Someone went to the laboratory, and the nurse pointed to a sign in front and said that non-undergraduate personnel were not allowed to enter. The visitor was furious and scolded, "I'll take a urine test and get a fucking bachelor's degree."
Do your ears itch? That means I'm thinking about you! Do your eyes itch? I want to see you! Does your mouth itch? That means I want to kiss you! Does your body itch? This means ... forget it, you have lice, go take a shower!
If we go back in time, we will all go back to childhood. I will definitely come to play with you, play hide-and-seek with you, make you cry, and then pat your little face to make you laugh. Then I'll hit you ...
I admit I can't catch up with you, there are so many people chasing you! Well, I'm definitely hopeless. Some things can't be forced. Forget it, give the opportunity to others. Whoever catches up with you will kill the people anyway. You still run, dead mouse.
One day, during a meeting in the Dragon Palace, Prime Minister Turtle took out an object from his pocket, looked at it and put it back. The dragon king asked him what he was looking at. There was silence. The soldier and the crab whispered, "The old bastard got the news again!
I am willing to let you lie in my palm; I would like to feel you melt into a delicate and sweet foam in my mouth; Wake up every morning, I can't live without you ... damn it! Going to buy toothpaste again!
Busy? Nothing, just want to tell you that I miss you in a way that doesn't bother you! I hope that when you receive this message, you will smile at your mouth, arch your nose and hum twice to let other pigs know that your master likes you best!
On our friendship journey, sometimes you can't see me by your side. It's not that I forgot you, much less. But I choose to walk behind you. When you accidentally fall, I will run ... step on my foot. ...
I won't miss you because of the changing seasons, and I won't forget you because I'm busy. How are you doing in the zoo? Did the tiger bully you? Did the lion scare you? The monkey didn't rob your food, did he? Are you still used to reading text messages with your mobile phone in both feet?
I haven't heard from you for a long time I wonder if you are all right now. I passed by your house the other day and went in to have a look. I saw you asleep, and I didn't have the heart to wake you up. Hey, only you have a litter of pigs!
I beg the Buddha for a long-lasting blooming rose every day. When it reaches 999, I will give it to you together and say with emotion, "Little son, I don't believe that the attracted bees won't sting you!" "
A catty and a half of Erguotou, a two-year-old veteran in love, a three-year-old beggar, a gambler and a smoker, and a four-year-old liar and thief. This man is young and promising, and his IQ is low when he grows up. Knowing that this man is you, he will stick to it. Admire! Admire!
Look at the bank abbreviation: China Construction Bank CBC (deposit or not? ) Bank of China BC (No deposit! ) Agricultural Bank of China Agricultural Bank of China (Oh, don't save! ) ICBC (love to save) Minsheng CMSB (save silly waves? )
If I were a fox and you were a hunter, would you chase me? If I were tea and you were boiling water, would you soak me? If I were a car and you were a driver, would you drive me? If you are money and I am a passbook, I will definitely take yours.
If a drop of water falls from the sky, it is a tear I miss you; If two drops of water fall from the sky, it is that I love you and am ecstatic; If there are countless water drops in the sky, it is … stop dreaming, it's raining!
1. Have you eaten? Please receive the short message. The elephant put shit in the middle of the road, and an ant just passed by. Looking up at the misty mountain peak, it couldn't help singing: Alasao, this is the Qinghai-Tibet Plateau!
2. The lion and the bear shit by the tree respectively. A month later, the lion found that the tree next to his excrement was thicker than that of the bear, so he said a philosophy full of vicissitudes-lion excrement is better than bear excrement!
You are always farting in the office, and your colleagues can't help asking if you can keep quiet. Then I saw you sitting there shivering and asked what you were doing, and you replied that I was shaking!
4. Have you heard of it? Looking back 500 times in previous lives, I brushed it in this life. Close friends like you and me, it seems that they didn't do anything in their last life, so they fucking turned back!
5. The three most popular words during the Iraq war: peace and war. Find it, connect these three English words, read them aloud for three times, and you will uncover a major historical mystery.
6. Psychological test: If you feel that your IQ is quite high, press it if you feel humorous, press it if you feel attractive, and press it if you feel handsome. Test results: quite shameless.
7. I see vicissitudes in your brow, confidence in your eyes, years on your forehead and leeks between your lips and teeth. Go brush your teeth!
8. Eat shit, eat shit, eat shit, eat shit, eat shit, eat shit, eat shit, eat shit, eat shit, eat shit, eat shit, eat shit, eat shit.
9.nHZ！ I fucking know you can't guess or understand, so take a closer look! Still can't see it? Do you know Pinyin? There is a limit to your stupidity, right? Turn the phone upside down!
Xiaoming lost a leg in a car accident. SMS 2: Xiaoming lost his other leg in another car accident. SMS 3: Xiaoming lost another leg in the third car accident. SMS 4: It's not over yet. Xiaoming lost a leg in the fourth car accident. SMS 5: I don't understand. In fact, Xiao Ming is a dog!