You care about other people's eyes, opinions, feelings, manners, sympathy, emotions, details, perfectionism and loneliness.
Another word for sensitivity is subtlety. People with delicate heart, delicate mind and clear thinking will bring many positive factors, whether in life or work.
Like many philosophers, artists, writers, psychological counselors and so on. Sensitive people are suitable for jobs that require deeper thinking and awareness. Because they are very meticulous in thinking and super perceptive.
But being too sensitive will really bring you a certain psychological burden, because you think too much and care too much about other people's eyes, so it is easy to live in secular values and other people's evaluations.
Especially when encountering criticism and accusation, the inner reaction will be stronger. I will blame myself for not doing things well. When encountering this kind of problem, we should fully believe in our inner driving force and not be easily influenced by external evaluation.
Sensitive personality, you can make yourself a little insensitive through certain psychological training; It is not so easy for a person who is born dull to be delicate and meticulous.
Since you are aware of your sensitivity, after reasonable adjustment, keep this sensitivity when you are sensitive; When you need to be insensitive, so that you are not so tired and entangled, try to take the initiative to feel and minimize your sensitivity.
Get rid of realistic pressure by cultivating a hobby; Relax the nervous brain at the right time; Increase exercise, listen to light music, communicate with friends you can talk to … Let your nervous nerves relax in ways that interest you.
Remember: no one's evaluation, no one's eyes can represent you. You are you. Don't change yourself for other people's eyes. "Don't care" is your most powerful emotional weapon. Sensitive personality is a natural advantage for you. Don't feel useless and sensitive.
What's wrong with being sensitive or insensitive when you can reasonably control your personality range?
Sorting out one's sensitivity reasonably will promote one's inner growth and become the inner driving force of spiritual self. Here, I recommend a book "High Sensitivity is a Talent" to my sensitive friends. This book explains in detail many methods of dealing with highly sensitive people, which can be used for reference and will not be introduced here.
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The answer is yes. Why do you say that? Let's analyze it.
1. First of all, people who are sensitive inside are not confident. They are often skeptical about many things and conversations. They always feel that things are not that simple or that other people's actions and words are always aimed at or hinted at themselves. Then you will spend a lot of time and energy to analyze and prove your ideas.
2. Secondly, people with sensitive hearts are too cautious, and everything in life will ask questions or Charlie. They are more or less obsessive-compulsive, always worried that they can't do well, or care about other people's opinions, which will bring pressure to themselves and others.
Finally, and most importantly, people with sensitive hearts are too emotional or angry, and many small things are easy to cause disputes, and then they often feel irritable or guilty. Get along for a long time, the relationship will become stiff and broken.
To sum up, people with inner sensitivity are really tired, and living with people with inner sensitivity will also be very tired. If you are a sensitive person, you should put down your psychological burden and get along with your friends and family with a frank and relaxed attitude.
I think people who are too sensitive will be tired. Sensitive people always think too much, because they all think too much about a small thing and think too complicated about a thing. This kind of person always cares about other people's eyes, opinions and ideas. Being too sensitive will not only make you tired and anxious, but also make people around you feel nervous. Therefore, sensitive personality, it is best to try to change.
Sensitive people will have strong feelings for people, things and things around them, and this feeling is often based on the connection between people, things and things around them and themselves. Once you get in touch with yourself, you will inevitably pay attention to the existing and potential disadvantages, thus affecting your emotions. The more sensitive people are, the more they pay attention to unfavorable situations, and their emotions may fluctuate or even be negative, so it is difficult to get tired.
Too sensitive personality, pay attention to other people's ideas in everything. If you want to change this state, don't care too much about other people's ideas, change yourself psychologically, let yourself pay attention to yourself from the heart, and let others see what you like. Think what you want. Then try to change yourself in action. At that time, you will completely change your sensitive personality and not live too tired.
