There is not a green leaf, not a wisp of smoke, not a grain of soil, not a trace of flowers, only a world of water and a sea of clouds.
When the typhoon struck, a lonely bird was homeless and landed on a board swept into the ocean, drifting down the river, slowly coming, near, near! ……
Suddenly, the bird spread its wings and circled over people's heads several times. "Poof!" " It landed on the boat. Maybe you are tired? Or have you discovered the "New World"? The sailor drove it away, grabbed it and it fell into your palm. The lovely bird and the kind sailor became friends.
You see, how beautiful it is. Its delicate mouth, green pecking feathers and duck-like flat feet show the goose yellow of spring grass. The sailors took it to the cabin, "paved" it and let it settle down on the ship. They give it a plastic tube of fresh water every day to share with the delicious fish brought from the motherland. Over time, the affection between birds and sailors became deeper and deeper. In the morning, when a beam of sunshine shines into the porthole, it opens its beautiful voice and sings like a spring. Human beings gave it life, and it devoted its artistic youth to those who raised it. Maybe it's all like this? Artists' youth will only be dedicated to those who respect them.
Birds cast a romantic color on sailing life. When returning home, people couldn't put it down and wanted to take it to a foreign land. But the bird is haggard, giving water, not drinking! Feed the meat, don't eat it! The smooth feathers lost their luster. Yes, we have our own motherland and birds have their own homes. People and animals are the same, and nothing is as good as home!
The loving sailors decided to let it go and let it return to the cradle of the sea and the blue hometown. Before leaving, this friend of nature took a group photo with the sailors as a souvenir. It stands on many people's heads, shoulders, palms and arms, and blends into the blue picture with those who have fed it. ...
From Wang Wenjie's "Lovely Birds"
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A few short stories about Putonghua
1. Once I bought an apple and sold it to two people. I asked what kind of apple it was. One of them answered "hard ball". I said to myself, I have never heard of this name. Another bought an apple and asked what it was. Another replied "Welcome to autumn". I suddenly realized that people who say "hard ball" can't speak Mandarin, which made me wonder.
On the bus in Beijing, a foreigner took out a ten-yuan ticket and said to the conductor, "Did you see it?" ! Have you seen it? ! The conductor ignored it; The outsider said, "Have you seen it? ! Have you seen it? ! "The conductor suppressed the fire and still ignored it; Repeatedly, the conductor finally flew into a rage, took out a 50 yuan ticket, poked it in front of outsiders and shouted, "Did you see it? "Outsiders are surprised and scared, and they say," How can a conductor in Beijing do this? "
Everyone is puzzled, only after asking: foreigners want to buy tickets and say "Jianguomen, Jianguomen"!
3. A county magistrate with a strong dialect went to the village to make a report:
"Rabbit, shrimp, pig tail! No pickles, pickles are too expensive! ! "
(Comrades and villagers, pay attention! Stop talking and have a meeting now! ! )
After the county magistrate finished speaking, the host said, "Please give me sausages and pickles!"
Now, please ask the flight attendant to speak! )
The township head said, "Rabbit, the dog ate today's meal, and everyone is a big jerk!" "
Comrades, that's enough for today. Let's make a big bowl! )
"Don't be a cantaloupe, I'll pick up a shit and lick it for you. . . "
Stop it. I'll tell you a story. . . )
"Someone may eat this shit."
Someone may know the story. )
"Don't worry if you can't eat."
I will give it to you now.
4. Once upon a time, there was a small official who made a living by teaching after retirement. He looks down on craftsmen. one
On the Dragon Boat Festival in 2008, a student invited him to dinner. The students are hiring two teachers, a tailor and a carpenter.
Fu works, and the students' father asks them to sit at the same table. The gentleman thought: these two "reds"
Foot guy ",stained with my light, to ridicule them. At dinner, he said, "Today's East.
This is a family gathering. How about we sit at the same table and read some poems to help us wake up? "Two teachers.
Answer: "All right."
He proudly said: "From one o'clock, senior officials, distinguished guests, birds, chickens, ducks and geese, without me."
