In the past two years, due to the need of raising children, I have been dealing with the group of "nannies" more. I started looking for my aunt again the other day. There are many aunts to contact in the mobile phone address book, so I searched my mind for several aunts who are expected to go home to serve.
One of them is a post-80s girl. According to my judgment, she is a kind and simple child. I sent her a message, and WeChat showed that I was not her good friend. I was stupid for a few seconds on the way to WeChat: Huh? Didn't we add friends before? At that time, I didn't know I was hacked, so I added my friends, and the other party passed by and had a good chat.
Another aunt, who had a good relationship with me at that time. I sent her a message, which also shows that we are not good friends. This time, I know I was hacked.
This part concludes that I was hacked from the group of "Auntie". There is no distinction between high and low division of labor, but it is understandable that different jobs bring people different feelings and different horizons and change people's views on the world.
The next black is more direct and unambiguous, which comes from my psychological counseling work.
Every day, 5-6 people add me to work on WeChat. In view of my busy work and life, I don't have much time to communicate why psychological counseling should be charged. My experience and consistent view is that when they visit with consulting motivation, they will pay for consulting at the first time, asking too many questions and hesitating too much. TA's subconscious may not be ready to come to a counselor. It doesn't matter whether you come or not, whether you pay or not. As a psychological counselor, I have been here. I'm always here when you need advice.
Although I have never deleted any work visits, I have indeed been hacked by some visits. Yesterday, a visitor came to ask if he could consult a rebellious child. I said yes, and then I said about the charge. The other party asked me where I was, and I said in Wuhan. Then, I threw it over and said, forget it ... I was ready to respond immediately: it doesn't matter. Before I could write the words, a line appeared on the screen, telling me that we are no longer friends. Well, I was even rejected by the other side because of the euphemistic ending.
Another one came to me: Can consultation be free? I said no, ask again, even free analysis is not enough. I said no, this is my job. Similarly, I also got a goodbye. And then, you know, I passed out.
Behind the "black" behavior, there is naturally emotional expression, anger or complaint, which is a direct denial of others. In fact, eliminating the need for mobile phone memory and putting one more person in our address book will basically not have any bad influence on our lives. Then, behind the blackening, you can't allow this person to exist, only allow a name to exist on your mobile phone, as if it is difficult for you to go. To be exact: you can't accommodate an "existence you don't like" at all.
Otherwise, we can accept that a "existence we don't like" exists in our life, and we work so hard to eliminate it. I think the emotion brought by this kind of "existence" is not something you can digest at the moment, either the impact of the other party is too strong or your psychological space is not enough. The former, related to your impact resistance, needs to enhance the compression resistance; In the latter case, your psychological space is obviously insufficient and needs to be expanded. If there is another option C, it is that your character and cultivation are not enough, and you need to be reborn to find a better educational environment, parents or family, or school. Anyway, soak you in a better container. This is a little divorced from reality, and it is not easy to operate ...? Hey hey.
Once hacked, I think you must experience the feeling of separation and break, and the other person must experience the feeling of being denied, abandoned or separated.
I've been hacked, so I can be fine. If you are hacked, please don't complain that the other person has no cultivation and bad machine morality. That's a defense or protection for TA. Don't reflect on why you were hacked. My approach is: although I don't want to be hacked, if I am hacked, I will turn over a page here, that is, a full stop, without feelings. This is the best gift for myself and others.
Figure | Network
Slow down and live with your heart. I am Jiang Min, a psychological counselor, and I am willing to find my heart with you in my life.
Welcome to pay attention to WeChat official account: Xiangbu Psychology ID:JiangminXL.