Sensitive people are tired and want to relax. They can start from themselves and learn to be broad-minded. If they are in love, they should avoid thinking too much. They will feel at ease when they do what they should do. From the troubles caused by sensitivity in the past, they can realize that there is no need to be sensitive, realize the negative consequences of sensitivity, and be open-minded. Learn to adjust yourself often, keep your mood relaxed and happy, learn to focus on what you do, and be confident in yourself, so you won't be so sensitive. Sensitive people tend to value the behavior of others, so you should avoid paying too much attention to others and pay more attention to what you do, and gradually this kind of trouble will be gone.
Sensitive inside,
Let most people feel very tired.
But it's not useless,
Do you want to know the other side of it?
This article takes you to explore a different self.
hypersensitive
be selfless
Once, I went to a book club. After chatting, one of the sharers asked me, "Do you think what I shared sucks? Nothing new and boring? "
This surprised me.
This is a girl of about 20 years old, wearing a white skirt, natural and graceful. The book I shared was The Bookstore on the Island, a book I like very much.
I asked her, "Why do you think your sharing is not good?"
She said, "Because when I first shared it, you were talking to the people next to you, and you looked at me from time to time, as if you were laughing at me."
Indeed, I whispered to the person in the next seat for a while. However, we didn't laugh at her, but praised her for her unique insights and made people admire her.
Just when I couldn't understand why she thought we were speaking ill of her, I suddenly realized that she might be as sensitive as me.
Sound, light, taste, temperature, smell, facial expression, emotional state, behavior, body language. ...
What's even more frightening is that the sensitive magnifying glass magnifies our surroundings, and at the same time, it magnifies ourselves, making everything seem to be related to ourselves, which is often very negative:
Other people's whispers are all about their own shortcomings;
The unfriendly eyes of others are expressing their dislike for themselves;
Others are depressed because they have done something wrong;
……
Therefore, we have been very cautious in life:
Be prepared for all possible situations when you speak, and don't let yourself make mistakes;
When talking with people, you should think carefully and consider every word, for fear of making the other person uncomfortable;
WeChat chat is the "expression king", because I always feel that lonely Chinese characters are stiff and indifferent;
……
Really tired.
To make matters worse, when we tell these heartfelt words to our good friends, they will only say:
"You are too sensitive and think too much."
Helpless, but will doubt, doubt whether you really think too much, and then fall into self-denial, want to abandon sensitivity, I hope I can be a fool sometimes, think nothing, and don't care about the external environment.
In this way, it is difficult to fall in love with the highly sensitive self, thinking that he is a "freak" and that sensitivity is a defect, an affectation and a blx. ...
About high sensitivity
What did psychologists find?
Elaine Aron, a famous American psychologist, is a highly sensitive research pioneer.
Elaine Aron believes that highly sensitive people have a special nervous system from birth, which can perceive and process internal and external information more deeply.
Elaine Allen is giving a talk on high sensitivity.
Simply put, high sensitivity lowers our threshold for external information, and perhaps only a slight stimulus will activate our brains.
Therefore, highly sensitive people have stronger insight and consciousness. But correspondingly, it also consumes its own energy, which will bring negative effects.
For example, after I stayed in the office all morning, I was surrounded by all kinds of physical information, and my attention to a lot of information made me saturated.
But the external information will not disappear, and more energy in my body will continue to be lost, so my work efficiency will become low in the afternoon.
In addition to paying attention to more information and being highly sensitive, it will also allow us to deal with this information more deeply, which may be just a casual glance by others and will be carefully pondered for a long time.
Elaine Aron found through investigation that in this world, 15%-20% people are highly sensitive, that is, 1 person in every five people is very sensitive.
Sensitive people are considered shy when they are young and introverted when they grow up.
As everyone knows, they are just very sensitive. In fact, 30% of sensitive person is extroverted, and half of them are male.
Admittedly, high sensitivity has brought us a lot of trouble:
It's easy to get emotional, even if it's just a simple warm-hearted public service advertisement, it will move to tears, not to mention those sad and happy love dramas.
