Class 09 13 of Xia Ji Middle School, Linwei District, Weinan City
Chen Cuiping
"Accumulated soil is a mountain, and the wind and rain are prosperous; The water drops merged into the ocean and the dragon was born; Accumulate goodness into virtue, the gods are complacent, and the sacred heart is prepared. Therefore, you can't take Wan Li Road without accumulating steps; If you don't accumulate small streams, you can't become rivers and seas ... "Whenever you read these sentences, a scene will flash before your eyes-
Dropping into the sea, Wang Yang is willful; A single spark can start a prairie fire
Everyone knows the idiom "a drop of water wears away a stone" and the story "If you don't sweep a house, how can you sweep the world?" . This contains a philosophy: quantitative change to a certain extent will cause qualitative change.
A beggar was lying on the side of the road and no one noticed him. Even if someone saw him, he didn't inspire "sympathy" and moved on. When a person goes to see a beggar with curiosity or concern, a miracle happens, and people around him will slowly gather around, from one person to dozens, dozens, hundreds or even countless; People's behavior has gradually evolved from initial curiosity and concern into a large-scale good social atmosphere, so quantitative change has caused qualitative change.
"The big line ignores it, and the gift does not hesitate to let go." Yes, at the moment when Liu Bang tried to escape from Xiang Yu's military camp, this was undoubtedly correct and scientific, but judging from the law of things' development and evolution, the principle explained by this sentence was wrong. We can't imagine that it is wrong or even harmful for society to do big things and ignore small things. If a child develops some bad habits at an early age, and adults don't care to teach him, he may continue to develop like this, so that he will develop from a "small evil" to a "big evil" and eventually fall into the quagmire of illegal crimes. From this point of view, people's growth, the cultivation of social atmosphere, "caution" or "care", "small concession" or "resignation".
Every little makes a mickle, and a little change will become a big change. In the process of our study, this truth is more obvious. A classmate's academic performance was average, and he didn't care, but after the teacher taught him, he learned from a painful experience and decided to cheer up and change course. As a result, I learned 12 every day, and I understood everything I learned that day thoroughly. In this way, he persisted day by day, and finally he rose from 40 in his class to 29, and finally jumped to the fifth place. Teachers, classmates and parents all look at him with new eyes. Until the college entrance examination, he was admitted to a key institution, which was really incredible and amazing! Quantitative change accumulates to a certain extent. Isn't this a typical qualitative change? Without this classmate's day-to-day efforts and constant changes, how could the college entrance examination have "great changes"?
Tall buildings have sprung up. If there is no masonry, how can there be a magnificent scene of "high-rise buildings soaring into the sky" The boundless desert, if you leave the sand, how can it last forever? The sea is boundless. If there are no water drops, how can it never dry up? ..... let's pay attention to "small", without the accumulation of "small", how can there be "big"?
Let us always remember that a drop of water can turn into the sea and a single spark can start a prairie fire! (959 words)
The most commendable thing about the comment is that the idea of this article is very accurate, which lays a good foundation for the idea of writing. This article is an excellent model for those students who repeatedly digress and digress in the process of monthly examination!
Secondly, this paper can closely focus on the idea that "quantitative change can cause qualitative change, and small things can become great things", with pure style, always grasping the "center" in analyzing problems, and gentle and powerful arguments; In addition to giving examples and comparing positive and negative arguments, a set of parallelism sentences is used at the end to make a figurative argument, which increases the vividness and readability of the article.
There are still some deficiencies in language expression, so I scored 59 points.
Pass on love and change the world
Class 09 13 of Xia Ji Middle School, Linwei District, Weinan City
Zhang Yanli
I don't know if you have noticed. Just because you do a small kindness, people around you will follow you to repeat the same kindness. Slowly, you will find that this kind of kindness is no longer your own patent, but a kind of public behavior, so the whole social atmosphere has changed, and "small kindness" has become "great kindness" This is exactly what Liu Bei said: don't do it because of small goodness, don't do it because of small evil.
Passing "little love" can change our lives and even a country!
