Yuan Fangfang, 30, is stepping into the ranks of older women, but she is optimistic that a 30-year-old girl is not old at all.
I say this because Yuan Fangfang is relatively small, with a height of 158 and a petite figure.
However, she is beautiful and exquisite. How can I describe her? If people don't know her, they won't guess her real age at all. She looks like 25 years old.
Fangfang has only talked about one boyfriend, and her emotional experience is very simple. Her boyfriend is a college classmate and has been together for less than two years. At that time, Fangfang stayed in her hometown and her boyfriend went to work in a coastal company.
As a result, the two began a long-distance relationship, and all the problems faced by long-distance couples were faced by her and her boyfriend. At first, my boyfriend was moved by Fangfang, but later he became a little impatient.
The two often had a cold war, and then they broke up peacefully when they couldn't talk.
Fangfang didn't find a boyfriend again, so she devoted herself to her work. Now, she has changed from a small civilian to a small leader of a department. In terms of salary, she has doubled, and now she can get nearly 20 thousand.
This condition is nothing if it is placed in a coastal city, but in my hometown, it has surpassed many peers.
Moreover, Fangfang's family is also good. Both parents have work units, and the family also bought her a separate house.
So Fangfang is more selective in making boyfriends. In her opinion, she has good economic conditions and must find a matching marriage partner.
Moreover, Yuan Fangfang never felt very picky. She said that this is normal. Girls have good conditions. Why do you have to reluctantly accept boys with poor conditions?
Then, many people around introduced Fangfang, but Fangfang disagreed. The main reason is that the man's economic foundation can't meet her standards.
Yuan Fangfang's criteria for choosing a spouse are also very simple: no bride price, but the man's annual salary must be above 500,000 and his age must not exceed 35.
Although Fangfang thinks this condition is not high, there are not many men who can meet the annual salary of 500 thousand in their hometown.
In this way, until now almost thirty years old, Yuan Fangfang has not found a really suitable object.
At the end of September this year, another person introduced Yuan Fangfang. The introducer said that the man was only 26 years old, good-looking and never had a girlfriend. He is a good potential stock, and I want Fangfang to meet him.
Yuan Fangfang thought about it and told her parents about it. Then her parents said that as long as men have potential and good character, they should not care too much about the current economic conditions.
So Yuan Fangfang went to see the man.
It should be said that Fangfang has a good impression of boys. She later told me that the man was really handsome and very shy. So they never had a girlfriend. He didn't even dare to look at her.
Yuan Fangfang chatted with the boys, and the two sides got a general idea. Everything else is ok, except that the salary of that boy is really too low.
The boy is an office worker. After graduating from college, he entered a company. He is just a small clerk with a salary of 5 thousand.
Although the boy said that he was a technician, it was only a matter of time before his salary was raised, but Yuan Fangfang felt hopeless. How high can the wages of skilled workers be?
So, Yuan Fangfang said to the boys: Why don't you find a job with development potential? Your salary is too low, you can't live on it. It is definitely not enough to get married and have children in the future.
The boy is a little embarrassed and says, it's a little low now, but he's leading the team. He will be in charge of the technical department in the future. Just get through it.
Yuan Fangfang doesn't think so. She said, when will this wait? Three years? Five years? What girl can wait that long?
The boy assured Yuan Fangfang: If you agree to associate, I will definitely work harder and try to get the title as soon as possible, and then the salary and benefits will be good.
Yuan Fangfang was a little disappointed. Although she has a good impression on boys, she is worried at the thought of living without money in the future.
Therefore, Fangfang said to him: It's really a bit difficult. I can't bet my happiness on you, because your conditions are really bad now. It is really unrealistic to marry such a poor wife.
The boy was particularly uncomfortable after listening to it. He waited for a long time before he got up the courage to say: Is the salary of 5000 yuan very bad? Why do girls look at people like that?
Yuan Fangfang said: I am telling the truth. You just want to marry me with a monthly salary of 5 thousand, which is really not qualified.
Fangfang said, give her an example:
You see, I'm wearing a skirt, and two sets are thousands. Can you afford it? I really don't look down on you. I'm just telling the truth. Blind date is always honest. I'm telling you, our conditions don't match and are not suitable.
The boy blushed and said, well, if I had known, I wouldn't have come. The introducer also said that you were a good girl, so I came.
As a result, Yuan Fangfang was very unhappy when she heard the boy's words. He was angry and said, what do you mean? Where am I not a good girl? I am so young and beautiful, and my monthly salary is several times that of you. Why am I not a good girl?
Boys also feel that the words are inappropriate, so they say, I didn't mean that.
Fangfang was still very angry, so she stood up and said to him, What qualifications do you have to say that I am not a good girl? 15 thousand a month. Are you qualified to marry me? That's interesting.
