Role: Zhuge Liang, Huang (Zhuge's wife), Liu, Cao Cao and Cao Cao's subordinates.
Props: a table, two chairs,
Scene: Zhuge Cao Lu inside. You can see the garden outside through the window.
The curtains are dark. )
Off-site voice (male voice): Dude, do you still want to be a counselor? What the counselor wants is to use his head. What about you? What kind of glasses can you make? Horseshoe, unicycle, moonlight box ... Do you think this is a factory? what are you reading? Anger. That's what I said. The most ridiculous thing is that this suit not only doesn't fit, but also matches a tie and shirt as a failure! Be professional during the interview, okay? Illiteracy and martial arts, do you want to be Edison? Let's go home and do promising farm work!
(chasing light, Zhuge Liang is here. )
Zhuge: Hello, everyone! My name is Zhuge Liang. After graduating from college, my classmate and wife, Huang, and I live in Longzhong and are currently unemployed at home. Nowadays, there are disputes among princes in the world, and the career of counselor is very popular, so my wife forced me to be a counselor. I study mechanics. How can I be a counselor? Alas, this is 10 1 interview failure!
(The curtain is getting brighter, Zhuge and Huang clean up. )
Huang: Honey, you're back!
Zhuge: (embarrassed) Ah, back.
Huang: How was the interview today? How's it going?
Zhuge: This ...
Huang: It worked, didn't it? Right?
Zhuge: Uh ...
Huang: Yes! Yahoo! I know that my husband is a reliable person and will become a successful person sooner or later.
Zhuge: Wife ...
Huang: I knew you would succeed. Zhu and A Zi in my dormitory dumped their boyfriends and got married with the counselor. They also laughed at me for refusing to leave you. In fact, I knew you would succeed!
Zhuge: Wife ...
Huang: I'm going to kill the pig now and make your favorite pork stew vermicelli. ...
Zhuge: Wife, wife, and so on.
Huang: What is it?
Zhuge: Sit down first.
Huang: What's wrong?
Zhuge: I have something to tell you.
Huang: Go ahead.
Zhuge: Promise me not to get angry first. ...
Huang: Oh, dear, how can I-you didn't fail the interview today, did you?
Zhuge: (laughs) Oh, dear, you are so clever that you guessed it at once. I didn't know what to tell you just now. ...
Huang: Get down on your knees! (Zhuge knelt down in panic) You Zhuge Liang, lie if you can! I knew you were a terrible commodity! How could I marry you blindly!
Zhuge: Wife ...
Huang: Shut up! You don't want to think about it either. Can't you find something that can't be solved?
?
Zhuge: ...
Huang: Fortunately, I saved a hand. I tell you, a man named Liu Bei will come later. I'm still a small company, but this is the kind of company that can take you.
Zhuge: What? What happened afterwards? Come here?
Huang: Yes.
Zhuge: (running in a panic) It's over, it's over, it's over.
Huang: Husband ... (See Zhuge doesn't listen to her) Kneel down! (Zhuge knelt down and gently) Husband, get up and sit down. Calm down first.
Zhuge: No way.
Huang: Don't be afraid. I'll help you when someone comes.
Zhuge: What can I do to help?
Huang: I'll watch in the yard when people come. If you don't know what to say, just look out the window and I'll teach you.
Zhuge: Will that work? Will be seen.
Huang: We used a trick of winking at school.
Zhuge: Lips?
Huang: Yes, everyone who tested the note was arrested, and only the two of us survived. We will use this trick in the future.
Zhuge: But it's been so long that I can't remember some of them.
Huang: I don't believe it.
Zhuge: (looking back)
Huang: (swoops down) Honey, you are so annoying!
(Liu Guanzhang, see it and retreat, Huang chased it out. )
Liu: I didn't see anything.
Huang: (smiling) Mr. Liu, my husband was blind in one eye just now. I screwed him up. Look, this is sand (take a ping-pong ball). Please come in. I will kill the pig and cook for you. (Walking into the yard)
Zhang: Brother, can this Kong Ming do it?
Liu: Third, you know our present situation. Think of it as a dead horse and a living horse doctor.