Once upon a time, "cricket fighting" became a game in the court, even popular among the people. As a result, a large number of crickets were sacrificed to the palace, and society followed suit. Over time, some people forget their pursuit of life, some people get caught up in it, and some even ruin their happy homes. The continuous spread of small games has become a bad habit that harms society and ruined a huge dynasty. The metaphor is self-evident!
Pay attention to the world, the streets and lanes, the Woods and vaginas, regardless of men, women and children, the sound of mahjong is endless, and the mahjong cards are twisted. I think the RMB is chic, fun and leisurely! It is understandable to play a game once in a while. People's lives have improved. Why not keep a bird in a cage? What's more, a small mahjong game! However, you didn't see me. The hemp I saw fell in this room and turned over in that room. I was so numb that I was hit under the table, breathing weakly, foaming at the mouth, and my life was almost deprived. At work, you are numb to me, everyone is numb, the work is in a mess, and the job can't be saved.
Everyone wants to have a good society. But everyone said: What does the atmosphere have to do with me? So you are like this, I am like this, everyone is like this, the atmosphere remains the same, and the bad habits do not change. Finally, I blame the government. So in the past, so change, maybe disaster is coming, and the storm is slowly approaching. None of this is what we want to see. What we want is the transmission of justice, love and warmth.
A person may not be able to extend a hand to help a victim, but as long as this beautiful action continues and continues to be passed on, you will find that there are so many good people around us. You pass on love, he passes on love, and love spreads all over the streets, so that our life will be better and the blueprint of a harmonious society will be more brilliant.
When the country is in danger, if you donate a dollar, it may only be enough for one person to eat a loaf of bread. However, when love continues to spread, you will see that people all over the country are extending a helping hand, and with an earth-shattering and weeping love, they will support the blue sky of hope for the people in the disaster areas.
If one person changes his behavior and speech, he will change another person's behavior and speech, and then change more people's behavior and speech. You may not feel much about a small change and progress, but as long as this small change happens every day and continues every day, one day, you will wake up in the morning and see a stranger smile at you and say, "Good morning!" " In that case, are we still afraid that the social atmosphere will not improve? We will also worry about human unrest?
Don't hesitate to reach out your hand and let your eyes shine with warmth and friendliness. Starting today, start from your side and pass "little love" to the ocean of "great love", because your every move will affect the world and it is more likely to change it! (word 1029)
The intention of commenting on this article is also very accurate. The most commendable thing is that the author can wrap the philosophy "quantitative change leads to qualitative change" contained in the material in the specific "framework" (theme) of "Love changes the world". This kind of effort to concretize the meaning of the material is precisely the ability that most students lack, and it is also a skill of examining the topic-focusing on the material (or topic). When this step is done, it will be much easier to write. I hope that under the guidance of this model essay, everyone can understand the "Samadhi" of the examination concept!
Stylistically, the author is well aware of the greatest feature of argumentative writing, or "theoretical thinking". Generally speaking, the author mainly adopts two ways of argument, refuting first and arguing later, which form a positive and negative comparative argument; In the whole discussion process, we always pay attention to the meaning of the center and the material, and the analysis and reasoning are in place, which is convincing.
Sometimes the language expression is not enough, and the argument is slightly less concentrated, so 50 points.
Quantitative cause a qualitative change
Class 09 13 of Xia Ji Middle School, Linwei District, Weinan City
Mengyuanyuan
One person's heart, ten thousand people's heart, mutual understanding, knowledge change, social change, world change.
For thousands of years, people's understanding of nature and the universe has been continuously improved. The change and progress of knowledge are all due to the doubts and bold assumptions of pioneers, so many people focus on this and make great efforts to conduct in-depth research, thus generating new ideas and forming new theories.
Aristotle believes that two objects fall from a height, the heavier one is faster and the lighter one is slower. For thousands of years, no one doubted or dared to doubt. But Galileo boldly doubted and put forward his own views. He thinks that two objects with different weights fall at the same speed. Some people think he is arrogant, others think he is crazy, and others are as skeptical about Aristotle as he is. The leaning tower of Pisa throws double balls, and the new idea is finally verified. From "geocentric theory" to "Heliocentrism", Bruno devoted himself to it, and Copernicus was jailed. With the deepening of human understanding, "Heliocentrism" finally defeated the "geocentric theory", so the Pope had to release Copernicus and declare him innocent.
