The protagonist of parting is not the object, but himself. This is a technology of selecting objects with "the relationship between objects and themselves" as the core.
Cut off: cut off unnecessary things that want to enter your home.
She: Throw away the rubbish everywhere in the house.
Through repeated breaking and giving up, the state of "separation" is finally achieved.
Separation: get rid of the obsession with things and stay in a comfortable space.
How to break it?
Articles are valuable only when they are useful. It's useful to me.
How to give up?
Throw away things that have nothing to do with you now. Using things higher than image, cheap things, will degrade yourself.
What is the state of separation?
In a relaxed and relaxed state.
In the process of giving up, the skills of sorting and storing:
July 5 1 day principle: the invisible storage space can only be filled 70%, the visible storage space can only be filled 50%, and the storage space for others can only be filled 10%.
Trigonometry: there are three categories, and there are three subcategories in the category.
Articles should be placed as upright as possible. There are fewer steps when using items.
It is not thought that changes action, but action that changes thought.
My actions:
Old clothes with dull colors, short-sleeved shorts from many years ago, can't be worn outside. I always want to take them as home clothes, look at myself in the mirror and throw them away decisively.
I have been looking for ways to use the ipad, but I can't bear to lose it. It was inconvenient to use, so I decided to sell it.
Strengthen the understanding of items, improve the level of appreciation, improve the ability to pick good things, download app, and pay attention to men's items.
The skill of breaking up is not only applied to sorting things out. Can be extrapolated, such as interpersonal communication.
The time of separation was very painful. At first, I was too forced and anxious. Adjust and let the separation cycle several times, first throw away a part, then think about observing your life, then give up a part after a while and repeat it.
Be a person who lives in the present and can act immediately.
Thoughts on breaking away from 12 first-rate theory and third-rate writing:
I find it difficult to summarize the outline of this book. Although the book has subdivided chapters and added many subheadings, it feels that the main text is irrelevant and the content is repetitive, which makes the book logically confused and unclear.
Later, I read a comment, which was different from other rigid praises. The author's comment on the book's "first-rate theory and third-rate writing" solved my doubts to the nail on the head.
Of course, there are many exclusive real cases and image metaphors in the book, which can give us more vivid inspiration and are worth reading. But even if you haven't read this book, you can start practicing through the outline of the last issue.
"Break up" is not a verb;
(1) What are the words to give up?
Now we have understood that breaking, giving up and leaving are three words: two verbs (action) and a noun (state).
If "breaking up" is only understood as a verb-"giving up", that is, throwing things, then the concept of "breaking up" is completely misunderstood or despised. Just keep giving up and don't deserve to be called "breaking up". You may continue to buy and throw away unnecessary things, and you will still be trapped in the whirlpool of material.
② Separation is a noun.
If we insist on taking parting as a word, it is by no means a verb, but a noun, which is a state we have experienced through the practice of parting: we don't have to deliberately "give up" or "break up" with grievances, but a natural state of life.
"Breaking away" is "green breaking away";
I have introduced "green shed" before, and I feel more advanced than "shed". It advocates responsible throwing and buying. After reading Separation, I think there is no conflict between the two. "Disengagement" has never made us throw and buy irresponsibly. Essentially, detachment is green.
Let's see what green isolation is.
Green, live with the concept of sustainability. Try to buy environmentally friendly products when shopping. Give up, give up hoarding. Lessismore, choose the ultimate product to cure yourself. Leave, temporarily leave the act of throwing things, and work hard in the direction of zero debris.
It can be seen that the two are by no means contradictory. Green separation is a derivative of separation and an understanding of the practice of separation, that is, the state of separation. Green separation explains "separation" more clearly and answers many people's doubts about living in poverty after separation.
After reading "Separation 13", I saw the spiritual separation of Eiko Yamashita today. I didn't expect to gain a lot, because I thought I had done a good job in sorting out my thoughts, but I still have a lot to wake up after reading all the way. Disengagement emphasizes my self-concern and the present. I am familiar with this part now, and I can enlighten others most of the time. However, there seems to be no good practice in my own reality. Recently, I have a lot of things. Faced with all kinds of study exams and daily chores, I suddenly feel a lot of pressure. Today, I arranged it in my mind according to Eiko's method. It's not that hard. As long as I concentrate on what I can do now, I won't be overwhelmed by the task pile.
