Speaking of bride price, I think it is acceptable as long as the amount is within a reasonable range and does not harm the fundamental interests of the man. The man takes out some money moderately to show that it represents a kind of respect and attention to the woman and an attitude towards marriage.
Of course, many people in life feel that asking for a bride price violates the principle of equality between men and women and infringes on the interests of men. It is precisely because of this concept that some people are still worried about giving bride price even after entering marriage life.
I remember at a party, a man spoke bluntly about his wife. He said, "I didn't expect to marry a daughter-in-law who doesn't like work. I really envy those men who didn't spend a penny on the bride price and their daughter-in-law worked hard. "
From this colleague's words, it is not hard to hear that in his mind, he thinks that his wife should work hard after marriage, otherwise he will lose money.
In fact, there are many people who have the same idea as him in life. From the beginning, they felt that it was extremely unfair to pay the bride price, and finally compromised for various reasons. But the bride price after marriage became a knot in their hearts, which made him want to get compensation in marriage.
Xiao Xia, who will be mentioned below, met such a man in her extremely short marriage.
02.
Xiao Xia and this man first met in a fast food restaurant. It was not a beautiful encounter, but a blind date introduced by an intermediary.
At that time, Xiao Xia was 27 years old. She had only been in love for more than two years before and has been single ever since. At this age, both Xiao Xia and Xiao Xia's parents had a sense of urgency, so they started dating.
This blind date is the only time for Xiao Xia. It's not that Xiao Xia has a crush on each other on blind date, but that Xiao Xia doesn't have much emotional experience, so although she doesn't have much strong feelings, she doesn't know how to refuse, just want to look around.
And this person seems to be very satisfied with Xiao Xia. After all, Xiao Xia is not bad in all aspects, and its work and income are stable. So after the blind date, the man began to contact Xiao Xia assiduously, as if he were looking for it.
After a period of contact, Xiao Xia knew that this man was all right, had no bad habits, had a good job and income, and was very filial to his parents. The only drawback is that he cares about money, and dating Xiao Xia can also save money.
Although it is said that when two people are in contact, this shortcoming makes Xiao Xia feel very wronged, but I think that if they get married and live together in the future, this shortcoming may be good, and Xiao Xia will be relieved.
03.
In this way, the communication between the two people did not make much waves, and more than half a year passed quickly. Because of their age, the two sides began to discuss marriage. After all, at this age, they naturally want to get married and have children early.
When discussing the details of the wedding, Xiao Xia's family actually didn't ask too much, and everything was arranged by the man's family. In the eyes of Xiao Xia's parents, as long as Xiao Xia can get married as soon as possible and create her own happiness, her parents will be very satisfied.
In the face of marriage, Xiao Xia didn't ask too much, and she was obedient to the arrangement of wedding scene, dress and process. Xiao Xia's only proposal is to give parents a bride price before marriage. The amount doesn't need much, not less than 30 thousand yuan.
Arguably, in the local area, the bride price of 30 thousand is really nothing, and the average family often gets married between 80 thousand and 1500. For the man's family, 30,000 yuan is not a problem at all and will not hurt their interests.
However, the man showed great reluctance to the bride price. He persuaded Xiao Xia to cancel this request more than once, and said to Xiao Xia with great dissatisfaction: "Marriage is not a sale. Why do you have to pay for what you want? Giving a bride price is unreasonable in itself. I'm not buying a wife. "
But even so, Xiao Xia didn't change his request. In Xiao Xia's view, this is not only a man's business, but also an explanation to parents when they get married. It doesn't need much, but it won't work without it. What's more, if you don't do this, it is likely that many people will say that you are "in a hurry" and will be laughed at instead.
04.
Finally, regarding the bride price, at Xiao Xia's insistence, the man's family accepted the request and paid the bride price according to the minimum requirements given by Xiao Xia before marriage.
After paying the bride price, the man's attitude towards Xiao Xia became much colder, and he made no secret of his dissatisfaction. In this regard, Xiao Xia thought it was only a temporary emotion. After all, the other party usually values money. Xiao Xia believes that after marriage, the other party will naturally relax and will not have a bad influence on marriage.
