Why do blind dates basically fail?

1, the first sight is very important. The image of first meeting is very important. When we first met, both sides looked at the face value and figure. Only when both face value and figure are acceptable, will there be a desire for further understanding. There is a saying on the Internet: Your appearance determines whether I want to know your heart, and your heart determines whether I want to deny your appearance. Visible appearance is the first impression. If the appearance does not meet the requirements of the other party, then the other party will have no patience to chat with you. If you think the appearance is not bad, you will have a further understanding. People who can come on blind dates are not young, most of them have some emotional experiences and are stubborn psychologically (one of the reasons for being single). Everyone will have a vague standard in mind. In many cases, whether to continue or not is decided at the first sight. I was just rejected by a girl last week. There was only one blind date arranged at home, and I haven't seen it since. Later, when chatting, the girls directly said that they were not their favorite type, mainly because they looked fat and bloated, looked insecure and dressed casually. Anyway, I was blacklisted at first sight. In fact, whether a blind date can be successful is sometimes really decided by love at first sight. After all, we are here to find someone, not to chat. Everyone has a set of standards in mind. You can't be specific when others ask, but you should always look for it according to the standard. Therefore, many blind date objects just meet each other and hate each other late, which can only increase the probability of fate. Failure is normal. After all, everything has to be seen at first sight. You may be excellent, but I didn't see you next at first sight. It's over before it starts. 2, chatting is awkward, everyone is not young, they are all going to get married. Two people who don't know each other have little intersection, and the same topic is definitely less. When dating, women will directly ask men questions: how big the house is, how much the car is, how much money is saved, how much the monthly salary is, etc., all of which are related to the man's economic foundation. The questions men ask women are also very direct: how old they are, how many people they have talked about, and whether they want to have children. When the blind date scene of two people is full of straightforward questions, it will give people a feeling of transaction. Once the topic is too sensitive, it will make the blind date fruitless. When it comes to blind date, it is basically a real problem. There is no romantic love, but more of a straightforward transaction. Since two strangers are blind dates, they certainly didn't know each other very well before. If two people really know each other, just make an appointment. There is no need for blind date. For two strangers who come on a blind date with a purpose, there must be a more direct negotiation condition, which is often more sensitive. For example, boys are disgusted to ask themselves if they have a house or a car when they don't have much income, while girls reject their height when they are not tall. Naturally, blind dates often end in unpleasant ways. The meeting was still inconclusive, not to mention the subsequent development. It's basically the next one after meeting, or it's over before it starts. 3. Blind date is a mutually chosen blind date. Most of them were introduced by acquaintances. Many parents, relatives and friends just think you are "suitable", but they are not necessarily suitable. To some extent, the reason for arranging blind date is that others think you two are suitable. It is often said that girls nowadays want to have a car and a house with high income, but the next question is what you have to be such a good boy. In fact, blind date is also a mutual choice. Girls can ask boys to have a house and a car, and boys also have requirements, such as not being too short in height, not too bad in appearance, not too low in education and so on. Blind date is sometimes a process of picking people from each other. After all, marriage is a lifetime thing, so be careful. Why do blind dates basically fail? The first reason: people who are used to making social friends say that a girl is a day lily when she is over 30, and Xiaoli, 32, is a picky ghost in the eyes of relatives. Mom and dad let seven aunts and eight aunts find all kinds of blind date objects, and they have never really succeeded until now. They often met once or twice, and they all died in the end. Why do blind dates fail many times? That's because you're really not distracted! Good white skin, dignified appearance, cheerful personality, no bad hobbies, stable work income. The family sat together and analyzed the reasons why they couldn't find a partner. Finally, it was found that her living habits affected her life, so there were some problems in social dating. Every time I come back from a blind date, my parents always call the first time to find out the situation, and the answer is: not bad, just so-so. So my parents said, because you only met once, you don't know each other well, so it's good to know more. Three or five years have passed in a flash. During the Spring Festival, the matchmaker in my hometown introduced a 37-year-old unmarried man. Under the attack of both parents, the two met several times and kept in touch with each other by mobile phone. However, the matchmaker called Xiaoli's parents many times and said that Xiaoli's mobile phone often couldn't get through. Xiaoli's parents explained that because she is the manager of a coffee shop, the service industry can't check her mobile phone in time every day. The matchmaker asked again: if you don't answer the phone or reply to the text message too late, at least return it to others after work, otherwise it will be considered as a deliberate refusal. Once, in order to give her a surprise, a man went to pick her up after work at night. I didn't expect Xiaoli to leave the store. The night before yesterday, the man said Xiaoli was lying to herself and sent a questioning text message at night. The next day, he asked the matchmaker to call Xiaoli's parents. In fact, Xiaoli was at a relative's house that night. At this time, Xiaoli's parents realized that her daughter's habits for so many years would have such influence and misunderstanding. No wonder there were so many blind dates before, and they all went away. Xiaoli is also a big boy. Her parents went out to work when she was a child. When the left-behind children grow up, she has little dependence on others. She always thought she was doing well alone. She is addicted to her job. She always seems to feel good, but she doesn't feel too old to get married. Strangely, everyone is highly dependent on mobile phones now, but she is a person who tolerates the remaining 15% power in her mobile phone, so that others can never contact her. Born in the fast information age, whether out of courtesy or in essence, it is really a headache not to call back to find someone, let alone date. The second reason: occupational disease Haoyu was born in a second-tier city. After graduating from junior college, he worked as a mechanic in a shop in 4S for four years. Later, the real estate business was booming. It is said that selling several suites a year in real estate sales is worth a year's salary for office workers. So, he switched to real estate sales, struggled for three