Sir, how to eat chickens, ducks and geese? "
Hearing this, the tailor continued, "Under the word rain, frost, rain and dew, next to the word clothes, shirts and coats,
Pants, I don't sew shirts, jackets and pants. How can I resist the frost and snow, sir? "
The carpenter's master also said slowly, "First, raw, cow, wooden characters next to it, lattice,
Iron fences, buildings, carpenters don't build iron fences, where is your husband's cow! "
Hearing this, the retired junior official blushed and was short of breath, and there was nothing to answer.
Once upon a time, there was a rich man who wanted to open a hotel, so he spent three cents to buy a new store.
Lian.
A scholar went to apply. The rich man said, "couplets should praise my wine, acetic acid and pig fat.
It's crowded and there are no mice in the shop. "
Picking up a pen, the scholar quickly wrote:
The first part is: raising pigs is like a mountain, and the mouse's head dies.
The bottom line is: the jar is good, but the vinegar jar is sour.
The horizontal recognition is: more people, less illness and more money.
After the scholar finished writing, he shook his head and read the couplet as:
"Raising pigs is as big as a mountain mouse, and my head is dead."
"The wine vat is good for vinegar, and the altar is sour."
"There are many sick people and less wealth."
6. During the summer vacation, my mother took Longlong to visit my grandfather in the country. Grandpa was very happy and asked with concern.
Longlong: "How are you studying?"
Longlong: "I'm in grade one."
Grandpa thought for a moment and said, "Study hard. I have to study on the first day, the fifteenth day and even the next day. "
Only by studying in the sky can you study well. "
7. I met a fellow countryman at the airport one day. He asked me what I was studying abroad, and I said:
"Solution chemistry." He said, "You're welcome, man. There is no simple chemical reaction. "
8. A commodity salesman went to Guangzhou on business. After arriving in Beijing, he wanted to fly before.
I used to send a telegram to the manager, fearing that the manager would not agree to the reimbursement: "Seize the opportunity."
No? "The manager received the telegram and thought it was an" opportunity "to clinch a deal. He immediately called back:" You can take it.
Multiply "
The salesman came back from a business trip to reimburse the travel expenses, and the manager took a plane with insufficient level.
The provisions of the plane will not be reimbursed, and the plane ticket fee will not be reimbursed. The salesman killed the manager and came back.
Electricity, the manager was dumbfounded.
A story about Putonghua
A compound cavalry was unfortunately captured in the battle.
"We will kill all the prisoners," the enemy leader said to him. "However, because of your heroic and admirable performance in the battle, I can kill them in three days and meet your three requirements before that. Now, you can make your first request. "
Without thinking, the cavalry said, "I want to say something to my horse." The leader agreed.
So the cavalry went over and whispered a word to his horse. Hearing this, the horse roared and galloped away.
At dusk, the horse came back with a beautiful girl on its back.
The leader exclaimed, "What a wonderful BMW!" He said, "However, I still want to kill you. What is your second requirement? " The cavalry asked to talk to the horse again.
The leader agreed, so the cavalry whispered a few words to the horse again, and the horse roared again and galloped away.
At dusk, the horse came back again, this time a girl riding on its back, more sexy and moving than last time.
The leader was greatly impressed: "You and your horse are really an eye-opener, but I will kill you tomorrow. Now you make one last request. "
The cavalry thought for a moment and said, "I want to talk to my horse alone."
The leader felt very strange, but nodded in agreement and left with his entourage, leaving only the cavalry and his BMW in the tent.
The cavalry stared at his horse, suddenly grabbed its ear and said angrily, "I repeat, take a brigade, not a woman!" " "
What are the short stories about Mandarin?