If it's a horror movie, it's far more frightening than other movies, and it's often difficult to extricate itself. It will "live" for a long time in film and television dramas;
I care about other people's opinions and comments. No matter what you do, you should think for a long time in advance, for fear of leaving a bad impression on others.
But in practice, because these ideas have been hovering in my mind, there are many loopholes.
I'm afraid of making mistakes, but I often make mistakes. Obviously, I feel that others are not friendly to me, but I am too sensitive and think too much, so I have nowhere to defend myself. I can only tell myself not to be so sensitive, which is unpopular. ...
The trouble brought by high sensitivity is not only to let us experience stronger emotions.
Even more frightening is that it will make us deny ourselves and feel that our sensitivity is not good, which will make us more anxious and depressed. ...
But is this innate feature really useless?
sensitive
Is a gift that has been seriously neglected.
People with sensitive hearts often say: Don't be too sensitive, be tough and "slow down".
However, Elena Herdieckerhoff, who is committed to a highly sensitive cause, said in a ted talk:
People with sensitive hearts are not weak,
We have moderate and powerful strength.
Elena Herdieckerhoff speaks on TEDx.
Elena is also a highly sensitive person. She used to think that her sensitivity was a defect.
But when she was 25, she read Elaine Allen's book Highly Sensitive People, which completely changed her life.
She found that sensitivity is not a disease, and she is not a "freak" herself, just a little more special than some people.
What is important is that this particularity is so common, because about 20% people in this world are like themselves.
Later, she gradually discovered that sensitivity does not mean weakness, but is full of gentle power; Sensitive people don't need to be "slow" because we have a gift that can't be ignored.
This kind of strength, this kind of talent, can let us spend our lives well.
1. Sensitive people are more likely to establish deep relationships with others.
Inner sensitivity makes us always pay attention to the needs and emotional changes of others, that is, we can love others well.
To put it simply, * * * emotion means that we perceive other people's emotions and can empathize with them, just as it happens to us.
So we will know that the other party may be very sad now, and we can comfort Ta. When the other party knows that we can understand Ta's feelings, they will feel that they know Ta very well and have a sense of * * *.
In this way, a deep relationship and close ties have been established.
For example, when I was in college, I simulated psychological counseling with other students, that is, simulated the process of psychological counseling and practiced the corresponding skills.
That time, it was my turn to be a consultant. After that, everyone began to make a simple comment on this process.
After listening to their comments, I felt a little bad, because I thought I didn't do well enough, but I didn't say it (sensitive, I have higher requirements for myself, but I am good at hiding my emotions for fear of others laughing ...).
Just as I was preparing to bear this bad mood silently, a female classmate saw my inner loss and quickly comforted me.
At that time, I really felt that she was singing with me, and I felt that I was deeply understood, and the sense of loss disappeared instantly.
Later, when we were talking about it, she said that she was also a highly sensitive person and could detect other people's emotional changes at the first time.
When two highly sensitive people chat together, they really don't feel pressured at all, but they are particularly relaxed and happy because they can understand each other.
This understanding is the beginning of building a deep relationship.
2. Sensitive people can better avoid risks.
Sensitivity has evolutionary significance.
Imagine such a scene: when you come to a particularly strange environment, you are faced with two choices:
First, immediately put into the new environment to explore;
The second is to slow down, look around and think carefully before acting.
What choice would you make?
Highly sensitive people tend to choose the second one because they don't like taking risks.
Although it seems a little timid, if this strange environment is full of potential dangers, such as poisonous snakes and beasts, then their caution will be the greatest guarantee for their success.
This is the advantage of inner sensitivity: you will observe everything carefully and think carefully.
Even before I say a word, I will consider various possibilities, "He is angry, so I say …" and "He is happy, so I say …"
Although this practice looks very tiring, it can avoid many risks. No matter what happens, you can detect the wrong place, detect the risk and make full preparations.
3. Sensitive people can show extraordinary creativity.
Sensitivity makes our thinking particularly active, our inner world richer and we have all kinds of ideas. Moreover, sensitivity improves our associative ability and brings abstract thinking and image thinking.