Zhuge: Welcome, welcome. I'm glad that President Liu is here. I have heard a lot about President Liu. My admiration for you is like a raging river, like the uncontrolled Yellow River flooding. ...
Zhang: Don't talk so much nonsense. Seriously.
Liu: Don't blame me, sir. My three younger brothers have a bad temper, but they are not rude. What do you think of world affairs?
Zhuge: (I don't know what I'm talking about, look at the yellow prompt): There are many princes hanging around in the world, but only two of them are very procrastinating, so they can be called heroes. One is Cao Cao and the other is Sun Quan.
Liu: Oh? Then what should I do?
Zhuge: (Look again) Cao Cao debuted early and had many men. At the right time, Sun Quan occupies a rich place in Causeway Bay, with a favorable geographical position. You can get along well with the police station, so you can get along with others.
Liu: I don't see that Mr. Zhuge is still very insightful.
Liu: What should I do?
(Zhuge looks again, and Huang is chasing pigs with a knife in the yard. )
Zhuge: You big ears! !
Liu: Big ears?
Zhuge: What are you looking at? I am talking about you!
Guan: Brother, is he crazy?
Zhuge: You are lazy and fat all day. You run around if you want to kill you. Do you think you really have something to do with the royal family and the country?
Zhang: Brother, it seems that you are really talking about us.
Zhuge: Today is your time to die!
Liu: Is this an ambush set by Cao Cao?
Zhang Guan: Run! (Three people running)
Zhuge: Still want to run? Do you think you can run? I catch you, I fork ~ ~ ~ ~
(Three people run, Huang advanced with a knife, and three people escape)
Huang: Honey, what happened?
Zhuge: What are you doing with a knife?
Huang: I'm killing a pig to make you an appetizer.
Zhuge: That's not necessary. They're gone.
Huang: Why?
Zhuge: Not sure. ...
Huang: Did you fail the interview again?
Zhuge: (kneeling) Don't be angry, wife.
Huang: Why don't you make progress?
Zhuge: I have worked very hard, wife! But I'm not cut out to be a counselor at all. I don't want to be a counselor!
Huang: Not a counselor? Do you want to be a vassal
Zhuge: I just want to be a skilled worker. I have skills, wife!
Huang: Why don't you have any ambition?
Zhuge: What is ambition? Is it only when you are a vassal, a counselor, a powerful person, a rich man, and a rich man that you can be considered ambitious? Honey, what I have been holding in my heart for a long time, I dare to say it today. I don't think I can be a counselor. It doesn't matter whether I have money or not. The important thing is that we can live together forever, have a baby and live a plain life.
Huang: Zhuge Liang! ! You ... you disappoint me. Do you know what kind of man women want most? A man who can rely on and give her a sense of security. I don't like money and power, but in such troubled times, can a man without these give a woman a sense of security? One day I was robbed, and there was no place for you to cry! (crying)
Zhuge: Wife ...
Huang: (ignoring)
Zhuge: Honey, it's all my fault. Don't be angry. I will continue to look for a job tomorrow. I must be a psychological counselor, a reliable man who gives you a sense of security.
Huang: (crying in her arms) Husband! !
(Liu is back)
Zhuge: You finally changed your mind?
Liu: No, there is a drag bottle outside!
Cao Cao: (Entering) Haha ~ ~ ~
Q: Cao Cao?
Cao: Big ears! I just hacked your brother Liu Biao. Where are you going now? Brothers, copy guys and chop people!
Huang: Boss, please calm down first. We can chop people if you want, but our place is small. Could you please take the three of them to the street and chop them up again?
Cao: (under the opponent) This girl is very hot!
Upstairs: Sister-in-law, if our boss wants to hit on you, just be our sister-in-law!
Huang: Boss, I already have a husband.
Cao: Husband? Who is her husband?
Zhuge: Uh ...
Cao: Is that you?
Zhuge: I ...
Cao: Hit him!
(The pain is flat and the yellow is pulled)
Cao: Boy, here's 100,000 yuan. This is a family allowance for you. You can divorce your wife in three days. Brothers, protect the eldest sister-in-law, first drag these three people into the street and cut them down!
