The waiter's true confession: the loneliest place in the world is easy to forget but needs love more.

Ailong photo "We take care of not only the old man's body, but also her lonely heart." . Families who have been taken care of for a long time sometimes walk on the edge of out-of-control pressure, and the economic burden cannot be unloaded, or the parent-child relationship has been intertwined, because the temporary tension is almost on the verge, and then the strange waiter becomes another object of emotional projection. A waiter must settle his heart before he can settle other people's lives. Interviewee/waiter Xiuqin "doesn't work hard. My husband hugged Xiuqin's shoulder and told her that there are still many kinds of jobs to choose from, and there is no need to be a waiter and no dignity. On several occasions, she lingered at the crossroads of whether to leave her job or not. The censure and unkind curses of her family made her hold back her tears in an unfriendly environment, and she also tried to refuse each other's unreasonable demands in a gentle way. But the accumulated and depressed emotions continue to consume her mind-"Why should I receive such treatment?" "She is tolerant but intolerant, soft but not weak and unwilling to give up. She is not angry and proves that she can, but she always feels that there is a thread pulling her. One day, after hugging an old woman, she suddenly realized ... "Although some situations are unbearable," every family has its own experience. "I don't know their life stories, but I learned something from their treatment. Maybe, they don't want this either. Xiuqin thought that she might be able to patiently and gently let them gradually understand-"She is a helper, not an intruder. "Use her actions and words to guide the case handlers to put their emotions on" * * * knowledge "and resolve their differences. For example, if they think her fish is not delicious, let them teach them a few tricks to make a delicious fish dish that meets the expectations of the case handlers. For another example, I couldn't understand that she had to ask for leave because of a bad cold, so I reasoned with them: "My bad thoughts and behaviors are not good, and the quality of my work is discounted. What if I infected you? "Grandma is old and weak, and must not be contagious. It is better to let me take a day off first, and I can take care of my grandmother when I recover. " Don't accept each other's emotions, and don't get caught up in your own. After Xiuqin broke away from the victim's role, everything became a little different like the butterfly effect. After a few hours, the husband who came home scolded her (the other party was prone to emotional instability) and took the initiative to care about her: "It's raining outside. Do you have an umbrella? " There are many umbrellas at home. Do you want to take them? Because Xiuqin still treats their family with a gentle attitude, does not take emotions that do not belong to her, does not shrink back, does not fear, and proves everything with her own professionalism. "They are not hard-hearted, but lack the opportunity to be gentle and kind to each other. Xiuqin learned-tolerant but not tolerant, soft but not weak. Families who have been taken care of for a long time sometimes walk on the edge of out-of-control pressure, unable to unload their financial burden, or have complicated parent-child relationship, because the temporary tension is almost on the verge, and then the strange waiter becomes another object of emotional projection. A waiter must settle his heart before he can settle other people's lives. Love takes care of not only the old man's body, but also her lonely heart. "... families who have been taken care of for a long time are sometimes on the verge of out-of-control pressure, and the financial burden cannot be removed, or the parent-child relationship has been intertwined, because the temporary tension is almost on the verge, and then the strange waiter becomes another object of emotional projection. A waiter must settle his heart before he can settle other people's lives. Interviewee/waiter Xiuqin "doesn't work hard. My husband hugged Xiuqin's shoulder and told her that there are still many kinds of jobs to choose from, and there is no need to be a waiter and no dignity. On several occasions, she lingered at the crossroads of whether to leave her job or not. The censure and unkind curses of her family made her hold back her tears in an unfriendly environment, and she also tried to refuse each other's unreasonable demands in a gentle way. But the accumulated and depressed emotions continue to consume her mind-"Why should I receive such treatment?" "She is tolerant but intolerant, soft but not weak and unwilling to give up. She is not angry and proves that she can, but she always feels that there is a thread pulling her. One day, after hugging an old woman, she suddenly realized ... "Although some situations are unbearable," every family has its own problems. " I don't know their life stories, but I learned something from their treatment. Maybe, they don't want this either. Xiuqin thought that she might be able to let them know gradually with patience and gentleness-"She is a helper, not an intruder." Use her actions and words to guide the case handlers to put their emotions on "* * * knowledge" and resolve differences. For example, if they think her fish is not delicious, let them teach them a few tricks to make a delicious fish dish that meets the expectations of the case handlers. For another