A short story about Putonghua
Cheng Xiao met Mr. Qian in the toilet. Cheng Xiao should wash his hands, so should Mr. Qian. Cheng Xiao said, "Teacher, please die first. Teacher Qian knew that Cheng Xiao's pronunciation was wrong, so he scolded (X) and died (S). He hoped that Cheng Xiao could find this mistake by himself and said, "I won't die. Unexpectedly, Cheng Xiao still didn't find his mistake, so he went on to ask, "Why don't you die? Teacher Qian said, "I don't want to die. Cheng Xiao, why haven't you found out that you misspelled the word "wash" and called it "death". 」
Xiao Wu is an employee of the Beijing office of a Hong Kong company. One day, the company sent him and two other colleagues from Beijing to meet people at the airport. Xiao Wu calls his colleagues in the street. As he walked, he said, "When are we going to hijack the plane? Shall the three of us grab it together? When a policeman heard this, he asked Xiao Wu, "What did you say you were going to do? Hijacking? " Xiao Wu said, "Oh, I'm sorry, I made a mistake. I mean to pick up the (ji) plane, not to rob the (ji) plane. 」
On the bus in Beijing, a foreigner took out a ten-yuan ticket and said to the conductor, "Did you see it?" ! Have you seen it? ! The conductor ignored it; The outsider said, "Have you seen it? ! Have you seen it? ! "The conductor suppressed the fire and still ignored it; Repeatedly, the conductor finally flew into a rage, took out a 50 yuan ticket, poked it in front of outsiders and shouted, "Did you see it? "Outsiders are surprised and scared, and they say," How can a conductor in Beijing do this? "Everyone is very puzzled. When asked, they know that foreigners want to buy tickets and say' Jianguomen, Jianguomen'.
One day by bus, there were a lot of people. The last person who got on the bus managed to squeeze his head and feet in, but * * * was outside the door. As a result, the conductor accidentally caught his * * * when he closed the door. I heard the man shout, "I've been arrested, open the door!" " "Although the conductor didn't know who Mao was, he saw that the man was caught and quickly opened the car door. After a while, the conductor asked the man, "What is hair? That's called * * *. " " *** ? The place where I live is Mao. "That man has a point." You are in Beijing now, not in your hometown. Who can understand you? Remember in the future: only * * *. "The conductor is not to be outdone. The man was silent. After about three stops, the bus arrived at Andingmen. The conductor shouted, "Here is the Andingmen. Please get off. As soon as the voice fell, the man approached the conductor and said, "You are wrong. You just said it's called * * *, so why isn't Andingmen called * * *? The conductor and the whole bus laughed in surprise.
A short story about popularizing Putonghua.
I went to Tangshan by train, and a girl of seventeen or eighteen spoke to me in Mandarin. She said that she was a specialist in Fengnan and went to Beijing to see her sister. I asked her strangely, "Are you from Fengnan? Why don't you speak with a Fengnan accent? " She said, "Hey, speak Mandarin when you are away from home!" "Do you still speak Mandarin when you go home?" "I can't talk when I go home, or my mother says I have a Beijing accent."
Comments: The primary stage of popularizing Putonghua is bound to go through a stage of speaking both dialects and Putonghua. Young people have the consciousness of speaking Mandarin when they go out, which is the result of school education and the expression of modern consciousness. As for the language concept of the elderly, it will gradually change with the progress of the times.
Putonghua short story
Once I bought an apple and sold it to two people. I asked what kind of apple it was. One of them answered "hard ball". I said to myself, I have never heard of this name. Another bought an apple and asked what it was. Another replied "Welcome to autumn". I suddenly realized that people who say "hard ball" can't speak Mandarin, which made me wonder why Apple is called "hard ball".