However, the result is different from what Xiao Xia thought. In the end, it was because of this 30,000 yuan bride price that Xiao Xia saw each other's attitude and pattern clearly and made her choose a divorce.
Specifically, it is like this. When I didn't know Xiao Xia, this man bought a house long ago for fear that house prices would rise again, but he never decorated it. Xiao Xia married this man in a hurry, so he didn't have a new house, so he decided to vacate a house in this man's parents' house as a new one.
On the wedding day, although the process is very simplified, it is busy from the early morning, which makes the bride and groom very tired. It was not until midnight that all relatives and friends left one after another, leaving only the bride and groom, and everyone hurried to rest.
On the second day of the wedding, the bride Xiao Xia got up very late, thinking that there would be a ready-made breakfast after getting up. After all, she just walked in the door, but she didn't, and the room was messy the day before, and no one cleaned it.
05.
At this time, Xiao Xia didn't think too much. After all, everyone had worked hard the day before, so he set about cleaning up. At this time, my in-laws also came out of the room, exchanged a few commonplaces with the bride Xiao Xia, and sat in the living room watching TV.
No one cooked until the little summer was almost cleaned. So he tentatively asked the groom if he wanted to cook something to eat. As a result, the groom directly asked Xiao Xia, the bride who didn't know the kitchen layout at all, to prepare breakfast.
No way, since she got married, she had to deal with housework sooner or later. Xiao Xia went to the kitchen without much thought, cooking and groping for the decoration of the kitchen. It didn't take long for a simple meal to be cooked.
After dinner, the family still sat back to the original place to rest, and all the things were handed over to Xiao Xia, and no one stepped in to help. At this time, Xiao Xia was unbalanced and felt something was wrong.
This day soon arrived in the evening. Xiao Xia always cooked three meals and washed dishes three times, and sorted out a lot of things left over from marriage in the middle. Of course, all this was done by Xiao Xia alone, and the groom and his parents-in-law seldom talked.
After all this, Xiao Xia sat on the sofa and rested, thinking about what happened this day, watching the groom's father-in-law watch TV, and her mother-in-law soaked her feet, and her dissatisfaction became more and more serious.
06.
However, before long, Xiao Xia said nothing. The groom looked at his mother-in-law, who had soaked her feet, turned to Xiao Xia and said, "Go and help her pour the foot washing water."
Hearing this, the bride Xiao Xia did not move. In fact, it's no big deal to pour foot washing water, but it's like the last straw to crush everything. Xiao Xia's discontent and anger became uncontrollable at the moment. So Xiao Xia said to the groom, "Did I marry you to be a nanny for your family?"
At this time, the groom seemed to have been waiting for this sentence for a long time, and excitedly shouted to Xiao Xia, "You're not here to be a nanny, so what money do you need for your work? Don't forget that I spent money! "
Xiao Xia was so angry that he felt funny and asked the groom, "Why do you want to get married if you don't want to spend money?" The groom didn't speak for a moment. Obviously, he himself knows that he has taken advantage of others. Except Xiao Xia, maybe no woman wants to marry him for 30,000 yuan, but he still doesn't want to accept such a thing.
The two later quarreled a lot. Xiao Xia also clearly saw this person's narrowness. Finally, he took out his mobile phone and transferred 30 thousand yuan to the other party. He told the other party directly that the deposit he brought was far more than that, and then he packed up and went back to her house.
Since then, the man's family has tried many times to recover, but Xiao Xia insisted on ending the marriage. In the end, the man and his family didn't want to delay too much time, so they divorced Xiao Xia a few months later, and the two families became strangers from now on.
07.
The above is the story of Xiao Xia's divorce due to bride price. Maybe everyone has different views on who is right and who is wrong.
Some people may say that Xiao Xia's result is still due to too little bride price. If you get enough, then men won't dare to despise it. Some people also say that the bride price should not be asked, otherwise there would be no such unnecessary contradiction.
Actually, I don't think this has much to do with the bride price. Even if Xiao Xia wants more or less, this marriage will not be happy, because the man she met is doomed.
From his initial attitude towards the bride price, we can see that there is something wrong with his pattern and mentality. Later, when he got married, he vented his dissatisfaction on the other side, which showed that he didn't understand the meaning of marriage and how to run it. Even if such a man lives with him, he can't bring real happiness to women.