In reality, there is such a group of people:
In the communication with parents,
The counseling plan they talked about is we
In reality, there is such a group of people:
In the communication with parents,
The counseling plan they talked about is well-founded and easy to win trust;
At the parent-teacher conference,
They are familiar with educational methods, hit the pain point and arouse the recognition of parents;
In team management,
The advice they gave was pertinent and inspiring, and subordinates adopted it one after another.
Why can they? Is it really better than you? In fact, he just knows how to convince others in conversation better than you.
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This is essentially the art of persuasion.
Many people think that persuasion is the reason why you beat each other with reason. Persuasion is a rational process, but in fact, even if you are well-founded and well-founded, there is no guarantee that you can convince the other party.
Compared with reason, persuasion is a perceptual process. The key to persuasion is to make the other person accept what you want him to accept from the other person's point of view. If you want to convince the other person to tell you the truth, you must bring him into instant thinking.
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The real persuasion is to change "I persuaded you" into "you persuaded yourself". It is not enough to reason, but also to use emotions.
The so-called instant thinking is to play a game for each other. In this game, his reason may always be off-line, and he will follow the path you designed for him and finally achieve your desired goal.
? Friends circle introduction
If you want to play a game of instant thinking, you only need four elements: single information, repeated information, vague goals and lagging results. ?
For example, friends circle marketing has firmly grasped the four elements of instant thinking. ?
① Single information: Parents look at the circle of friends of consultants, and the information flows in one direction. At this time, the content of your circle of friends is the only source of information for parents, and parents can only make the first decision based on the information provided by the circle of friends. ? Please note that a single message does not mean that only one message is sent.
2 information repetition: Some psychological experiments show that the more times you see something, but don't disturb users like WeChat business, the more likely you are to accept it, at least it will become one of your alternatives. ? Let your parents know your existence through your circle of friends, including before and after consultation.
3 vague goals: few parents want to buy things when they look at their circle of friends. When they look at their circle of friends, their goals are vague. If the content of the advertisement is good, they are likely to come to consult.
4 Lagging of results: In the circle of friends advertisements, we always repeatedly amplify the reasons why you come to take your children for consultation, and will not give you an excuse not to come. The end result is that you have placed an order before you know it.
? One-on-one consultation skills
1, let the other party feel your sincerity.
The key to convey sincerity lies in the speed and intonation. When persuading others, we are easy to get emotional and speak faster.
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(1) Consciously controlling the speed of speech can leave the impression that the other party is in no hurry. Remember, great people speak calmly and orderly.
(2) Bass is more convincing than treble. It will play a great role to lower your voice at the critical moment of the conversation.
Throw away the notebook during the conversation and devote yourself to face-to-face conversation.
(4) Be careful not to stare at each other's eyes. Look at each other's eyes for a while, and look at other places for a while to minimize the discomfort of the conversation. ?
2. The skills of monologue
Sometimes your sincerity is not enough to make the other person think in an instant and open his heart with you. The key point is here. You should use monologue technology to guide the other person into instant thinking.
A monologue is when you speak alone and don't need the other person's response. The purpose of monologues is to divert the other person's attention.
For example, when parents come to consult, they should shift their focus from "consequences". It is to take parents out of the anxiety that their children will not get into a good university with poor grades and then their lives will be over, and take them into the game of instant thinking.
Monologue, to sum up, actually conveys four sentences: first, your behavior has reasons and excuses; Second, the responsibility is not entirely yours, don't blame yourself too much; Third, I have seen this situation many times; Fourth, things are not as bad as you think. I have a solution. ?
? Correct use of parent-teacher conferences
If you want to improve your persuasiveness in group conversation, you must first make others like you. Getting the other person's love is sometimes very simple, just one sentence: what do you think?
You ask, "What do you think?" This question inspires thoughts and emotions. As soon as this sentence was spoken, your's relations changed from the antagonistic state of "us" and "them" to the cooperative state of fighting side by side and seeking solutions.
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Secondly, we should pay attention to two points when speaking in groups:
①? A picture is worth a thousand words. Concise and to the point. It is best to use photos, documents or other items to support your point of view. Don't state too many facts that are familiar or uncontroversial to both sides.
Don't ignore your parents' statements. If you can't refute the opinions put forward by your parents, or the request is harmless to you, then accept it, which will help convince you.
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Not knowing that you don't know is the most terrible thing. As a spear, influence can be used to convince others; As a shield, influence can prevent you from being fooled.
Frederick Douglass once said, "If I can convince others, I can turn the universe".
Then, if we let the other party agree in advance before we speak, it will undoubtedly make our actions smoother.
Having pre-emptive influence can help you win the game before you speak and teach you to find the best time to speak and do things. In order to help you create preemptive influence, the book "preemptive influence" summarizes three weapons to help you convince others.
? Privileged moment
It means that in a fleeting moment, if you can seize the opportunity to persuade, you will have the greatest strength.
For example, chestnuts, many people believe that one of the main reasons for the constellation personality test is that they seize the privileged moment to convince you, that is, to guide us to pay attention to their views and make us feel "very accurate."
There are two basic points to pay attention to: first, persuasion is the best when the mindset of others has not yet formed.
Second, it is much easier to let others become their allies psychologically and influence their own people than to influence "outsiders".
? Startup effect
It means that in the long process of human evolution, some shortcuts to quick decision-making are buried in genes. Once the persuaded person is activated, we will unconsciously be persuaded according to a fixed pattern.
In case of danger, the subconscious will have a strong tendency to join the group; For example, when we are in love and the romantic relationship is unfolding, we will want to avoid the group and subconsciously want to be the maverick protagonist in the romantic relationship.
If the result we want is to make people "conform", we must arouse people's sense of danger. If we want the result to be "maverick", we must arouse people's awareness of love.
When educating their children, many parents will also say, "Look how hard your classmate Xiaoming studies ..." Although it is always mentioned that "other people's children" will cause pressure on their children, it turns out that this persuasion will greatly promote the progress of their children.
? Focusing illusion
The attention resources of the brain are limited. When we deliberately pay attention to an element, as long as we pay limited attention to this element, we will mistakenly think that this element is very important and unconsciously associate this element with the main information we are thinking about. This is the focus illusion.
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For example, if you run a counseling institution, although teaching is the most important, in a well-decorated campus, parents will focus on comfort rather than price comparison.
In this poor environment, parents will first think of cost performance. Is it worth it to collect so much money to come to such a broken place?
summary
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There are so many methods and weapons mentioned above, but the most decisive point is always: we are good people.
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We hope to introduce institutional information honestly and fairly when facing parents, that is to say, we are responsible for the quality of teaching, and we are trying to describe the facts accurately instead of coveting our own interests.
In other words, no matter how skillfully we use the weapon of influence, the most essential and precious character will overcome everything.