It is precisely because of the bold questioning and the pursuit of thousands of times that human beings keep advancing and exploring on the road of knowing the truth.
The Silk Road is long, the mountains are grey, and Zhang Qian has crossed mountains and rivers to celebrate the holidays. Only a narrow escape, the countries in the western regions made friends with the big fellow. How many times camel bells jingled and caravans came and went, the world didn't know China. When Zheng He went to the Western Ocean, how many times he was attacked by storms, how many times he was blocked by pirates, how many times he went forward bravely, and how many times he had sincere exchanges. Only then did the powerful China win the understanding of all countries and establish friendship.
A cannon of the October Revolution brought Marxism to China. Advanced intellectuals accepted Marxism-Leninism and propaganda, and various * * * production groups mushroomed, which finally ushered in the establishment of China * * * production party. Fighting local tyrants, dividing fields, causing industrial unrest, how many martyrs threw their heads; Anti-encirclement campaign, Long March, anti-Japanese bandits, how many heroes shed their blood; Three major battles, historical drama, majestic * * * and the Oriental Stand.
Deng Xiaoping, set a course, and the country will prosper through reform and opening up. 30 years of exploration, 30 years of wind and rain; 30 years of reform and opening up, 30 years of well-off life. Get rid of superstition and take economic construction as the center; Contract production and see a prosperous countryside; Surname endowment and surname society, another ideological innovation; The establishment of the socialist market has deepened the reform and opening up; Theory of Three Represents makes the party's flag brighter and the future brighter. Connecting the past with the future, small recreational activities, the Asian Games connecting five continents, and the Olympic Games broadcasting the voice of China; One country, two systems, Hong Kong and Macao return, countries shake hands again, brotherhood is deep, and the ancient oriental country has a new look.
Mr. Lu Xun said: "There is no road in the world. If there are more people walking, it will become a road. " With the spread of Marxism and the establishment of the * * * production party, we led the people of the whole country to carry out the new-democratic revolution and socialist modernization, and then carried out magnificent reform and opening up to build a well-off society. At that time, we didn't need to emancipate our minds and update our knowledge. Because of this, the ancient and young China is radiant, coquettish and unique, and has embarked on a road with China characteristics.
Although one lamp can't illuminate the night, if thousands of lamps shine together, the world will be bright and brilliant. Although a small voice can't change people's understanding, thousands of small voices in Qian Qian will form a huge wave of reform; Although picking up a piece of paper scraps can't change the messy environment, picking up thousands of pieces of paper scraps will make a beautiful and tidy environment around us ... (1040 words)
This life review can accurately grasp the meaning of the question, and the article directly takes the material center as the topic "quantitative change causes qualitative change", which is proof. In terms of materials, the continuous progress of human understanding and the history of founding, construction and reform can all be used as the carrier of the theme, and the ability to aggregate materials can be seen. Argumentation and analysis are more powerful, replacing discussion with narration, and combining narration and discussion is the biggest feature of this paper's argumentation and analysis.
Although there are some good sentences in language expression, the overall development is not good, and a small part of the materials (the current media reports on events) do not conform to the overall material style, so the score is 50 points.
Fourth, comment and guidance.
Examination guidance is very important, and students must be given solid examination guidance and training in combination with specific topics before the examination. In this monthly exam, there are more than 1000 students, and almost 90% of them deviate from the meaning of the material and only grasp the words "change" and "concern" on the surface of the material, which is distressing!
Secondly, argumentative writing is the weakness of all students, and the college entrance examination composition emphasizes "speculation" and "theoretical thinking". Therefore, we must firmly grasp the training of argumentative writing, train students to write standard argumentative writing, make students master its structure skillfully, especially teach students the method of opening their minds, and make students conceive writing in a short time.