Some time ago, I encountered the same problem as you, and it was also the second-generation ID card and ICBC. It is best to ask the other party to change the number, because you are a second-generation ID card, and people with the same number as you can't get the second-generation ID card, which means that the second-generation ID card has a one-to-one relationship. Moreover, there is a related principle in the Household Affairs Office now, that is, the second-generation ID card should not be changed first, but the other party's. However, even if the other party changes his account number, if he doesn't cancel his account in ICBC, you won't get the bank card, because the bank system is that the account and ID number are in one-to-one correspondence. So, as long as he doesn't cancel, you can't handle it.
In the past, users were allowed to use accounts, but now the policy is 16 years old or older, and they can no longer use the account book to apply for bank cards. I have consulted many places about this matter. It's actually quite simple. Just use a passport, there will be no problem of duplicate numbers. So if you are in a hurry to open the card, that's it. Of course, you'd better insist on letting the other party change the number in the future, otherwise, you will be in big trouble! It is also an arduous task to insist that the other party change the number. I'll tell you about the card first, and then you can ask me. After struggling for several months, I feel that I am almost a knowledgeable person of the second-generation ID card.
good luck