I asked him: What did you do when he was dissatisfied with you?
He said: Sometimes you argue irrationally, and sometimes you try to change. But no matter how I set it, he is often dissatisfied, and I am particularly tired. I want to change my job, but I can't afford such a good salary. If you don't change, he always advises me.
I asked: What is your hope?
He said: he can gently emphasize when I don't do well. If I do well, he can express his approval for one thing.
This hope is very interesting.
"Doing one thing well is to agree with one thing", which is a logic of "I am so good, you need one thing to be satisfied".
Obviously, this is not the case at work. At work, everyone has the responsibility to express their approval to you.
What is the standard for filing the crime of marital fraud? The essence of work is that I give you money, so work for me quickly. Other emotional needs, such as satisfaction, recognition and attention, are all emotional benefits outside of going out to work.
You need leading cadres to satisfy you emotionally. At that moment, you will treat him as a mother and treat yourself as a child.
And this leading cadre doesn't want you to be a mother. You're hurt.
Nobody owes you anything.
Everyone has psychological needs.
Some people will ask for emotional consideration in marriage, which is the most direct, rich and deserved field.
In a psychological state, if you need him to attach great importance to, identify with, attach importance to, be satisfied with, accept, appreciate, care about and be intimate, you will treat each other as parents in a psychological state. It seems that he has breasts, which complements your mental state. But you are still a baby. Open your mouth and suck.
The essence of marriage is to find someone to help me breastfeed, consider my emotional needs and make up for my poverty.
That's why these basic theories of "find someone who can spoil your children" are so popular. The old hen soup tells the true demands and wishes in people's hearts.
I don't know that treating myself as a child right away will make people feel guilty, so people can't realize it right away. At this moment, people need subconscious development.
Everyone will cover up the baby's needs by reprimanding, complaining, pleasing, reasoning, enduring, cold violence and other ways to suck breast milk. They will even take advantage of their convenient and true status as leading cadres, parents, lovers, etc., and take the opportunity to put forward emotional considerations and force each other to let us breastfeed.
This classmate's leading cadres are like this. He used his job to express his dissatisfaction, which exceeded his own dissatisfaction with his job and gave vent to his personal lust.
The subconscious of this leading cadre is likely to say:
I am trying to find fault with you. I am not satisfied with you. I want you to know how powerful, smart and picky I am.
In this way, you will know that at that moment, leading cadres are asking for recognition and key. And this classmate, in terms of satisfaction and key, they are very young in terms of psychological state. If you keep coming down, you will know who won the bad influence.
I'm not saying that you shouldn't be a child in your work relationship and other relationships. It's just that you need to understand:
Give you emotional needs, which is caused by your earlier poverty. You can hope to get them at work, but be clear that it is not the responsibility of leading cadres to meet your emotional needs.
He wants you to be a mother, and he is satisfied with your expression, which means you are lucky. He didn't want to express his approval. He just wants you to have money. It's his job.
High EQ means wanting to be someone else's mother.
The essence of association is two words: want and give. That is, taking and investing.
Marriage law lawyer consultation free hotline, life is to give up and get, time is to attack and defend, business is to buy and sell, very simple sociological connection between Yin and Yang.
If you have been asking for feelings, you are asking the other person to invest in feelings. At this moment, if he puts in one point, your dependence on him will increase by one point, and he will be consumed by one point. At this moment, he wants to avoid your driving force.
If you have been in love, you will consider each other's psychological requirements. At this moment, if you put in one point, the other party will depend on you more, and you will be exposed more. At this moment, he is more motivated to touch you.
Therefore, if you want to get acquainted, you should treat each other as children. If you want to break the connection, treat yourself like a child.
If you have high emotional intelligence and want to contact leading cadres actively, you can also seize their psychological needs and give them some consideration as parents.
Imagine, if you are dissatisfied with leading cadres, what do you think of this sentence:
Thank you for your attention. It really benefited me a lot.
Leading cadres, you are more careful than me and learn from you.
Leading cadres will have a great sense of accomplishment in front of your eyes at this moment. I will tend to touch you emotionally, and then I want to create many sources for you in practice. Everyone wants to do a lot of things in front of people who make themselves comfortable.
In other words, if you always treat others as children emotionally, others will actually give you more consideration.
Does the Women's Federation need to pay for marriage mediation? When you are someone else's mother, you will be wronged, but it is not simply inferiority. It's just that you want to invest the relative cost for better consideration. Either be wronged or give up. If you are given more things to think about, you will naturally invest.