First, be familiar with the environment.
For everyone, the living environment is constantly changing. In order to adapt to the new environment, on the one hand, we should be psychologically prepared, on the other hand, we should constantly adjust our mentality to accept and adapt to the new environment, otherwise we will be troubled by the new environment and be distressed by many maladjustments. When children enter high school from junior high school, they leave the familiar learning environment and go to a strange and brand-new environment. This brand-new environment will put a lot of question marks in their hearts: how is the new school? What about the teacher? What kind of classmates will you meet? Can my good friend in junior high school be in my class? Will the new teacher like me as a junior high school teacher? ..... and so on. The existence of these question marks will invisibly increase the pressure on children's psychology and make them anxious. In order to eliminate the question mark in children's minds and let them have basic psychological preparation for the life of senior one, parents should help their children to do four things before entering school: the first is to accompany their children to think about the high school they went to, and at the same time understand the geographical location of the school, focusing on the environment and facilities around the school and feeling the conditions of running the school, so that children can have a preliminary understanding of the overall teaching environment of the new school and eliminate the strangeness of entering school; The second thing is to accompany the children to visit the teachers of Grade One, understand the curriculum of Grade One, the difficulty of each subject, and the basic requirements for students' study, and consult the material preparation and psychological preparation of senior high school students in detail, so that the children can have a basic understanding of the learning environment of Grade One and eliminate blind obedience; The third thing is to accompany the children to visit the students who have been in Grade One, and let them introduce their experiences and learning experiences in getting along with the students in Grade One, so that the children can be psychologically prepared to get along with strangers, arrange their studies reasonably and eliminate their anxiety; The reason why parents are required to accompany their children in the above three things is because parents should also know about these aspects, so as to help their children solve related problems in a reasonable way. The fourth thing is to sort out the information obtained from the first three things with your child, and make careful analysis and thinking in combination with your child's actual situation, so that your child can know what to prepare. Among them, in terms of material preparation, children should be prepared (such as books, notebooks, stationery, toiletries and their daily necessities), and parents should be prepared (such as quilts and mattresses) to consciously cultivate children's self-management ability, because he is facing the reality of collective life away from home, and poor management will also have a certain psychological impact on children. In terms of psychological preparation, first listen to the child's thoughts, which aspects he feels less stressed and which aspects he is worried or stressed. Then, communicate with children in a targeted manner, suggest and encourage children to eliminate worries and concerns. For example, say to children, "Baby, believe in yourself, and all these aspects will be fine." "My baby is never afraid of difficulties, so mom (dad) believes you!" "Mom and Dad give you motivation with all their love, baby, no problem!" Wait a minute. Let children solve their anxiety in the deep love of their parents, so that children can easily or prepared to invest in the learning environment of senior one.
Second, timely communication.
Compared with junior high school, both knowledge content and learning activities in senior high school have undergone significant changes. As far as learning activities are concerned, in junior high school, the teacher speaks in detail and gives careful guidance, so students are more dependent on the teacher. In senior high school, teachers have higher requirements for students' self-learning ability. Teachers talk less and let students learn more by themselves. Every student should choose a suitable learning method according to the actual situation, so that students can have certain independent thinking ability, good reading comprehension ability and strong analytical and comprehensive ability. For this kind of change, it is difficult for ordinary children to adapt in a short time, and their mood will be very upset. If it can't be corrected in time, it will affect children's learning mood, and then affect their academic performance. If the contrast of children's academic performance in junior high school drops too much, it will bring greater psychological pressure to children, make them fall into an anxious state, and seriously make them lose confidence in learning. In order to adjust children's uncomfortable mentality in time, accept the reality they face as soon as possible, and integrate into the new learning environment, parents should communicate with their children in time when school starts, understand their understanding and feelings about teachers and learning, and give them some suggestions and opinions in a targeted manner. The most suitable time is in the first weekend, because in the first week, children have not yet come out of the original learning environment and are very sensitive to the new environment. They will consciously or unconsciously compare high school and junior high school everywhere. Comparatively speaking, their thoughts will fluctuate greatly. In addition, in a week's time, the children came into contact with all the courses offered and had a preliminary feeling about the content and difficulty of the subject. At the same time, all the teachers also appeared on the stage. Therefore, when communicating with children at this time, children will say a lot of feelings, and it is easy to find their psychological crux. In the process of communication, parents should pay attention to three points: first, create a relaxed, harmonious, pleasant and natural communication environment, and avoid being very serious and serious, which will make children nervous and unwilling to show their true feelings; Second, we should concentrate on listening to the children, and don't interrupt or interrupt the children easily, which will mislead them; Third, like friends, communicate with children in an equal and cordial manner. If children are satisfied and adapt to the new environment, parents should encourage them and cheer for them! If the child feels uncomfortable in the new environment, while giving the child the necessary comfort, discuss the solutions to the existing problems with the child, give the child some opinions and suggestions that the child is willing to accept, avoid complaining and accusing, and say something that hurts the child's heart, such as "You are not good at this!" "Don't expect to be admitted to the university like you!" "Junior high school is good. Why have you regressed? " Wait a minute. In this way, the child will feel that his parents care about his grades, whether he can be admitted to the university in the future, and don't care about him at all. Not only can it not solve the pressure in children's hearts, but it will make children more troubled, so they are no longer willing to communicate with their parents.
Third, guidance at any time.