years, and bought a suite with his own skills to prepare for his future marriage. But what I didn't expect was that years of sales work had a subtle influence on his life. The most puzzling thing is that even when he was dating, the woman thought he was selling real estate and houses. When we first met and chatted, I asked the woman's topic voluntarily: How much is your salary? If you don't work, follow me, and you will earn several times as much money. Do you have any plans to buy a house? XXX district has great potential. I believe I won't lie to you. Don't listen to those advertisements. Do come to me when you buy a house. Is there enough money? How big a house are you going to buy? If you are my future girlfriend, I can also lend you money to buy it. It is right to invest more ... The topics of meeting and chatting on WeChat are all around the house, proudly proving my achievements, but I don't know that the woman has put a question mark in her heart, even disdaining it. I thought it was a blind date that mistook one for another, so I told my parents the truth directly. The woman said to Haoyu: You are a hard-working man. In front of you, love is second to career. I don't want people like you. In fact, the subtext of the woman's heart is: is this a business, a blind date? She wants to brainwash me and let me buy a suite! Remember that blind date, any small shortcoming of the other party can be the focus of veto. It is said that falling in love is because each other's bright spots are together, so blind date can gradually dig out the trust and trust that can last a lifetime with t a on the premise of accepting each other's imperfections. Do things for others, don't get into a dead end. Only by saying what you are good at and looking for similarities can you continue. The third reason: "Matching" The "matching" here is not only to tell everyone about the family background of both parties, but also because many people look at the "tag" to choose a spouse, because the "tag" over-affirms a person, but it has the opposite result. Huai Ming was born in an intellectual family. His parents taught in a university, and Huaiming's sister was admitted to a graduate school and successfully entered a public institution. Only Hao Ming rebelled when he was a child. Under the persuasion of his parents, he went to a junior college after finishing high school. Two years after graduation, he married a nurse in a city hospital on the recommendation of his parents. In the eyes of parents, people engaged in medical treatment are good-natured, gentle and virtuous, and have stable jobs. The nurse got married at the urging of her parents. However, after half a year of marriage, the nurse repeatedly asked for a divorce, and all her friends laughed at her for being stupid. How good their family conditions are, and several houses in the city center have no worries about food and clothing. However, she said: If the person who sleeps next to me every day is a person who only plays games, turns upside down day and night, and always treats himself as a child, I don't know what the purpose of marrying him is? Do you expect to rest on your laurels in the future? I chose his home because of his parents' occupation, but I didn't expect my son to be a cynic. They also think that I am smart and sensible, but in the end, I still can't get along. It's my three views on this man! Nowadays, blind date is like a hundred poisons to many older young people. But most of the time, it's not that they don't want to find the other half, but that if they are afraid of some people's ideas and barely cope, I don't think it's necessary and waste time, so that after N times, it's hard to extricate themselves. How can they meet ta at first sight! Why did the blind date basically fail? 3 1, too enthusiastic and purposeful. Undeniably, many people choose blind date because they are eager to get rid of being single. But I warn you, no matter how anxious you are, don't write it on your face. It is foolish to come straight to the point and show your purpose, or to be too attentive to each other. Your enthusiasm will scare off each other and make them think that you are a horrible marriage maniac. 2, too stiff to let go. Contrary to the above situation, there is another kind of person who is too stiff to let go and has no idea how to show his advantages. The whole date was a mechanical question and answer, which was boring. This depressing atmosphere makes the other party just want to end the date as soon as possible. Every blind date is unsuccessful because of 1. Enthusiasm is too strong and purpose is too strong. There is no denying that the other party thinks you are a marriage fanatic. Many leftover women choose blind dates because they hate getting married. However, it is foolish to warn the leftover women not to write hate marriage on their faces, not to come straight to the point and show their purpose, and not to be too concerned about each other. Your enthusiasm will scare off each other and make them think that you are a horrible marriage maniac. 2. I was too stiff to let go and didn't know how to express myself, so that the whole date died. Contrary to the above situation, there is another kind of leftover women, who are too stiff to let go and don't know how to show their advantages at all. The whole date was a mechanical question and answer, which was boring. This depressing atmosphere makes the other party just want to end the date as soon as possible. Caution is the number one killer of blind date, so we should cherish every blind date opportunity. 3. Strong self-esteem. The stronger the self-esteem, the more fragile it is. The more face-saving people are, the more vulnerable they are. Therefore, shameless people have a good life, and powerful people are miserable. The stronger a person's self-esteem, the less he can stand failure when dating. As I said before, blind date is a matter that seriously dampens people's self-confidence, and almost no blind date will be successful. In other words, most people will have failed blind date experiences. According to our statistics, on average, everyone has to experience at least three failures to have a successful relationship. In the best case, there is no upper limit, and there have been hundreds of blind date failures in a few years. 4. Habits are preconceived. Once you are dissatisfied with each other's first impression, you will start an absent-minded date. It is not a good habit to jump to conclusions about blind date. Don't attach too much importance to the first impression, and don't deny the whole date because of the bad feeling at first sight. It's still too early to draw conclusions, so you should give the other person and yourself a chance to get to know each other better. 5. Finding a blind date with a rich woman always fails. As long as you have money, you can buy beautiful bags and clothes, which is too tempting for women. Society is not perfect, and marriage is not perfect. If you go straight for money, marriage will inevitably have problems. There are always few rich people, and even fewer people meet your requirements. There are countless beautiful women in this society. When you think about it, you will find how unrealistic you are. The entertainment version will see so-and-so female stars marry rich people, and it is rare to see ordinary women marry rich people. This is reality. On a blind date, if you meet a man who has a car and a house, has good financial strength and is sincere enough to you, don't think about marrying a rich husband, don't you think?