Some marriages deserve the care of both husband and wife, because both husband and wife are of one mind and face all the hardships and joys in life together; But some marriages have no need to continue from the beginning, because both husband and wife have no heart and no feelings at all. Even together, it is difficult to get along for a long time.
I remember someone once said that couples can get married before falling in love, and then at that stage, major TV dramas are also performing such a plot, which seems to give people the illusion that two people can really get married before falling in love.
In fact, I personally oppose this kind of TV series, because it will lead people to have a wrong view of marriage. Marriage, like feelings, pays attention to order, and there is no reason to get married before falling in love.
Because there are so many factors that can affect marriage, marriage will not give couples time to fall in love again. Give a popular example. After marriage, when couples face the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, should they deal with the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law while falling in love? It's unrealistic to think about it.
In addition to the thorny issue of the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, the relationship between young aunt will also affect the quality of marriage. The collision between the family of birth and his new family will make many couples feel helpless, especially those with emotional foundation, not to mention those without emotional foundation.
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In the face of this contradiction between family of origin and the new family, it is even more necessary for both husband and wife to work together to deal with it. I need to convince my family to keep a sense of boundaries. After all, I have formed a new family, and I shouldn't interfere as I used to.
Yuling has just been married to her husband Zhang Hao for half a year, and she knows that marriage is not easy to manage. Two people were originally college classmates, fell in love in college and chose to stay in the city after graduation.
Yuling is a native, while Zhang Hao is a foreigner. At that time, for love, Zhang Hao chose to stay. They got their wish, found their favorite job and formally entered the society.
Yuling is an only child, and her family is ok. After working for two years, her parents gave her a down payment to buy a house, and the parents were responsible for the loan. Zhang Hao's family is fine. He also has a younger sister, who was at school and was two years younger than him. Parents like this little girl very much.
Both parents know and agree that they are together and want to get married after their jobs are stable.
-03-
Yuling thinks that she and Zhang Hao have an emotional foundation. Although both sides have shortcomings, they are both tolerant. Married will be very happy, so in the third year of work, two people got married.
Zhang Haojia bought a house and gave Yuling a bride price. The Yuling family is responsible for the decoration of the house, and both families are very happy. The marriage went very well.
After getting married, they live together because they are both young people. They don't cook much on weekdays, they always order takeout and seldom clean up at home. They didn't clean up until the last straw. It may seem strange to outsiders, but both of them like this state of life very much.
But in the eyes of the elderly, this is not life, it is just like sharing. Zhang Hao's mother and son found the whole house in chaos in the video, and they expressed their dissatisfaction. They think that marrying a daughter-in-law is to take care of the family and husband, but Yuling can't cook and doesn't want to clean up the house, which makes her mother-in-law complain a lot.
So after getting married for half a year, her mother-in-law came uninvited and said that she would stay for a while and educate Yuling how to be a qualified wife.
It was also at that time that Zhang Hao's sister got a job after graduation and lived in the same city as Zhang Hao. Also stay at home for the time being.
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There are so many people in the original two-person world at once, which makes Yuling somewhat unaccustomed. When she knew the purpose of her mother-in-law's coming home, she was also very uncomfortable. In my own home, I can do whatever I want. How can we let an outsider take care of it?
In this way, there was a gap between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law from the beginning, and they also had contradictions after getting along for a long time. In addition, sister-in-law helped her mother make things difficult for Yuling, and poor Yuling suddenly felt the double pressure of the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. It was also at that moment that she deeply felt that marriage was not as beautiful as expected.
Fortunately, Zhang Hao usually helps her, but her mother-in-law and sister-in-law don't give her any further trouble.
My sister-in-law moved out after living at home for less than half a year and talked about a boyfriend. They are making rapid progress and are going to get married within six months. Her mother-in-law stayed at home and let her daughter get married.
Afterwards, Yuling learned that her sister-in-law got married so soon because she was pregnant and was married by Fengzi. My mother-in-law has been sighing because of this incident, thinking that her daughter should not marry this man. Now there is nothing she can do but agree.
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In order to take care of her daughter, her mother-in-law decided to stay. Yuling's heart is going to collapse because it is too painful to get along with her mother-in-law. She has been trying to be patient, trying not to go home on weekdays, going home after work, and then going straight back to the house, trying not to contact and talk with her mother-in-law. This can ensure that there will be no quarrel between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law
Time passed quickly, and my sister-in-law gave birth to a child and a son. Yuling's mother-in-law took her daughter back to Yuling's home for confinement. Now Yuling's home is more lively.
And little sister-in-law is not a good crop. After she moved in, she even occupied the master bedroom, saying that she had just given birth to a child and wanted to sleep in an air-conditioned room. Only the master bedroom has air conditioning, so she directly occupies the master bedroom.
Yuling is angry. This is her own home, and her sister-in-law didn't know any manners, so she threw herself out of the master bedroom. So she refused directly and asked her sister-in-law to move out quickly.
Yuling accused her of saying, "This is my home. You have no home. Would you please be polite? "
Unexpectedly, my sister-in-law replied directly: "This is my brother's house. You just married an outsider in my family. My mother is in charge of my family. You are an outsider! "
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Yuling was even more angry after hearing this, so she quarreled with her sister-in-law, and her mother-in-law joined in. Three people quarreled. Finally, when Zhang Hao came home, she told her mother and sister that her sister-in-law had moved out of the master bedroom.
Zhang Hao has always sympathized with Yuling. His family has been bothering him, and he can't say much. After all, it is his mother and sister. So I can only comfort Yuling.
Yuling knows that marriage is not as beautiful as she imagined. Fortunately, her husband is a person who can handle it clearly, and she will not be worse.
There is an emotional foundation between husband and wife, so dealing with some marital conflicts will get twice the result with half the effort. Therefore, before getting married, we must cultivate good feelings, carefully understand each other's advantages and disadvantages, and more importantly, understand each other's family situation, so as to know ourselves and know ourselves.