1, * * * feeling is also called empathy, empathy, * * * feeling ... This is the ability to put yourself in others' shoes to understand their emotions, needs and intentions. In short, it is the ability to empathize. * * * Love is both an attitude and an ability. As an attitude, it shows concern, acceptance, understanding, cherish and respect for others. As an ability, it can fully understand others and express this understanding in a caring, warm, decent and respectful way.
According to us ordinary people, it is "empathy" and "caring for others".
The quality of consultation relationship is very important to the consultation effect, and in the process of establishing consultation-visit relationship, the most important thing is to make visitors feel understood and accepted, and * * * love is the premise to realize all this. Therefore, * * * emotion is the basis of all psychological counseling in Mi Yue, and its role is very important. * * * Emotion can be embodied in various technologies, such as * * * emotional listening and * * * emotional expression.
Good feelings include three aspects: the first is the content, that is, whether you have an accurate understanding of the facts, opinions and situations stated by visitors; The second is the feeling of the visitor, which mainly refers to the counselor's accurate understanding of his (her) emotional experience on this matter through the visitor's speech and behavior performance; Thirdly, psychological counselors have a more comprehensive and accurate grasp of the emotional level of visitors.
2. The most important skill of listening to psychological counseling is listening. First of all, listening expresses Mi Yue's psychological counselors' active concern for visitors, which is conducive to visitors' sense of trust. At the same time, the visitor's speech itself has a catharsis or therapeutic effect; The most important thing is that the psychological counselor can grasp the main points from the information revealed by the visitors, find the root of the problem, and truly understand the facts told by the visitors, the emotions contained therein, and the cognitive concepts held by them.
The content of listening generally includes four aspects: first, the experience of visitors; The second is the mood of tourists; The third is the concept of visitors; The fourth is the behavior of visitors.
Listening in the process of psychological counseling usually has the following two forms:
(1) Analytical listening: In psychological counseling, we should listen attentively to the expressions of the visitors, not only to understand what the visitors expressed through words, expressions and actions, but also to what the visitors omitted and did not express in the conversation. This is a complete and effective listening.
(2) Reactive listening: When listening, psychological counselors should respond to visitors' stories with words such as "oh", "um", "yes" and "then", as well as nodding, staring and smiling.
It is also important to ask questions when visitors are fully talking. There are usually two kinds of questions, one is open and the other is closed.
Open-ended questions are usually asked in the form of "what", "how", "why", "can" and "would you like to tell me". This way of asking questions usually prevents visitors from answering only one or two words. It can lead to an explanation, explanation or supplementary material to collect information, and at the same time, it can also master the emotional reaction, views on events and reasoning process of visitors.
Closed-ended questions often appear when the content of the talks is in-depth, and it is necessary to further clarify the facts, narrow the scope or focus on some specific issues. Closed-ended questions usually ask questions such as "whether" and "whether". This way of asking questions limits the answer range of psychological visitors in Mi Yue, Saint Anne, and can prevent them from rambling. Be careful not to ask questions continuously, and don't ask several questions at a time, which will lead to confusion of visitors' thinking and ignore the answers to some important questions.
4. Expression consultation activities have two requirements for "expression", one is the expression of visitors, and the other is the expression of consultants. As the leader of counseling activities, it is an important link for counselors to guide visitors to express meaningful content and information in counseling activities. At the same time, good expression ability is also one of the important skills for counselors to guide and help visitors.
(1) Encourage: Use some words, such as "Hmm", "Fine", "Continue", "What's more", "Later" and "I can understand"; Or some physical actions, such as nodding, smiling, leaning forward slightly … show your concern, support and acceptance to the visitors.
(2) Interpretation: refers to the psychologist's comprehensive arrangement of the main contents and ideas told by the visitors, and then feedback to the visitors. Its function is to check whether the doctor understands what the visitor said accurately, and to send a message to the visitor: the doctor is listening to you attentively, thus improving the confidence of the visitor; The third is to help visitors have the opportunity to re-examine their psychological troubles and rearrange them.
(3) Clarification: It requires visitors to further explain, explain or supplement the vague or ambiguous parts of the statement. Common phrases: "Can you talk about ..." "Can you talk about ...". You can use specific techniques when clarifying.
Generally speaking, most visitors are willing to talk about specific things, experiences or emotional experiences. However, when some emotional experiences have a great influence on visitors, have a great destructive effect, and may be deeply hurt (such as the painful experience of being abused or raped), it is not appropriate to discuss specific things and experiences with visitors immediately.
(4) Interpretation: It refers to the analysis, explanation and explanation made by psychologists on the basis of a certain theory, scientific knowledge or personal experience, so as to eliminate all kinds of worries of visitors and get out of their psychological predicament. The explanation is based on the consultant's own reference system.
The explanation is valid only if the tourists understand it. Therefore, different levels of interpretation must be made according to the understanding level of visitors. Speak in an easy-to-understand manner, and use medical or psychological terms as little as possible.
(5) Self-disclosure: also called "self-opening" or "self-disclosure". Self-disclosure is an important and interesting phenomenon in interpersonal communication. If psychologists can reveal themselves, they can often effectively trigger the same degree of self-disclosure of visitors. There are two forms of self-exposure. One is that the counselor tells the visitor what he thinks and feels about the visitor. The second is that the consultant exposed personal experiences and lessons related to what the visitors talked about. The use of this self-exposure should be just right, not too much. If there are too many self-exposure classes, visitors will doubt the consultant's ability and may usurp the role of the host. If you expose too much experience, you will use your own strengths to expose the suspicion of visitors' shortcomings, which is easy to cause disgust.