Say that finish, Fangfang angrily left.
Fangfang later said that she had never been wronged since she was a child. Why does this blind date say that she is not a good girl? It's so irritating.
After this blind date experience, Yuan Fangfang doesn't want to have a blind date. Does she think that she is such an excellent girl, and she is still afraid of not getting married?
Up to now, when my classmates talked, Yuan Fangfang was still single, and people always wanted to hook up with her, but she refused.
02
Yuan Fangfang's example of blind date, how do you say it? Whether we can talk about it or not, I think we should be kind, successful and not angry.
Furthermore, in the concept of marriage and love, we should also correct our respective attitudes. Everyone has their own conditions for choosing a spouse, but they don't have to hold a certain standard. If they adjust properly and know how to choose, their feelings may be smoother.
Many people find it difficult to find a partner. In the final analysis, it is still a question of standards. In addition to their own wishes, the vast majority of blind date objects are standard mismatches, outrageous or unrealistic.
Anyway, I hope that men and women who are in love or dating should know the following three things.
mutual respect
Free love between men and women needs respect, and so does blind date. If you can't even do this, how can it be appropriate?
For a girl like Yuan Fangfang, even if she has relatively high-quality conditions, she can't belittle the man blindly and let herself lose her dignity.
No matter how good a person's external conditions are, they are not necessarily good without certain connotation and cultivation.
The boy is 26 years old and has a long way to go. No one can say whether his future work or career will be good or bad. It's biased to look down on him blindly.
Besides, Fangfang is 30 years old, and boys don't mind this gap. If she is willing to put herself in her shoes and lower the standard appropriately, there is a great chance that two people will succeed in blind date.
Although there is a big gap between boys and Fangfang in economic conditions, who can speak well in the future? As long as boys are not bad and willing to work hard, I don't think they will be bad in the future.
It is disrespectful and uneducated to look at the immediate problems and ridicule each other's disadvantages with one's own advantages.
Therefore, mutual respect is very important. Regardless of whether the blind date is successful or not, we should respect each other.
Equal to each other
In life, there is no distinction between three and six, and everything is equal.
When it comes to feelings, both men and women should know this. Even if life is unequal, two couples or couples who want to be together should know equality.
When you are in love, it is wrong for one party to take and the other party to give. Those who are superior and inferior are like inferior people.
Two of a kind, not only has a harmonious relationship, but also has equal personality.
Blind date is also one thing. It is wrong to look down on people because you think you have good conditions.
The poor condition of the other party does not mean that his character is low, and the two are equal.
The reason why blind date is often looked down upon is that blind date is not treated fairly.
Without equal and matching conditions, it is impossible to be suitable. Selection is a two-way process. You are picking on people, and others are picking on you.
I hope that those men and women who are blind date should have a correct attitude towards blind date and treat each other as equals.
mutual understanding
Men and women need to understand each other. Take blind date as an example. Understand others with respect or disdain. Don't take yourself too seriously and don't take others too seriously.
A little more understanding may be that every blind date has many shortcomings, external and internal. It is wrong to blindly grasp these shortcomings, enlarge them infinitely and ridicule each other.
Good conditions are the advantage of future marriage, but they are not the only guarantee for a happy marriage.
Since dating, you need to show sincere attitude and understand others. You are looking for a partner, not a cohabiting partner.
Good feelings are not measured by material things, but by mutual understanding, joint efforts and sincere treatment.
If blind date only looks at material conditions and ignores others, it becomes a business. Do you think this combination will lead to a happy marriage in the future?
Therefore, both men and women should understand each other and understand that the basis of marriage is affection and sincerity, not money and material things.
03
Conclusion:
I have always believed that marriage should be that two people treat each other sincerely, and then work together and pay together to last forever.
Otherwise, no amount of money can buy sincerity. Without feelings, marriage loses its foundation.
It is not a good attitude for women to blindly demand economic conditions and for men to blindly demand youth and beauty. Once the concept of marriage and love has changed, even if you are given a good partner, you will not know how to cherish it.
Therefore, in any case, men and women should respect each other, be equal and understand each other. When the hearts are together, they feel that they can be combined, so we must understand these truths.
In this world, no one is superior to others. When you ask each other blindly, please also consider whether you have the same excellent conditions.
External, internal, character and conduct can not be ignored. Looking for an object, we should not only look at each other's material conditions, but also look at their character and sense of responsibility, which is more reliable.
In short, women can't just ask for it, let alone respect each other. It is your right not to get married, but you must respect each other.
Men should not blindly accuse women of material vanity. Not all girls are like this. In fact, it is also true that more and more women are becoming more independent.
Finally, I want to say that marriage is not a burden after two people are combined, but a hope after the birth of a new family, don't you think?