Emotional expression, venting, venting
Advocate and encourage the emotional expression of help seekers, allow and guide the emotional expression of help seekers, and oppose emotional expression.
First, advocate the emotional expression of help seekers.
What I understand as emotional expression is that the helper feels unconditionally accepted by the consultant and trusts the consultant, thus expressing himself in front of the consultant. By conscious control, I mean that the subconscious feels safe enough to allow the unconscious to express their feelings.
As parents, a good relationship is better than a good education. Are you allowed to express your feelings? How long have you not cried? Japanese TV once broadcast a cooking program in which several men cut onions, but several people didn't cry! They suppressed their emotions for a long time and could not shed tears.
Do you think men don't flick when they have tears? Do you think tears are a girl's patent? It is ok to shed tears, which is a healthy emotional catharsis, allowing yourself to shed tears when you are sad.
When you allow yourself to cry, you allow your child to cry. When you allow your child to cry, the child will show his emotions in front of you because he feels safe and allowed.
Second, allow and guide the emotional catharsis of the helpers.
Help-seekers become help-seekers because they suppress too many emotions. Provide a safe environment for help seekers to vent their emotions. This catharsis is also an emotional expression under the control of consciousness.
Emotional catharsis is not complaining or blaming each other, but venting one's repressed feelings.
When a child has emotions, we should guide him to vent his emotions. Emotional venting methods: speaking, writing, drawing, singing, jumping, crying, etc.
Third, oppose emotional venting.
Venting is a sign of emotional out of control. Road rage is an emotional vent. Road rage generally refers to the fact that drivers can't control their emotions during driving, and are prone to anger and anxiety, which is usually triggered by another driver or the outside world, and then shows aggressive or violent behavior. Usually manifested as verbal insults, personal attacks or dangerous driving.
Be wary of turning the punishment for children into their own emotional venting.
For parents, punishment is aimed at children's behavior, not the children themselves. What we should pay attention to is that in the process of punishment, parents themselves punish their children's wrong behaviors with incorrect behaviors, such as hitting and scolding their children, and even sneering at their children with vicious language, turning the punishment on their children into their own emotional venting.