The latest issue of "Seven Pa Shuo" is entitled:
Should parents ask their brothers and sisters to let them go?
I saw a wave of wronged brothers and sisters in Weibo's comment area.
They said:
I'm the boss, and I've been asked to let my brother. I'm so fucking bored.
I am a sister. I grew up on the advice of "Leave my brother alone". If you don't, you will be said to be disobedient and ignorant.
Whenever I hear my sister crying, my parents will scold me, without asking why.
My brother hit me with a heavy object and cried. My mother said, he is still young, don't argue with him.
It can be seen that brothers and sisters who are asked or even forced to let go of their younger brothers and sisters are very hurt. Even if they are all adults, the injury is still there.
Yes, this is our first time. Why should we let you go?
Who is not a baby?
A 2-year-old brother needs protection, but a 4-year-old sister doesn't.
A 27-year-old reader said that my brother is 2 1 year old and my mother is still begging her to let him go.
She asked him why he was an adult. Just because he is young, the whole family made way for him. Who will make way for him when he goes out?
She is extremely tired of such unreasonable demands.
Others asked:
Can you be selfish without hurting people?
I never think that it is selfish for my brothers and sisters not to let my brothers and sisters go, because they are all independent individuals and have the right to choose not to let them go.
Whether on TV or in the media, we have seen too many tragedies about being born in a family, one of which is the eccentricity of parents.
There is a program in The Theory of Teenagers:
A girl named Cui Jing tearfully accused her parents of favoring her 6-year-old sister.
She cried and said that she could see that she was very sad at a young age.
Standing on the rooftop, she said that her sister often bullied her deliberately because of adults' likes. Whenever there is a contradiction, her sister goes to complain to an adult.
Adults often indiscriminately reprimand their sisters for not being sensible.
She cried and begged the audience's father to say:
"Dad, can't you believe what your sister says every time? At least try to trust me once! "
But in front of many teachers and students, my father scolded her again:
"My sister is too young to understand, don't you want it?"
This is the thinking of eccentric adults to solve children's contradictions:
As we all know, the boss is hurt in this situation. After all, the boss is also a minor child, which is the age when parents need care.
Once, a boy of 1 1 years old ran away from home in Jiulongpo, Chongqing.
Later, he knocked on other people's doors and asked for shelter.
After being taken to the police station, I realized that after he had a younger brother, his parents didn't care much about themselves, and they were not as patient with my tutor as before.
He wants to run away from home, but he doesn't feel safe outside, so he wants to be someone else's child and knock on the door everywhere for asylum.
The child's heart is so sensitive that parents can see it in their eyes and remember it in their hearts if they ignore him a little.
Even if the boss is forced to let go of the second child by his parents, he may hate the second child in his heart.
Mr. Lu Xun said:
"Tragedy is to destroy the valuable things in life for people to see."
Every hated boss has endless pains in his heart.
The arrival of the second child, originally belonging to the boss's favor, suddenly transferred to the second child, such indifference, directly caused the boss's inner insecurity
Coupled with parents' preference for the second child, the moral kidnapping of the boss is a naked injury to the boss.
If you think that the boss "indulges" the second child by his parents' education, it will only hurt the boss, then it is all wet.
Because it is harmful to the same old man, and it is not good.
If brothers and sisters always give way to their brothers and sisters, the preferred brothers and sisters will have a wrong idea:
It is only natural that others let me go.
After a long time, my brothers and sisters are used to what others have done to them, and they are also used to getting something for nothing. There are also more selfish and lazy elements in their characters.
A person who likes to get something for nothing naturally has no motivation to do anything when he grows up, and it is difficult to succeed in doing anything.
Not long ago, the real version of the "Fan Mei Sheng" incident caused an uproar.
Luo Luo, a 23-year-old girl from Hangzhou, died unexpectedly. Instead of showing heartache and sadness, her parents went to Rolls-Royce to make a scene.
Her mother even bargained with Lolo's boss with exquisite makeup, and the lion asked for compensation of 4 10000.
And even more incredible is yet to come.
After digging deep into her social platform, netizens found an outrageous fact.
It turns out that Lolo is often asked for money by her parents. She was asked to buy a house for her brother with 200,000 yuan, and the 4 10000 yuan she asked for after her death was also for her brother.
In the eyes of his family, Lolo's existence value is to support his adult brother.
What you can't get is always in turmoil, and what you are optimistic about is fearless.
My brother may not have encouraged his parents to make a scene, but he has long been used to doing nothing without taking responsibility and hiding in the corner to enjoy the pleasure of getting something for nothing.
Therefore, there is nothing he can do about such a life event as getting married and buying a house.
It can be said that due to parents' demands for "letting" education, the injured eldest brother and incompetent second child have been created. All victims, no one is spared.
Some people say:
From ancient times to the present, the traditional virtue of the Chinese nation is to respect the old and love the young. In ancient times, there was a beautiful saying that "Kong Rong let pears".
Yes, but please note that respecting the old and caring for the young should be "love" from the heart, and Kong Rong is willing to "let" the pear.
Under what circumstances will a person love others from the heart and let them go?
The answer is:
Only when your inner love and security are abundant will you do this.
Otherwise, it is a lack of inner security. I feel that my parents are eccentric and have always asked my brothers and sisters who have been "let go" to be depressed and wronged.
And younger brothers and sisters who have been accommodated since childhood may become arrogant. When no one makes way for him, he will feel that the whole world owes him.
As Chen Ming said:
"Many people still feel that they are the whole world when they are 18 years old, because of the lack of education and the lack of scientific educational concepts.
Therefore, instead of struggling to let go, it is better to teach two children to love each other and teach them to share and care for each other. This is the highest realm of family education.
The correct way for parents is to cultivate a seed of love in their children's hearts, from loving themselves to loving others and then extending to everything around them.
Because love is the source power to solve all problems.
Children with love have higher empathy, and their hearts are full. If they love themselves, they will love others.
Only when children learn love from their parents can they appreciate each other and achieve each other. This is also the best appearance of brotherhood.
end
Illustration | Jade Face