example, I couldn't understand that she had to ask for leave because of a bad cold, so I reasoned with them: "My bad thoughts and behaviors are not good, and the quality of my work is discounted. What if I infect you? " Grandma is old and weak, so she must not be contagious. Why don't you let me take a day off first, and I can take care of grandma when I get well. "Don't accept each other's emotions, and don't get stuck in your own emotions. After Xiuqin broke away from the victim's role, everything became a little different like the butterfly effect. After a few hours, the husband who came home scolded her (the other party was prone to emotional instability) and took the initiative to care about her: "It's raining outside. Do you have an umbrella? "There are many umbrellas at home. Do you want to take them? Because Xiuqin still treats the people in their family with a gentle attitude, does not take emotions that do not belong to her, does not shrink back, does not fear, and proves everything with her professionalism. " They are not hard-hearted, but lack the opportunity to be gentle and kind to each other. Xiuqin learned-tolerant but not tolerant, soft but not weak. Families who have been taken care of for a long time sometimes walk on the edge of out-of-control pressure, unable to unload their financial burden, or have complicated parent-child relationship, because the temporary tension is almost on the verge, and then the strange waiter becomes another object of emotional projection. A waiter must settle his heart before he can settle other people's lives. The most lonely place in the world-the old man is there, but you turn a blind eye. What Xiuqin likes best is the memory of a grandmother. "I sometimes feel that my gains far exceed my efforts. My grandmother gave me a lot of strength and let me see myself differently. At my grandmother's house, someone came back very late. My grandmother, who is unable to move, is almost like an "old man living alone". She can't go out and no one cares about her. Frugal, she is reluctant to turn on the light. When it is cold, she turns on the heating, and when it is hot, she turns on the air conditioner ... But when the valet comes, grandma is willing to turn on the light, and there is a sound in the room. The place that looked lifeless has become a home with temperature. Grandma always tells me about her family or the TV series she watches, and I always listen and chat with her. Does that sound like a big deal? But in fact, it is very valuable to grandma. The delicate Xiuqin saw the old man's desire for companionship. Every time he is ready to leave, his grandmother's eyes always show reluctance. Once Xiuqin summoned up her courage and said to her sad grandmother, "Can I hug you? """Grandma, I'm so happy to chat with you! Seeing you is like seeing your grandmother! "Aunt is very happy! In the past, she was always lonely during the day, but at night, even if her family went home, no one talked to her ... With Xiuqin's company, grandma was not only in good spirits, but also in good health. "People say that physiology affects psychology, and psychology also affects physiology; Grandma who is in a better mood feels alive again. Loneliness and melancholy are easily overlooked diseases. Unfortunately, too few people are willing to see it. Not only grandma, but also many old people need to be taken care of. Even if you just say hello, every day's greetings can make them feel that they still have a sense of existence. " Besides taking care of their daily life, the job of waiter has given me the greatest gift and value. In fact, it is to take care of their hearts and let laughter and love flow again in this family. I don't need any profound theories or special skills, just "companionship", "listening" and "caring". ""I looked at my grandmother's house from a distance, where it was dark; But as I approached, the lights in the room came on slowly. I know grandma is waiting for me at the door, and I will bring laughter and temperature. Living in a house can become a sentimental home. A housekeeper who takes care of others also needs others' care, cherishes Xiuqin and takes pride in his work, just like bringing a lamp into the heart of an old man; It's easy to forget there, where love is needed. At present, the continuing education of housekeepers is still based on nursing skills, but Xiuqin believes that people who take care of them also need to be taken care of. However, the current continuing education generally lacks courses such as spiritual growth and stress communication. We should let the housekeeper learn how to eliminate the difficulties and challenges they encounter, instead of taking the difficulties to heart. Although the housekeeper is doing things, she is facing people (families), and the degree of change and complexity of coping sometimes exceeds the imagination of ordinary people. "I am very lucky, my family supports and encourages me, and I have taken some courses myself to avoid falling into many emotional traps, but are other waiters so lucky?" "Finally, Xiuqin said, did you hear the waiter's voice? * In order to protect the privacy of the case, the waiter was exposed as an alias. About the author: Ai Zhaochang's editorial team is the most practical combination of medical care, emotional support, disease knowledge and social resources. We are a professional team standing with nursing staff. Don't forget-"If you take good care of your silver hair, you will find Al Zhao Chang"! Go from here >> Ailong photo fan page, Ailong photo platform