Fun, super funny ~ ~ ~
Cheng Xiao met Mr. Qian in the toilet. Cheng Xiao should wash his hands, so should Mr. Qian. Cheng Xiao said, "Teacher, please die first. Teacher Qian knew that Cheng Xiao's pronunciation was wrong, so he scolded (X) and died (S). He hoped that Cheng Xiao could find this mistake by himself and said, "I won't die. Unexpectedly, Cheng Xiao still didn't find his mistake, so he went on to ask, "Why don't you die? Teacher Qian said, "I don't want to die. Cheng Xiao, why haven't you found out that you misspelled the word "wash" and called it "death". 」
Xiao Wu is an employee of the Beijing office of a Hong Kong company. One day, the company sent him and two other colleagues from Beijing to meet people at the airport. Xiao Wu calls his colleagues in the street. As he walked, he said, "When are we going to hijack the plane? Shall the three of us grab it together? When a policeman heard this, he asked Xiao Wu, "What did you say you were going to do? Hijacking? " Xiao Wu said, "Oh, I'm sorry, I made a mistake. I mean to pick up the (ji) plane, not to rob the (ji) plane. 」
On the bus in Beijing, a foreigner took out a ten-yuan ticket and said to the conductor, "Did you see it?" ! Have you seen it? ! The conductor ignored it; The outsider said, "Have you seen it? ! Have you seen it? ! "The conductor suppressed the fire and still ignored it; Repeatedly, the conductor finally flew into a rage, took out a 50 yuan ticket, poked it in front of outsiders and shouted, "Did you see it? "Outsiders are surprised and scared, and they say," How can a conductor in Beijing do this? "
Everyone is puzzled, only after asking: foreigners want to buy tickets and say "Jianguomen, Jianguomen"!
Urgent for a story about Mandarin, about 50 words, not too much.
The story of Putonghua
I went to Tangshan by train, and a girl of seventeen or eighteen spoke to me in Mandarin. She said that she was from Fengnan and went to Beijing to see her sister. I asked her strangely, "Are you from Fengnan? Why don't you speak with a Fengnan accent? " She said, "Hey, speak Mandarin when you are away from home!" "Do you still speak Mandarin when you go home?" "I can't talk when I go home, or my mother says I have a Beijing accent."
Comments: The primary stage of popularizing Putonghua is bound to go through a stage of speaking both dialects and Putonghua. Young people have the consciousness of speaking Mandarin when they go out, which is the result of school education and the expression of modern consciousness. As for the language concept of the elderly, it will gradually change with the progress of the times.
Secondly,
A girl from Hebei was introduced to a young man from Shandong. From the first time we met, we all talked in Mandarin. On the wedding night, the groom said to the bride, "I will speak Shandong dialect in the future!" " "The bride asked," Didn't you always speak Mandarin to me? " "I'm not afraid you think my culture is low! Now that I'm married to you, I should relax. "
A year later, the child was born. When the baby began to babble, the young father suddenly changed his mouth to speak Mandarin. He said, "You can't let your children learn local dialects from primary school."
Comments: Speaking Mandarin is the embodiment of cultural literacy. Young parents let their children learn to speak Mandarin from an early age, which shows that they are responsible for their children's life.
third
Three years ago, a school official went back to his hometown to visit relatives. Because he has worked in other places for many years, he is used to speaking Mandarin. As a result, his father picked him: "When you go home, are you still bureaucratic with your father?" Going home again this year, he took the initiative to talk about his hometown dialect. Unexpectedly, the village chief blamed him again: "You have been gone for many years, why do you still speak dialects?" Now everyone in our village speaks Mandarin! The products of village-run enterprises have been sold to other provinces, and when people speak dialects, they will think that our products are not high in science and technology. "
Comment: Look at the value of Mandarin. The market economy has pushed the countryside to the forefront of modernization. Language is the second appearance of human beings. Modern farmers should have a modern language image and don't look at today's farmers with old eyes.
Fourth.
A prosecutor in Shanghai went to the northeast on business. When he checked in at the hotel, the receptionist at the front desk saw him wearing a uniform and asked him, "Is there a man?" The Shanghai guest was surprised and replied, "I have no housework." The waiter said, "Who asked if you had any housework? I mean, do you have a boyfriend? " The guest was angry: "My home is in Shanghai. What are the chores here? " ? Without rhyme or reason! "
Comment: Do you understand? "Guy" means "tools and weapons" in the northern dialect. The waiter asked the guest if he had a gun. If he has a gun, he must register. But she can't speak mandarin, and the guests in the south can't understand it. No wonder someone is angry.