Elaine Aron also found in the process of research and interview that sensitivity gives us ability and thinking, which can make us show extraordinary creativity.
In fact, many philosophers, poets, artists, painters and creative people in history are extremely sensitive at heart.
Because of their sensitivity, they can see a lot of beauty that others can't see;
Because they are sensitive, they can think deeply about a problem;
Because of their sensitivity, they can connect two completely unrelated things;
This is creativity.
About him, we are most familiar with the "Apple Landing Incident".
That day, Newton was suddenly hit by a ripe apple in the garden. As a stargazer on weekdays, he has such a question: Why did the apple fall down, not from left to right, or even hit the sky?
In this way, by sensitively connecting two phenomena in life: the falling apple and the distant stars in space, Newton showed amazing creativity: he put forward the law of gravity.
Inner sensitivity fills our minds with all kinds of things. When two seemingly unrelated things are suddenly connected, it may inspire dazzling brilliance.
I wish every friend with such talent can love the world more and be deeply loved by the world.
I feel really tired of living a sensitive life. The reason for this is the following：
First, there are many sad things in life than happy things. If a person wants to live happily, he must be good at adjusting his mood. People with sensitive personality are too easy to get emotional and hurt the Spring and Autumn Period.
Second, in life, we spend most of our time in contact with others, surrounded by all kinds of people. The words and deeds of others will make those sensitive people feel uncomfortable. So they will take care of others' feelings and ignore themselves, so how can they not live very tired!
Finally, I hope those people with sensitive personalities can adjust their mentality and live a happy life?
The same is life, some people live with relish, some people live as plain as water, and life is a mess. There will always be people who are not satisfied with their present life complaining about unfair fate, bad luck and bad family.
But in fact, all external reasons can't determine your life, let alone stop your happiness. People who have a bad life and feel very tired are mostly because of their personality. Generally speaking, most people with the following personalities live a very tired life. See if there is you.
1, too sensitive and always sentimental.
People who are too sensitive, sensitive and thoughtful, are easy to find details that others have not noticed, will be very concerned about the people and things they care about, and will always be swayed by considerations of gain and loss, thus affecting their mood.
They are always sentimental. An object and an unintentional word will remind them of their inner sensitive and fragile places. And you will think of yourself when you meet anything. If others say something unpleasant, it is easy to affect your mood. Such people are usually very tired.
2, very stubborn, like to delve into dead ends
Stubborn people, it is difficult to change a thing, and they don't like to tell others what they think. They are always fighting there alone, getting deeper and deeper, getting more and more painful, and finally turning small things into insoluble things or even knots that can't be opened. They seem very rational, but they are actually very emotional. They like to find reasons on themselves for everything, which makes them very tired.
3, too self-abased, accustomed to resignation.
People with low self-esteem have no confidence in themselves, worry about what others think of them, always think of others and ignore their own needs. They will sacrifice their own interests and help others regardless of their own ideas. Generally speaking, such people live very tired, because they always suppress themselves and don't even let others know what they really want, which makes it more difficult to get happiness.
4. Self-esteem is too strong, and the heart of winning or losing is too strong.
Self-esteem is a good thing, but too much self-esteem is not necessarily a good thing for a person. Because of their high self-esteem, they want to get a satisfactory result for everything, and they always like to be competitive, even for their relatives and friends. It is easy to destroy the original harmonious atmosphere, making people feel that such people are not easy to get along with, not only making themselves unhappy, but also making others unhappy. Such people will live very tired.
Life is not easy, why bother yourself. The world will not give in to you. Only by changing your personality and integrating into this world can you realize the happiness of life. I hope you can have a good time every day in your later life.
That's for sure. Sensitivity will care about many people and things, and care more about what others think of you. Everything will be considered by others, so that you will have no self, and you will become the most innocent and pitiful person who gives blindly without any return. Even if you are wronged again, you can't say it. You can only swallow your tears to comfort yourself. So you should always remind yourself not to pay blindly, hold your head high and be yourself, come on.