How to get rid of the sadness and pain brought by emotions

First of all, don't blame yourself. After the failure of love and marriage, many people blame themselves for being "stupid", "too simple and naive" and "how can they have a crush on such a person without long eyes". Love is a very complicated emotion, and choosing and managing love is a very complicated process. Besides, we are all young and lack of life experience. There is no experience to learn from choosing love and managing love, and mistakes in understanding and choice will inevitably occur. This is normal. There is no need to blame yourself too much, and there is no need to punish yourself with other people's mistakes. We should face up to our own failures, learn lessons seriously, see our own shortcomings in introspection and mature in reflection. Second, don't be disgusted. To love and be loved is the basic right of human beings, and neither to love nor to accept the love of others is also the basic right of human beings. Everyone has the freedom to choose love. If the other person feels that you are no longer his/her love, that you are not the life partner he/she wants to choose, and that living with you can't bring him/her the happiness he/she needs and pursues, then he/she can make his/her own choice, which is understandable. You should understand and respect his/her decision and give him/her more tolerance and understanding. Love is selfish and great. Since you love him/her, you should regard his/her happiness and happiness as your own happiness, and sincerely wish him/her a happy life, instead of blindly blaming him/her for heartlessness or even deep resentment, because the resentment accumulated in your heart can only make you restless and angry, and increase your troubles and pains. Of course, those who are irresponsible and play with others' feelings should be condemned by conscience and whipped by morality. Again, don't give up. Love is a matter for both sides, and it is not good to "shave while carrying a load". Only when two people devote themselves wholeheartedly to love can they produce and sublimate their feelings, get a good feeling and enjoy happiness and happiness. "Twisted melon is not sweet", since the other person no longer loves you, or can't continue to love you for some reason, what's the point of pestering this relationship? If you give up, you will get it. If you give up the love that no longer belongs to you, you will get a chance to choose love again. Give up the love that has become the past and you will get new feelings. In this world, only feelings are the hardest to give up and the most difficult to break. It is really painful to give up a relationship that once brought you happiness and happiness, but long-term pain is better than short-term pain. He/she is so heartless to you, which shows that he/she is no longer worthy of your love. Since we are no longer in love, it is not a good thing to leave early. Otherwise, it may bring endless troubles and affect the happiness and happiness of a lifetime. There are so many beautiful things in the world that we can't get them if we don't love them, and we can't get them if we insist on what doesn't belong to you. We should treat the failure of our marriage and love with an open-minded attitude, relax, take it lightly, enjoy today with a sunny mood and look forward to tomorrow. Fourth, don't feel cheated. One of the reasons why I can't get rid of the pain after the failure of marriage and love is that I feel that I have lost too much, suffered losses, invested too much emotion, wasted my youth, and even sacrificed my most precious chastity, but I was finally abandoned. It's really hard. I want to cry. In fact, there is no problem for both sides who love each other. We can look at it this way. If you are in love, he/she is in love, otherwise you won't love him/her so much. You wasted your youth, and he/she spent the same time as you; You gave the most precious chastity, and he/she also gave his/her body and mind, and everyone enjoyed it together. As for the payment of money and things, you don't have to calculate this account. Money is a thing outside the body, and there is no regret in giving it up. Fifth, don't immerse yourself in painful memories. Life is irreversible, just one day away, and one day will push you to death. No "just visiting" like science fiction movies can send us back to the past and let us start over. Life is too short for us to enjoy. What we pursue is happiness and happiness. It is really not worthwhile and unnecessary to bear the pain of the past all your life. Things are a thing of the past, pain is the pain of the past, and all regrets and sighs are of no help. It is sad, pitiful and stupid to torture yourself with the pain of the past. Therefore, we should grasp today with a positive attitude and don't always recall the pain of the past. When the pain of the past hits our hearts, we will consciously take the form of doing sports, listening to music, doing housework and chatting with friends. To divert our thoughts, control our emotions and make ourselves optimistic. After a long time, the pain of the past will be forgotten and we will walk out of our prison. Sixth, don't lose confidence in love. People who have a history of failed marriage and love often have some "fear of marriage and love" and "once bitten, twice shy". They think that there are few good men/women in the world, and they are all insincere, untrustworthy and unreliable. As a result, their hearts are cold, they lose confidence in getting true love, dare not love again, dare not accept love again, and feel very distressed. In fact, there are still many good people in the world, and there are also many good men/women who attach great importance to their feelings. Otherwise, we can't explain why many couples are so loving and many families are so happy. Therefore, if you want to get out of the emotional misunderstanding in the past, you must face love bravely, dare to love, dare to accept love, warm your cold heart with love, heal the wounds of the past with affection, get out of the shadow of love as soon as possible and enjoy the happiness of love. Seventh, don't compare before and after. People who fall in love again and remarry often subconsciously compare his/her present with his/her past, especially compare his/her shortcomings with his/her past advantages. The more we compare, the more we feel that he/she is not as good as he/she used to be, which leads to dissatisfaction, blame and emotional decline. At the same time, it is bound to make him/her dissatisfied with you and indifferent to feelings, resulting in a new emotional crisis. No one is perfect, everyone has his own advantages, and love can't be completely blamed, let alone compare one's shortcomings with another's advantages. Since we are in love again, we should completely break away from the past, cherish him/her now, discover and stimulate his/her advantages more, help him/her correct his/her shortcomings, and develop the regained love through mutual love, mutual understanding and mutual assistance.