Professor Ding Zan, a famous psychologist in China, once said: "The most important thing for people's psychological adaptation is their adaptation to interpersonal relationships, so people's psychological diseases are mainly caused by the imbalance of interpersonal relationships." Children entering high school not only means entering a brand-new learning and living environment, but also means entering a new interpersonal relationship that is more complicated and competitive than junior high school. Adapting and mastering interpersonal relationships is a very difficult thing for children who have just entered senior one and lack experience. For example, communication with classmates, the opposite sex and teachers often puzzles their sensitive hearts. Often at this time, children will show irritability, anxiety, less words and more worries. Therefore, interpersonal problems are also an important factor that disturbs children's learning emotions. As a parent, if you find that your child has this problem, you should strengthen guidance in time through conversation. When having a heart-to-heart talk, pull the child to the side, hold the child's hand, let the child feel the warm love of his mother (father), and at the same time kindly say to the child, "Baby, does your mother (father) find that you seem to have something to tell your mother (father)? Mom (dad) is your loyal listener. " In this way, the child will have the impulse to speak, and then take out the words in his heart. After listening to the child's talk, in addition to the necessary comfort, you should also give the child some guidance in principle according to your own experience. Don't expect such a problem to be solved in one heart-to-heart talk. When the old contradictions are solved, new contradictions will occur again. Find them at any time and solve them at any time. But remember one thing, that is, don't always ask your child this question, which will strengthen your child's problems in this area and make your child more nervous and anxious. The best way is for parents to behave themselves to their children, and at the same time, make some infiltration in this aspect in family conversation, so that children can learn from their experiences imperceptibly.
Third, targeted.
For children who have just entered high school, there are not only problems that they can't adapt to the external environment and interpersonal relationships, but also problems that how to adapt themselves and correctly evaluate themselves. The concrete manifestation is: (1) blind superiority. It turns out that top students in junior high school also think that high school can't be wrong, ignoring the reality that top students in high school gather. Such children, once they find that their grades are no longer dominant, will doubt their abilities and start to be nervous and anxious. The more so, the less ideal their grades will be, and they will have negative, escapist and self-doubt psychological behaviors in the face of reality. (2) Have the idea of breathing a sigh of relief. Children feel too hard and tired in the intense study of grade three, especially before the exam. Being admitted to high school can be regarded as achieving their goals. As for going to college, it was three years later. Therefore, if you want to relax first, you must have more interest in entertainment (or network) and relax, not active, not active in learning. (3) Stick to the original learning method. Children can enter high school and should be said to be good students in junior high school. Some children think that the learning method in junior high school is successful. After high school, they constantly adjust their learning methods without considering new learning needs. For these, parents should conduct targeted guidance according to their children's situation. If the child is in the first case, parents should inspire and induce the child by borrowing from others, so that he can understand that "there is a mountain outside the mountain" and "there is a sky outside", guide the child to find his own position in the new group, and determine the goal of his efforts according to his own position; If the child is in the second case, parents should use the method of "beating about the bush" to remind the child that as time goes by, knowledge is slipping away quietly and it is difficult to get it back. For example, say to the child, "Oh, my baby is exhausted in junior high school, and it will be even more bitter in high school." (Let the children feel the understanding and sympathy of their parents) But I believe my baby will continue to work hard. (Give children psychological hints) Mom (Dad) will continue to be your fans and cheer for you! Humor will dilute the pressure from parents, and children will accept it easily) "; If the child is in the third situation, parents can advise the child to consult the teacher, and under the guidance of the teacher, summarize and reflect on the incompatibility between the past learning methods and the current learning requirements, correct them in time, and seek more practical and effective learning methods and strategies.
Fourth, make the best use of the situation.
After the first year of high school, parents are disgusted with their children watching TV and surfing the Internet. They think that children are not self-motivated and don't know how to study in a hurry, so they nag every day, or they turn off the TV or computer angrily as soon as they turn it on. Turn off the power if you don't listen, or even beat and scold. In short, the handling method is simple and rude. Not only can this not fundamentally solve the problem, but children will have a strong rebellious mentality, which will alienate their parents and retaliate against their parents for not studying hard. This is a dangerous signal that leads to children's learning failure. The best way is to meet this situation. Parents should make the best use of the situation. Children like watching TV. Parents can advise their children to watch some TV programs to broaden their knowledge, such as social and legal channels, news and international channels. These programs are very important for high school students, because they are favorable channels for children to dabble in society and collect information, which books can't learn. At first, children who love watching TV dramas may not be used to it and are not interested. Parents should take time out to watch with their children. They can let children express their views and comments on the content of the program while watching it, and praise and encourage children's unique opinions in time. In this way, children will gradually shift their interest in watching TV dramas to more beneficial programs. If children like to play online, parents can teach their children some network or computer skills, such as how to access information, how to draw pictures, how to draw and process images, etc. Through "taking children as teachers". This indirectly rejected the child's request to play online games, effectively weakening the child's interest in the game. At the same time, you can also start a blog with your child, which can not only exercise your child's writing, but also open up a space for your child to talk without psychological pressure, so that children's emotions such as emotions can be expressed by writing a diary, which is also a good way of self-guidance and self-adjustment.
In short, children are under great psychological pressure in high school. What parents should do is to create a warm, relaxed and calm family environment for their children, be their bosom friends and give them praise and encouragement when they get good grades. When children encounter difficulties, comfort and encourage them and give them enough confidence and courage. Let children spend the key learning stage of life in the love of their parents!