In high school, a group of gangsters surrounded a teenager after school and threatened to bleed him. Under the pressure of everyone, the teenager suddenly took out a fruit knife from his schoolbag and told them not to come over, which made him even more excited. One of the leading gangsters went up to provoke, stepped in front of the teenager, tore open the coat collar with his hand, leaked his neck to the knife in the teenager's hand, and insulted, you turtle grandson, if you don't believe me, dare you try, come on, chop me to death. Then, the boy stabbed him in the heart and died at the age of eighteen. A true story.
In the cinema, I watched a funny couple next to wonder woman (Goddess of Cardo), and the woman sat next to me. Wechat prompts a panic, and the frequency is close to 1Hz. Say it and forget it. Nnd also set the flash of incoming information, and the flash is still aimed at me! The ring. Hey, that's flashing, flashing, flashing, flashing! I turned my head to roll my eyes at her many times, but she was completely indifferent. Then I made a move. The next flash, I took a long drink of coke, began to twitch, sobbed and slept on the ground, and coke dripped from my mouth! Frightened by this funny couple, I sobbed and said, I, I, I have flash epilepsy. The funny couple stood up in fear and wanted to change seats. I suddenly stood up, grabbed the woman's hand, shook her hand, and said that it was all your (and Tik Tok's) fault. The man came up to pull me, and I grabbed his hand and shook it together (the benefits of fitness at ordinary times are reflected, and the man can't pull me at all). What a happy handshake! ! ! Then tease the couple to break free and run away like crazy people! I climbed back to my seat and continued to watch movies happily. Today's experience tells us that watching movies in the cinema is disturbing our own viewing, so we must protect our rights!
There is a teacher in my university who is a master of playing cards without following the routine. It is simply a model that makes sad students cry. People nickname strange old people. The strange old man is clean but untidy, and his image is bad. Once the strange old man went to buy bulk wine. When the seller saw that he smelled 20 yuan of wine, he joked: "It's all for people who go to work. You can drink 5 pieces. " The strange old man bought five pieces of wine happily without pleading. Of course, the strange old man is still very academic. He is also an undergraduate and graduate student of top5, and there are a large number of foreign visiting scholars. First, the elective course of the strange old man, a big classroom for hundreds of people. As soon as the old man entered the door, he said, "So many people? Those who have something to do go out to work, and those who have boyfriends and girlfriends go out to talk about friends. What I said today is meaningless. Why spend time here with me? " As a result, people went out by a third. The old man closed the door and said, "Finally, he swept away some rubbish. Come and call the roll. "
The second elective course, with experience, everyone will not leave. As soon as the old man entered the door, he said, "There are many people? Don't worry, I won't call the roll today. " As a result, a group of ignorant young people left. The old man did not call the roll. After class, the old man left 10 minutes to tear a piece of paper for each of us and write his name. Ha ha ha, fortunately, the old man didn't call the roll. Later elective courses came out from time to time. Most of the students who were caught failed this course. Forced the leadership to come forward and gently reminded me of the failure rate. Second, test scores. The strange old man not only deceived the students of the foreign language department, but also refused to let them go. There is no textbook and no focus in the exam of the strange old man. The test questions are usually given in class, and the ones that are not in class are basically finished. A disciple felt guilty after the exam and took the initiative to contact a strange old man, hoping to invite the old man to dinner, adding one point. The old man went to eat happily. Finally, the teacher scored 59.5 points.
The strange old man is not afraid of strange, so cute. I have not only been assassinated in this university for four years, but also have a good relationship with that strange old man. I got more than 90% in all his classes. The secret is simple: you really want to learn something. The weird old man is just weird, not a pervert. He hates ignorant and deviant people. The strange old man gave me many ancient books when I graduated. The old man taught me to be a person inside the outer circle. The outer circle is to adapt to the secular world, and the inner circle is to persist in becoming a god.
I clearly remember being robbed once when I was a freshman. I wore a watch of more than 50 yuan in the roadside gift shop. Stuck in a dark alley by a group of hooligans. Asked me for money, I said I really had no money. Actually, I have 20 bucks in my ass pocket. I was ready to be beaten, but I didn't get it because it was my online fund this week. The leading buddy shouted that he had no money and was waiting to be beaten. I also raised my stubborn mouth and said to him, "Big Brother, don't!" " I really have no money. "Suddenly, my eldest brother stared at my wrist, his eyes lit up and said," Hey, the watch in your hand is the same as what I just bought! Take it down and show it to me. "I thought, it's broken, and the watch is gone, so I have no choice but to take it down and give it to my big brother silently." Big Brother picked up a broken watch and savored it, just like 1982 when a gourmet tasted a bottle of coke in Atlanta. Then, big brother patted me on the shoulder in surprise, took the watch back to my hand and said, "It's exactly like my fucking watch!" " "Then he told his younger brothers that I was predestined friends with him, forget it today, and then roared away with a group of heroes, leaving me dumbfounded. Many years later, every time I go to buy a watch, I will think of that distant afternoon when my eldest brother patted me on the shoulder.
The wife who woke up in the middle of the night found that her husband sleeping beside her was gone and got up to look for it. I found my husband sitting alone in the living room, without turning on the light, with half-drunk whiskey in front of him, staring gloomily at the opposite wall. The wife asked softly, why did you go to the living room to drink so late? The husband didn't turn to look at his wife, his eyes continued to stare at the wall, and he said with a little emotion that we had been married for seven years. Do you remember when we first fell in love? The wife didn't expect her husband to be so sentimental, and she felt some emotion in her heart. She replied, I remember. The husband continued, "Remember when we were very close, and your father ran into us?" The wife sat down beside her husband and replied, honey, of course I remember. The husband's eyes were full of tears, and then he said, at that time, your father held a knife to my neck and threatened me to marry you, or he would send me to jail for seven or eight years. Do you remember all these scenes? The wife's eyes were a little wet and said excitedly, remember, dear, I remember everything! My husband finally couldn't help crying and said tearfully, if I had chosen to go in, I should come out now!