A: I have been experiencing setbacks. How should I face them?
I am a secondary school student, and the teacher always asks us to face setbacks bravely, but I have been living in setbacks, numb to setbacks, but confused. How can I get rid of them? Anyway, I am a student in a vocational school, and everyone looks down on me, including my parents and teachers. Sleeping in class and surfing the internet after class are my whole life, and I am not happy or happy. Netizen comes from: 1 17.57.64. * Expert answer: This classmate's trouble is a problem that many students often face now. I believe that as long as you understand and treat it correctly, you will surely reap a better tomorrow. A self-destructive idea is revealed from your words, but your choice to ask for help itself shows that you are not as motivated as you think. For your current situation, you can work hard from the following aspects. First of all, keep an optimistic and positive heart. The teacher is right. We should face setbacks bravely. Bravely overcoming setbacks means that you have gained another fortune on the road of life. You are numb to setbacks, probably because you didn't face them with optimism and didn't gain anything from them. In the face of setbacks, we should not only be brave, but also be positive. In fact, it is the significance of setbacks to gain some truth or belief from every setback. The next time you face setbacks, you might as well face them in the following optimistic way: 1, find someone to talk to. Some people call interpersonal relationship "spiritual oxygen bar". When you feel desperate, don't forget to ask someone you can trust for help. Their understanding can alleviate your pain and correct your ideological deviation at the same time. You can even learn about their difficulties through chatting, so as to get the determination and methods to overcome them. 2. Recall the peak experience. The so-called peak experience refers to a wonderful, fascinating and selfless experience in daily life and work. Psychologist Maslow's research on peak experience shows that it can help people to better heal mental trauma and cheer people up. When you feel depressed because of setbacks, don't forget to recall the past glory to boost your morale. In order to make the memories more specific, you can also look at the photos and used items left during the peak experience. 3. Advantage comparison method. At this moment, I might as well think about those who are more frustrated and unlucky than myself. Gain confidence through comparison. At the same time, you can also write down your own strengths, such as your own strengths; The reward you won; Creative things you have done; Others have praised themselves, and so on. 4. Change the environment. Can temporarily get rid of the frustrated environment. This is not to escape, but to give yourself a time to heal the wound. You can go out to travel, or you can learn the skills you are interested in in in a different environment. Replace and suppress the malignant information stimulation caused by setbacks with new stimuli. Secondly, establish a correct concept. You think that everyone looks down on you, which is extreme and incorrect. Everyone in this world is equal, but the division of labor is different. You can't blindly think that you are in a vocational high school, so everyone looks down on you. This is because you have never accepted the fact that you are studying in a vocational high school. From a psychological point of view, it is very important for people to accept themselves if they want to be happy. The most important thing for you now is to recognize yourself and accept everything about yourself. Only by recognizing yourself can others recognize themselves. Third, set goals and take practical actions as the starting point. You said that your life is monotonous and you have nothing to be happy or unhappy about. These things can be changed if you like. Now many students have the idea that every day is a daze in the past and life is boring. In fact, it's all because people don't set goals for their lives. Everyone needs a goal in life, because this goal can guide a person like a lighthouse and give him the motivation to move forward. You can set yourself a goal, and then your daily life can be some actions for this goal, so that your daily life is no longer simply sleeping in class and surfing the Internet after class. Life will become full and meaningful. Finally, enrich your life. Make your life busy, idle, bitter and happy. This is happiness, and being busy is meaningful. (Analyst: Professor Lin Chongde's interpersonal relationship research team, Ping Yuan, psychological counselor of the School of Psychology, Beijing Normal University) In fact, generally speaking, there are not many things you need to do: accept yourself, set yourself a goal and work hard for it, actively face setbacks, and don't forget to give yourself a little leisure life. I believe that as long as you do this, your life will definitely change dramatically. I believe you will have a bright future. More questions 120: What if I keep asking the same question? Question 1 19: How to communicate with your best friends? Question 1 18: Do children pretend to be bosses by swearing? Question 1 17: What should my daughter do if she is always nervous before the exam? Question 1 16: What should children do with other people's things? Question 1 15: What should my daughter do if she likes reading online novels? Question 1 14: What should I do if I like many beautiful girls? 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