First of all, it is very important to understand and respect his position. Everyone has their own values and concepts, which may be caused by growth background, family influence or other factors. Try to understand his point of view, so that you can better understand his behavior and decision. At the same time, express your feelings and needs and let him know that you are worried and confused about his inability to balance the family and everyone.
Secondly, establishing clear communication channels is the key to solve this problem. Communicate frankly with your husband and let him know your expectations of him and your bottom line. For example, you can tell him that although you understand his commitment to a big family, you also hope that he can devote part of his energy to a small family. Meanwhile, listen to his views and feelings. Maybe his views on family and everyone are different from yours. Through mutual understanding and acceptance, you can find a relatively satisfactory balance.
If communication still can't solve this problem, you may need to seek professional help. Family counselors or psychological counselors can provide neutral opinions and useful suggestions to help you find ways to solve conflicts. They can help you better understand each other's needs and expectations, and how to meet these needs without affecting other relationships.
Finally, remember to be patient and understanding. It takes time to change a person's behavior and ideas, and the results may not be immediate. Through continuous communication and hard work, you can find the best way to solve this problem together.
Generally speaking, when your husband can't take care of the small family and everyone, understanding his position, establishing clear communication channels, seeking professional help, and maintaining patience and understanding are the keys to deal with this problem. Through these methods, you can work together to find a solution that suits you.