At that time, I received many readers' replies, and I also talked about many people's hearts, because there are not a few such relatives, and they are deformed.
Actually, when it comes to family. It is a relationship that everyone can't avoid. They are the people closest to themselves, and all the memories of childhood should be their closest existence in the future.
However, there are many family ties now, which not only can't help, but become the source of personal troubles. In the name of family, they are doing "family kidnapping", which is different from "moral kidnapping" and even more uncomfortable and sad, because no matter what they do, they can't get good.
Not long ago, my mother told me about her friend Aunt Bai's house, which made me very sad.
Aunt Bai's family are two girls who have lived in the countryside with their parents since childhood. Aunt Bai is the eldest, so she has been responsible for taking care of her sister since she was a child. When I grow up, I come to work in the city, and part of my income is for my sister to study. In fact, this is understandable.
After that, my sisters graduated smoothly, worked and got married, but the life between the two sisters was completely different.
Compared with her sister's unfortunate marriage experience, Bai Yi not only married a good husband, but also knew how to love her and earn money. Moreover, the mother-in-law also cherishes her daughter-in-law, and she has a happy life that all women want.
Besides, Bai Yi can live a better life than her sister. She keeps her work and family life in order.
But this kind of good life not only didn't get my sister's sincere blessing, but made her feel selfish. She only knew how to live her own good life and didn't know how to help herself.
The conflict broke out in a house not long ago, and even their mothers began to complain about Bai Yi constantly, which made Bai Yi miserable.
Bai Yi had a house of 120 square meters before moving to the residential area where she lives now. Although it is an old house, it has a good location and is close to the city center. In this fourth-and fifth-tier city, it can be worth more than1million.
After moving, the house is not in a hurry to sell. At that time, it happened that my sister's old house was going to be rebuilt and she would get the demolition room, so she moved to Bai Yi's house, and her mother moved in with her second daughter.
Although Bai Yi doesn't live with her mother, she always remembers filial piety. She needs to get every penny and do as many things as her sister.
After the renovation of my sister's old house was completed, my sister actually said that she and her mother were used to living in this house, so she traded her "new house" for Bai Yi's "old house" and said, "I'm just too lazy to move, big sister. Trade-in will not lose money. "
Everyone with a discerning eye doesn't know that although my sister's old house is decorated with a new house, the actual use area is only 80 square meters. The most important thing is that the location of her home is not comparable to Bai Yi's old house. The price of this new house is not even half that of Bai Yi's old house.
So Bai Yi disagreed, which made her sister very angry. She said angrily, "Why are you so selfish? My mother is so old that you always let her move. Besides, I have taken care of my mother for so many years. Shouldn't you pay something? "
Mother was also brainwashed by her sister and was very angry with her eldest daughter for refusing to change rooms. She called Bai Yi a "baiwenhang" and gave birth to an evil obstacle.
However, Bai Yi also has many grievances. Before buying that house for her sister, she had withdrawn a lot of money. Even if my sister didn't mention it after the divorce, Bai Yi and his wife stopped mentioning it later.
Because of many things, although this old house was written in Bai Yi's name, it was actually bought by her husband. She didn't know how to tell her husband about changing rooms. Because no one was stupid, why did she give away 500,000 or 600,000 people for nothing?
However, in the face of aggressive sister and mother, Bai Yi is helpless.
If you give them the house, you can't explain it to your husband. No matter how gentle your husband is, he will definitely have his own ideas.
Instead of giving them the house, the phrase "selfish ghost, baiwenhang" also made Bai Yi extremely unhappy.
My mother said Bai Yi had severe asthma. She had just rested for a while before, and when she talked about it, she cried and it became more and more difficult to breathe. I don't know how to solve it in the end
Every family has a difficult experience, and it is always too late to stop. Many people will definitely say, "Since you have money, give it to your sister."
But it's not that simple. Whose money is not blown by the wind, how can you just give it away? If I go my own way, I can even imagine the emotional changes of Bai Yi and her husband and their impact on life. My sister and mother will still have more demands in the future. This is a bottomless pit of pain.
This incident actually reminds me of the characters in the two plays I saw last year. One is Su Mingyu in Everything is OK, and the other is Fan Meisheng in Ode to Joy.
Both women have never received any sympathy and care from their families since childhood. They have gained a firm foothold in the city by their own strength, but they are constantly being sucked by their families and kidnapped by "family". It seems that the meaning of their own life is for them, and if they live well, they are sorry. How similar Bai Yi's things are to them.
I can even feel Bai Yi's helplessness and pain when she heard her sister calling herself a "selfish ghost" and her mother calling herself a "baiwenhang". My sister who has been in love for half a lifetime, my mother who has been distressed for decades, finally made such an evaluation of herself, and how to understand that kind of heartache.
As a family, why do you do this? In the name of brotherhood, "kidnapping" one's own relatives, satisfying one's own demands and plundering the interests of others, once rejected or disagreed, will be scolded, vilified and attacked by the most vicious language immediately, as if everything he has done is a dream.
Does this so-called family really have the meaning of persistence?
Shen Jiake always said in You deserve a better life:
Family members, the closest people, depend on each other for warmth and tenderness, and also kidnap and hurt each other. Strangling the soul is even more suffocating and suffocating. Parents "kidnap" their children, and children "kidnap" their parents. This situation can be found everywhere.
However, your own desires and ambitions have to be realized by yourself.
Therefore, if some relationships are uncomfortable, they will be broken. Some family relationships are helpless and boring, so don't contact them. No one is born to owe others. If you really can't be treated well, let evil become the accumulation of each other. Don't treat me like the best bully.