Anyway, in the eyes of most people, marriage is not about having children.
When many women get married, they flaunt that they want a house and a bride price, because it is too hard for women to have children. They not only have to experience the risk of pregnancy, but also take care of them after giving birth.
In short, women pay too much for having children, so men should pay in advance, such as houses and bride price.
A marriage is almost equal to an ordinary family's business for 20 years. I don't know how many men are blocked from marriage by the threshold of house and bride price.
So if you don't have children, can a woman also have no bride price and house?
0 1, "I asked you how to get a bride price of 200,000 yuan? You can have children after marriage. Can you have children? "
A Liang is 26 years old and has been in love with his girlfriend Xiaoli for more than a year. Their relationship has always been very good. Recently, I started to talk about marriage, but I got stuck in the bride price.
Xiaoli said that when relatives get married, as long as their daughters get married, it will be a bride price of 200,000 yuan, so I hope A Liang can also give it to 200,000 yuan.
However, A Liang thinks that 200,000 pounds is too much. He just bought a house at home in order to get married. Now, let alone 200,000 yuan, even if he takes 6.5438+million yuan, he has to borrow it from his relatives.
So I hope Xiaoli can be considerate of their family and pay less bride price. After all, her family has bought a house and agreed to add Xiaoli's name to the real estate license.
But Xiaoli said, "The house is not mine. You can live by yourself in the future. Is the relationship between us so worthless? " You are not willing to give up the bride price of 200 thousand. "
A Liang thinks Xiaoli is very interesting. Obviously, she forced herself to take 200 thousand as a bride price, how to become indifferent to feelings.
So she asked Xiaoli, "Are you the one who doesn't pay attention to feelings? I can't afford 200 thousand now. Why can't you make way? "
Xiaoli retorted, "Why should I give in? What's wrong with asking you for 200 thousand bride price? You can have children after marriage. Is it okay? Do you know how difficult it is for women to have children? "
02. "If you don't have children, can you avoid the bride price?"
When it comes to the house and bride price when getting married, most of them will end with "women can have children".
When it comes to feelings, feelings are mutual, and men and women should pay and compromise each other in their feelings.
When it comes to marriage mode, modern marriage is no longer a woman marrying a man's house, and it is impossible for a woman to serve her in-laws.
When it comes to rights and obligations, gender equality is no longer just a slogan. In marriage, the obligations and rights of husband and wife are equal.
Only when it comes to having children, men have nothing to say, because men can't have children instead of women.
However, in a rage, A Liang heard Xiaoli drag the bride price to the issue of having children after marriage and said angrily, "Well, I don't ask you to have children. We can sign a prenuptial agreement, and you don't want a bride price or children. Nothing! "
Xiaoli never thought that A Liang would say this. She hesitated for a long time and said, "Are you sick? You don't want to be a father, I want to be a mother. You can't afford the bride price, why can't you deprive me of my reproductive rights? "
It is said that the bride price is because it is difficult to have children in the future, and it is impossible not to have children. A Liang and Xiao Li failed to get married because of the bride price.
03. Marriage requires mutual consent, and the bride price should be negotiable.
When getting married, men rarely "bargain" in the face of the bride price request put forward by the woman, and feel that they care about "hurting feelings" in the bride price.
If the bride price offered by the woman demands that the man can afford it, even if it is a little more, he will bite his teeth and agree. Few men directly discuss with their girlfriends whether the bride price requirement can be lowered like A Liang.
But there is nothing wrong with Liang's approach.
In the face of marriage, many people can understand the contribution of the woman and her parents, but few people pay attention to the contribution of the man's parents.
What modern marriage should really understand is the man's parents, especially the man's parents in ordinary families.
In counties and towns, many parents lend money to their sons to get married, and even lending money to their sons to get married has become a "convention".
Most of the money borrowed is paid back by these parents working.
As for paying back the money after marriage, don't even think about it. How can a daughter-in-law who can let her in-laws lend money to the bride price before marriage agree that her husband will pay back the money for her in-laws, even if the money is for her?
I just bought a house at home, and I can't get the 200 thousand bride price. What can A Liang do if he doesn't take the initiative to ask his girlfriend to reduce the bride price? Do you really have to rely on your parents to get married first, and then ask them to help you pay back the 200 thousand debt?
Do things with your heart. Many women think that men don't care about themselves because they don't want to give bride price and bargain with themselves.
In fact, if it is not really at the end of their tether, several men will pull their faces down to discuss the bride price with the woman.
04. The bride price should not be linked to having children.
Many women think that children are born for their husbands or in-laws, and often see similar remarks on the Internet: "If I had a choice, I would definitely not have children."
Do women really have no choice?
The answer is no. If you don't want children, you can choose not to get married, or find a husband who doesn't want children either.
When A Liang proposed not to have children if she didn't want the bride price, Xiaoli also refused.
In fact, it is true that most women resist having children, but if they really don't have children, it is still difficult to make up their minds.
Giving birth to a child is not only the husband's or in-laws', but also the children of his mother and grandparents. And no child wants to be the product of some kind of deal.
If you want a bride price, you need a bride price. Don't be linked to having children.