2. If a boy's mobile phone wallpaper is you and all his social passwords are told to you, then you can take his money and go.
When I was a child, I was always disobedient, playful and disruptive. My father hit me, and I forgot how many slaps I slapped, but I never admitted my mistake. Later, my dad got tired of playing, so he patted the wall and let me play by myself.
4. If today's girls walk in the ancient streets and are dragged back to wash their faces by the emperor at night, will they be convicted of bullying the monarch and so on?
5. I always feel that I am a potential stock if I don't work hard. I tried hard and found it really impossible.
6. In the final analysis, women are emotional and have no immunity to all kinds of small animals, such as Bugatti Veyron, Hummer, Jaguar, Land Rover, BMW and, of course, Tmall.
7. Eating food is kind, because I just want to eat every day and have no time to calculate others.
8. I feel that life is always aimed at you everywhere because you are ugly. If you are beautiful, it's as if you are hanging up every day.
9. At a friend's party, a buddy was drunk and I took him to the hotel room. Then inform his wife to take care of him. As a result, at the moment when his wife came in, he shouted: Give me a smaller one.
10. Give yourself some confidence. Don't sit in the right position when others mention being fat, because you may not be able to sit down!
1 1. When I was a child, female ghosts always liked to scare me in my dreams. Now I'm grown up, sensible, single for a long time, and female ghosts are afraid to appear!
12. Today, my friend said he would change trains with me. After listening, I agreed. He handed me a bus card when I gave him the car keys.
13. Stupidity is contagious. Stay away from me. I'm witty.
14. You don't know how stingy my boyfriend is. He gave me a 0.25 red envelope on Valentine's Day and told me to read it backwards.
15. I said I like a very good boy, but I feel no chance. My mother said what are you afraid of? Although you are poor, you can have access to such a good person, which shows that he is doomed.
16. Don't mess around if you don't look good: some people spend a lot of money to iron delicate princess rolls, which don't look like princesses, but like Newton.
17. I don't have any outstanding advantages, but I have a special eye for girls. The girls I chased all married good people in the end without exception.
18. I went to physical education class in junior high school and got sick that day. I wanted to give my leave note to my PE teacher, but I fumbled in my pocket and found a ten-cent note. Unconsciously, I said, I'm leaving. The teacher frowned and said something harsher: this is too little. ...
19. The teacher said, students, don't fall in love early. What you say now will be someone else's wife in the future. As soon as I listen to it, lying in the trough and thinking about other people's wives, I get excited.
20. Learning is my wife and my mobile phone is my concubine. I miss my concubine when I am with my wife, and I feel guilty when I am with my wife. I am not a qualified husband.
2 1. A pregnant woman was told that she was calcium-deficient, and she said that I would go home and drink pig bone soup. The doctor said unhurriedly, "Now pigs are slaughtered in three or four months, and the feed grows faster. It lacks calcium than you, and you don't know what to use to supplement calcium. What do you expect from it? " "
22. If you like someone, you have to confess. If you hadn't been rejected, you really thought you were a heartthrob.
23. One day, the leader visited our company and saw the fish tank in my office. After reading it for a long time, I didn't see what it was. Ask me. I replied, "Shrimp." The leader was stupefied and turned away. I quickly shouted: "Bring shrimp!" Shrimp! Leadership. The leader is really a shrimp. "I was fired the next day.
24. I hope to get a heart, don't always blind date.