? Just like watching the stars,
? Can only see but can't touch,
? So
? Say happiness is
? Is it a false legend,
? But
? You didn't really see
? Did it give off light?
? The pursuit of happiness requires specific methods. If there is no proper method, happiness is just like the ethereal stars in the sky, just beyond our reach; If the method is right, you can't get the stars into the net.
? Unfortunately, it's a sea,
? Happiness is the other side.
? Why do I want it so badly,
? But still drifting.
? My cry in the storm,
? The lights on the shore are dotted,
? When can I land?
? Carnegie pointed out that the key points for women to achieve success and happiness are self-esteem, self-respect, courage and confidence. In dealing with family and career issues, we should pay attention to overcoming the weaknesses of human nature, give full play to the advantages of human nature, and give full play to women's potential intelligence, so as to obtain happiness in life.
feeling: do brave and confident women really bring their own aura, but as for the weakness of human nature? Everyone has weaknesses, so we should grasp the big and let go of the small, and calmly meet the test that life gives us.
chapter one? Nine basic skills of women's life
Let one step be high in life, and retrogression is the capital of progress; It is a blessing to be tolerant of others, and benefiting others is the foundation of self-interest.
? -Ming and Hong Zicheng
? 1. From a psychological point of view, everyone is afraid of being accused by others, including women and men, and men are more afraid of being accused by women. Therefore, as a woman, it is better to abstain from criticism, blame or complaint.
? From a psychological point of view, everyone is afraid of being accused by others, including women and men, and men are more afraid of being accused by women. Therefore, as a woman, it is better to abstain from criticism, blame or complaint.
? The objects we get along with are not absolutely rational animals, but human beings with weaknesses such as emotional changes, prejudice, conceit and vanity.
So I want to say, if you want to provoke a bitter resentment that will never be forgotten, just make a little harsh criticism. In other words, only people who are not smart enough criticize, accuse and complain about others. Indeed, many stupid people do this.
? However, it takes self-cultivation and self-control to "speak ill of others, but only their benefits", be considerate and forgive others. Please remember, ladies, the first principle in dealing with others is not to criticize, blame or complain about others.
2. Sincerely appreciate and like others
William James once said: "The most ardent need in human nature is the desire to be affirmed." The psychology of "hope is important", whether you can sincerely appreciate those men is directly related to whether you can find a satisfactory partner or have a happy family. So I want to warn ladies that when you get along with your boyfriend or husband, if you want both of you to have a good feeling of happiness, then the most important thing you should do is to sincerely appreciate them. However, the premise that you can praise them sincerely is that you must really like them.
? Feelings: My experience in more than ten years of married life is really like this. Everyone likes to listen to nice words, but this kind of nice words is not hypocritical, just for the sake of taking part in accidental amusement, but sincere and heartfelt. Marriage is mutual achievement and appreciation. What's the point if two people don't live together? Sincerely appreciate each other, appreciate each other, and see each other's advantages, so that the married life will be happy.
? Carnegie, a successful scientist, gave an example: George Washington, the first president of the United States, was most happy that someone called him "His Excellency the President of the United States" to his face; Columbus, the navigator who discovered America, once asked the queen to give him the title of "commander-in-chief of the fleet"; Hugo, a great writer, is most keen on the hope that one day Paris will be renamed Hugo; Even Shakespeare, the most famous English playwright, always tries his best to get a badge that can symbolize honor for his family.
? A successful man has gained a lot, but they will never get tired of the wonderful praise. Therefore, if you want to be the most understanding, charming and beautiful woman in a man's eyes, then your best choice is to sincerely appreciate him.
? The same is true for women. They always want to be appreciated and valued by others, even though they are not doing well enough. I believe that ladies often admire other women in their hearts, but rarely express this feeling. "Pickiness" seems to be a privilege given to women by God, so women are always dissatisfied with the people around them. They think that the people around them have not done enough, at least not to the point where she can appreciate them.
Feelings: I think this is a kind of person with high emotional intelligence, who can sincerely appreciate and like others, instead of being jealous and slandering.
Appreciation and encouragement are the best ways to motivate people to exert their abilities to the limit. Sincerely appreciating and liking others is the best lubricant for women to deal with interpersonal relationships. Never forget that in the process of interpersonal communication, we are in contact with people, not those who are eager to be appreciated. It should be said that giving others happiness is the most reasonable and reasonable virtue of human beings. Because hurting others can neither change them nor inspire them.
Carnegie's advice: In order to make myself sincerely appreciate and like others, I posted an old adage on the mirror at home:
People only have one life, and we should do anything good and good that can be contributed now, because life is only once.
Feelings: Don't act on small kindness, and don't act on small evil. Your kindness will bring great courage and warmth to others. Don't be stingy with your kindness.
3. Don't argue endlessly
In fact, being competitive is not a man's monopoly, and women also have this mentality. Moreover, women may be a little more than men just from the psychology of comparing with each other. From the psychological point of view, women's vanity is often stronger than men's, and their self-esteem is often stronger than men's.
? Feelings: I really met some people in my life who didn't want their authority and dignity to be challenged. When you try to change their mind, they will stick to their positions and never make any concessions. At this time, those competitive ladies are not willing to lag behind, so they choose to argue with others, and they must argue a result. I wonder what caused this. Not only self-confidence, but also a little conceited.
? How to avoid arguments:
? You can keep silent first;
You should learn to tolerate the mistakes made by others.
? When others accuse you of your mistakes, you should accept them gladly;
? You can consider changing the subject to avoid arguments.