(make a mess)
Zhuge: Stop it! !
Cao: What for? Are you a burden, too
Zhuge: I don't want this hundred thousand dollars, I just want my wife.
Cao: Boy, dare you say that again?
Zhuge: I just want my wife!
Huang: (crying) Husband!
Cao: Wow, boy, you have great courage and personality. I like it. All right, I'll give you a chance. Here are two chess pieces, a white chess piece and a black chess piece, which I hold in my hand for your choice. I'll give you the black one100000, and my wife will take the white one. You still owe me100000 yuan. How's it going? Dare to gamble?
Zhuge: OK, I'll bet you.
(bet Zhuge wins, guess what? )
Cao: Well, you are cruel. Let's go!
Huang: (pouncing) Honey, how do you see through their tricks?
Zhuge: Very simple. My glasses are not ordinary glasses, but super mahjong lenses I invented. Through it, I know that all he has is Bai Zi. That's why I thought of this way. Hit him. Honey, what do you think of my performance?
Huang: You are great!
Zhuge: Really?
Huang: Really!
(yeah! Two people high-five to celebrate)
Liu: Mr Zhuge, I met a talented person. I decided to buy your patent and do something big. This is a deposit of 200 thousand.
Zhuge: (surprised) Two hundred thousand.
Liu: Too little? Plus 200 thousand
(Xia Liu)
Huang: Honey, I shouldn't have forced you to do something you didn't like before.
Zhuge: No, dear, I'm too backward.
Huang: No, honey, you gave me a sense of security.
(The two embrace, the curtain fades, chasing the light)
Huang: The moon is out!
Zhuge: It's beautiful.
Huang: Honey, do you still remember our college days?
Zhuge: Of course, how happy we were then.
Huang: When Arjun and A Zi complained to me about their husbands, I thought they were born happy, but now I understand that the happiest thing in the world is not money and status, but growing old with the people you love!
Huang: Husband!
Zhuge: Wife!
Huang: Husband!
Zhuge: Wife
Three visits to the thatched cottage (film)
Roles: Liang, Huang Ah (Zhuge's wife), Liu Feng, Cao Cao, Luo Hao Cao.
Props: a table, two chairs,
Scene: Cao Lu inside Zhuge. You can see it through the window outside the garden.
(Black screen. )
Off-site voice (male): Brother, would you like to be such a consultant? Are you a brain consultant? What will be your wonder, your horseshoe, your unicycle, your box of moonlight ... When did you plant it here? See what? I said angry. The most ridiculous thing is that this suit not only doesn't fit, but also fails to match the shirt and tie. It's a failure! Be professional during the interview, okay? Do you want to be Edison, because you can't write or travel in martial arts? Or go home and do promising farm work!
(Light up, Zhuge Liang. )
Zhuge: Good! My name is Liang. After I graduated from college, I lived with my classmate Huang and his wife Aaron, and now I am unemployed at home. Nowadays, world leaders are at loggerheads, and career counselors are all the rage. My wife regards me as a forced consultant. I study mechanics. How about being a material consultant? Alas, this is already the failure of 10 1 job interview!
The screen gradually lights up, showing that Zhuge Cao is Lu Zhishen and Awang is clean. )
Huang: Your husband is back!
Zhuge: (embarrassed) Ah, come back.
Huang: How to interview today? What should we do?
Zhuge: ......
Yellow: It worked, didn't it? Is that so?
Zhuge: ... hmm ...
Huang: Yes! Yahoo! I know that I can rely on my husband to be a man and become a successful person sooner or later.
Zhuge: His wife. ......
Huang: I know you will play in my dormitory. A Zi also dumped her boyfriend, a married consultant, and joked that I never wanted to leave you. In fact, I know you will succeed!
Zhuge: His wife. ......
Huang: I'm going to raise pigs now. Do you like pork stewed vermicelli? ......
Zhuge: His wife, his wife, waiting for you.
Wang: What happened?
Zhuge: Sit down first.
Yellow: How?
Zhuge: Let me tell you something.
Huang: Hmm.
