Finishing, does this still need consultation and study?
This is the most frequently asked question by many new friends recently.
I want to use a recent ranking case to explain this question.
Is it really everyone's job to solve this problem? Can everyone do it well? Not exactly. This friend who came to consult, let's call her Xiao A. She told me that she especially wanted her home to be clean and tidy. Although I read "Separation", there are many things at home, so it is too difficult for her to lose things.
Because the whole house is too large, let's start with the lady's own clothes. If clothes can be tidied up, so can other items.
Xiao told me that the clothes have been sorted out and many clothes that can't be worn have been cleaned up. There are 10 pieces of clothes that I can't wear at present, but I like them very much. I plan to lose weight before I wear it.
Here's a question. If you like a dress very much, but it doesn't suit your figure, will you buy it? Should I wear it after losing weight?
Most people have had this experience, and my answer is-absolutely not. There is an 80% chance that you will waste money. In fact, very few people can really lose weight. Why is that you?
So I asked Xiao, "If you were given another chance, would you still buy it?"
The little one replied, "Of course not!"
"Are you sure? These dozens of clothes are not bought at once. "
At this time, she gave another reason. It turned out that most of the clothes were sent by her sister, and the quality was very good, but even if they were not suitable for her, she was not willing to throw them away.
It turned out that her sister always thought that she was a little backward financially and would send her some clothes.
There are actually only two ways to control the number of projects-input and output. "Break" means cutting off unwanted things from entering the house. A dress, maybe it's my sister's heart, maybe it's of good quality and style. If it doesn't suit you, it's a waste to leave it at home and dust it in the closet.
So my suggestion is that if there is a suitable person who really needs it, you can send her clothes; If you don't have it for the time being and can't bear to throw it away, you can also put it in the closet to remind yourself that you can't let unwanted things in.
These are just small fragments of the whole consultation.
It's not so much finishing counseling as psychological counseling.
In Xiao's story, we can analyze her current living conditions, interpersonal communication, and her expectations and hopes for the future through consultation. Don't throw, don't want to throw, it's not a matter of ability, but some knots are not opened. The finishing consultant is the person who holds the key and can dial it from the side.