Egocentrism is based on self-worth, while others' centeredness is often a manifestation of lack of self-worth. I hope others think I am a good person, which seems to be talking about myself. Think of the sun in my chart in the seventh house, Pluto, Libra and Neptune. It is really a person who attaches great importance to the relationship and lacks self, but always pays attention to the relationship, losing self-centeredness and self-worth, which also leads to problems in the relationship and can't express himself clearly in the relationship. It leads others to think that they can treat themselves casually, but they have a sense of imbalance in their hearts and are forced to do things they don't want to do, which makes them very uncomfortable. There are just two people in my family who like to invade my personal judgment and decision-making field, and they don't get along well.
I suddenly understood why my family and my family made me feel unhappy. Because the private sphere of self has been trampled on, personal choices and decisions have been denied, just as personal value judgment and aesthetics have been denied, which is equivalent to self-denial. Anyone will be full of anger. How can they have a good sense of self-worth when they grow up in such an environment? I think my mother is really a person with a low sense of self-worth, so I hope to get affirmation by giving it to others. Because of my lack of heart, I am also stingy with praising others, and these have been passed on to us, which has become our relationship and psychological difficulties.
Although I knew something about this problem before, I didn't know it deeply enough. Today, this book makes me re-examine this problem and finally understand the real crux of the problem. Even people who have been in love for many years may feel that they can't stand such criticism and self-righteous suggestions. Respecting each other's hobbies and choices is the best maintenance of the relationship.
After reading Separation, 14 has different definitions for each step of finishing:
Fold the washed clothes on the sofa, put the scattered toys in the toy box and put the books back on the bookshelf ... in parting, these are all sorting, not sorting. As I said before, in the breakup, the so-called cleaning is "screening out the necessary items."
It can be seen that the arrangement referred to by the author is the arrangement in the public concept, that is, the arrangement and reception are confused, not the arrangement in the arrangement.
I am not picky. I must clarify these so-called concepts. In fact, as long as I understand the essence of breaking up, all concepts are floating clouds. But if you want to learn to organize further, the chaotic concept system will affect your practice. Ignore the differences between Chinese and Japanese characters and the translation level. After all, we have heard a lot of "cleaning up" since childhood, and we can't say that it is throwing things.
But through comparison, we know more clearly that the so-called sorting technology is the same. No matter which word is used to define it, the steps of sorting are these three steps: ① reducing and controlling the number of items, ② collecting and placing items reasonably, and ③ daily cleaning.
The purpose of practice is different;
Breaking up is internal work with the help of external work, and ending is external work attached to internal work. Disengagement is the performance art of getting to know yourself by packing things, sorting out your inner chaos and making life more comfortable.
In other words, cleaning up the garbage at home and cleaning up the garbage inside is a way to make life happy.
From the beginning, the author clearly expressed that the purpose of breaking up is to sort out the heart, and sorting out things is only its means. For beginners, there is no way to cultivate their minds, so we should start by sorting out our own wardrobes. In addition, Duan Sheri thinks that storage is dispensable. Once Duanshe succeeds and there are fewer things, there is no need to learn to store.
And finishing is completely extroverted, changing the external environment through external actions. This action starts with reducing items, which is completely in line with "breaking+giving up". However, whether it will reach the realm of "separation" is not the intensity of finishing, nor is it the end point of finishing.
After reading "Separation" 15, it makes people feel a lot. It is not easy to break away in life. If you don't cling to material things and give up what seems to be waste at present, we will think about what to do if you use it one day. Disconnect the unnecessary from the unsuitable, but human instinct is to want what I like. As for whether it is suitable for your current needs, it is rarely considered, such as snapping up. Therefore, in practice, it is also a painful thing to break away from traditional thinking, which often needs external force to promote.
In essence, the promotion of breaking up is also an external force, educating people to change themselves and awakening people's initiative. Especially in the environmental improvement of new countryside, the performance is more prominent. In rural areas, firewood is littered, and free-range chicken, duck and goose droppings, such as bricks and stones, are everywhere inside and outside the courtyard. It is difficult to expect farmers to take the initiative to do a good job, so the government's publicity and education, investment and efforts have all been forced to transform, so that rural construction will be brand-new and develop into urbanization.
The same is true of our express delivery industry. The headquarters of Xuzhou ZTO Express Line emphasizes that the facade of the contracted area should be well done, in strict accordance with government requirements, and the environment should be well done, orderly and safe. , and held many meetings to carry out publicity and education, in order to enhance the initiative of the contracting areas. The government will investigate, and if it fails to meet the requirements, it will be fined or even banned. Our headquarters of Xuzhou ZTO Express also actively cooperated with the government to inspect and urge the contracted area to split up and build a good facade, and reward the contracted area for construction.
Therefore, external forces combined with our initiative will be separated, improve our facade, improve our working environment, deal with interpersonal relationships, etc., and work easily and happily to further expand and strengthen our cause in ZTO Express.