Zhuge: Do you promise to be angry? ......
Huang: Oh, her husband, how can I-you won't finish the interview today, will you?
Zhuge: (laughs) Oh, honey, you are so clever that you guessed it at once. I just don't know how to tell you ... okay. ...
Yellow: Down! (Zhuge knelt down in fear) You're smart. It depends on your skill. Will you cheat you? I know you can't put down a shipment! How could I marry you when I was blind!
Zhuge: His wife. ......
Huang: Shut up! Don't think you didn't notice that your hair fell into the chimney mound. You were so obsessed with quarreling that you went to the field drain with straw.
Zhuge: ......
Huang: Fortunately, I have to stay in the primary election. I tell you, I'll call Liu Bei later. Although they are still small, this will be your company.
Zhuge: What? Stop for a moment? Yeah, this?
Wang: Yes.
Zhuge: (running in fear) It's over, it's over, I quit.
Wang: ... Husband (see Zhuge didn't listen to her) Come down! (Zhuge's knees are weak) Husband, come and sit down. Set the first set.
Zhuge: I won't do it.
Huang: Don't worry. The others stay here and I'll help you.
Zhuge: How can I help you?
Huang: Leave them here. I'll have a look in the yard. If you don't know what to say, look out the window and I'll teach you.
Zhuge: Then can you do it? Will be read out.
Huang: We made eyes at each other at school.
Zhuge: Lips?
Huang: Yes, those papers from the first exam were all arrested. We both depend on this for our survival, and we rely on the brave Zhao.
Zhuge: But it's been so long that I don't remember some of them.
Huang: I don't believe it (lips)
Zhuge: (looking back)
Huang: (pouncing) Honey, I hate it. Oh, hello!
(Liu Feng, anxious to see this, Huang Fu)
Liu: I didn't see anything.
Huang: (mockingly) Mr. Liu, just now, I lost my husband's eyes. I helped him keep out the wind. Look, this is sand (holding the table). Come on. I'll cook for your pig. (Walking into the yard)
Zhang: Big Brother, can perfect vision be achieved?
Liu: Sanzi, you know our present situation, so we should treat it as a dead horse and a living horse doctor.
Zhuge: Welcome to Mr. Liu. I'm so happy. I've heard of Mr. Liu's name for a long time. I admire you for being like a raging river, like the Yellow River flooding out of control. ......
Zhang: Don't talk so much nonsense. Seriously.
Liu: Sir, I am anxious about my third brother's temper, but I don't know how big your vision is.
Zhuge: (I don't know, see the yellow tip): There are many leaders of Chu's soul in the world, but only two of them are La, which can be said to be heroes. One is Cao Cao and the other is Sun Quan.
Liu: Oh? What should I do?
Zhuge: (Also) As early as Cao Cao's debut, more than a day after the establishment of Emperor Wen, Sun Quan occupied the rich land of Causeway Bay and had a favorable geographical position. You can do a good job in the police station and relations, you must do so.
Liu Feng: Mr. Zhuge can't see it, but he is still very insightful.
Liu: What exactly should I do?
(See Zhuge and Huang putting a knife in the yard to clean up the pigs)
Zhuge: Your big ears! !
Liu Feng: Big ears?
Zhuge: What are you looking at? What are you talking about?
Guan: Brother, he's not crazy, is he?
Zhuge: You're lazy for a day, and you're fat. I killed you and ran around. Do you really think you're out of breath in Hoang Cam?
Zhang: Brother, it seems that we are really talking about this.
Zhuge: You must die today!
Liu: Is this an ambush by Cao Cao?
End: Run it! (three runs)
Zhuge: Want to run? Do you think you run it? I catch you, I fork ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
(Three runners plunged into Arabia-Huang, and three escaped.)
Huang: Honey, what's the matter?
Zhuge: What are you doing with a knife?
Huang: Can I give you a drink?
Zhuge: No, they're gone.
Huang: Why?
Zhuge: I'm not sure. ......
Huang: You also failed in the interview, didn't you?
Zhuge: (kneeling) Madam, please don't be angry.
Huang: Why isn't your progress like this?
Zhuge: I've been working hard, and my wife! But I don't expect to be a consultant. I don't want to be a consultant!
Huang: Unsuitable consultant? You want a leader?
Zhuge: I just want to be a skilled worker. I have a skill and a wife!
Huang: You're not very interested in that ambition?
Zhuge: What is this ambition? Is it called ambition only when leaders do this, when consultants and powerful people enjoy high positions and great wealth? His wife, there are some things I have been holding in my heart for a long time, and I said them today. I don't think it's appropriate to be a consultant. It's not important to have no money. What's important is that we can never live together. A child's average life expectancy is too light.
Huang: All the squares are bright! ! ... you ... you disappoint me so much. Do you know what kind of man women are looking for? A man who can rely on and give her a sense of security. I don't like money and power, but can't a man give a woman a sense of security in this troubled times? One day I was taken away, and there was no place to cry! (crying)
Zhuge: His wife. ......
Wang: (ignoring)
Zhuge: Honey, it's all my fault. Don't be angry. I will continue to look for a job tomorrow. I want to be a consultant. You must be a man who can rely on security.
Huang: (crying in his arms) Husband! !
(Liu Huifeng)
Zhuge: Did you finally change your mind?
Liu: no, drag it outside!
Cao Cao: (Entering) ~ ~ ~ Haha
Focus: Cao Cao?
Cao: Big ears! I just beheaded your brother and Liu Biao. Where have you been now? Brothers, the real estate speculators in Ren Kan!
Huang: Boss, calm down, you are not even us, but we have a small place here. Can you work with the three of them to cut it down in the street?
Cao: (Next opponent) That horse is punctual!
Louluo: Sister-in-law, we have to hook up with your boss. Your sister-in-law should be ours!
Huang: No, 1, I have a husband.
Cao: Husband? Who is her husband?
Zhuge: ... hmm ...
Cao: Yes, are you?
Zhuge: I ......
Cao: He is flat!
(Pain distinguishes, yellow stops)
Cao: Son, this is 100000. I'll give you a living allowance, and you are allowed to divorce your wife within three days. Brothers, sister-in-law protection, cut three people in the street!
(make a mess)
Zhuge: Stop! !
Cao: What? Do you also drag?
Zhuge: 10 million I don't want it, as long as I have a wife.
Cao: Children, do you have the courage to say it again?
Zhuge: As long as I have a wife!
Wang: (crying) Husband!
Cao: Wow, boy, you have a lot of courage and personality. I like it. All right, I'll give you a chance. There are two pieces, one white and one black. I choose in your hand. I choose black and keep my wife. I give you100,000. I choose white and my wife is gone. You still owe me100,000. Like what? Can you bet?
Zhuge: OK, I'll bet you.
Zhuge won the bet. What do you think? )
Cao: Yes, it's hard for you. Let's go!
Huang: (Pu Ru) Husband, how did you see through their tricks?
Zhuge: Simply put, this is not ordinary optical glasses, but a special perspective for super mahjong invented by me. Through it, I know that he is in the hands of the former Bai Zi. I think the only way to win him. His wife, what do you think I like?
Huang: You are great!
Zhuge: Really?
Huang: Really!
(yeah! Applause to celebrate the two)
Liu: Zhuge, I met someone who can be said to be capable, and I decided that I want to buy your patent and do something big. This is a drop of 200,000.
Zhuge: (surprised) Two hundred thousand.
Liu: Too little? Another 200 thousand.
(Liu Xiafeng)
Huang: Honey, I shouldn't force you to do something you don't like.
Zhuge: No, my wife, I have made progress, too.
Huang: No, honey, you can give me a sense of security.
(Two people embrace each other, the screen darkens and lights up)
Huang: The moon is out!
Zhuge: America really does.
Huang: Honey, do you remember when we were in college?
Zhuge: Of course I remember how happy we were then.
Wong: `In the past, A Zi's husbands complained to me that I thought they were happy when they were born. Now I understand that the happiest things in the world are not money and status, but love and growing old!
Huang: Husband!
Zhuge: Wife!
Huang: Husband!
Zhuge: Wife