The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is a special interpersonal relationship. Every family has more or less contradictions between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and these contradictions will also subtly affect the feelings between husband and wife.
I don't know if everyone has ever thought about why the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is generally difficult to get along with. In addition to the difficulties of both sides, it is more that the connection point between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is the same man, forming a triangular relationship, and congruent triangles is the most stable form. In this relationship, no matter which side is long or short, it will affect this stability.
However, this boundary and location are difficult to define, so from the initial contact between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, coupled with the age gap and different living environment, it is easy to "have a heart."
In fact, there is a very simple truth. Since both sides love this man, it is the greatest help for her son for her mother-in-law to transfer her love for her son to her daughter-in-law. After all, helping a daughter-in-law is helping a son. Daughter-in-law can respect her mother-in-law, not picky, and know more about each other's good, which is also a good medicine to consolidate the relationship between husband and wife.
Aunt Li, 67, lived a happy life in her later years. Many peers are concerned about and even worried about their own pension problems, but Aunt Li is down-to-earth in her heart.
When my daughter-in-law just married Aunt Li, she couldn't even cook, and Aunt Li didn't complain. All her sons are the same, she thought. This generation of children are the hands of their parents, with big babies in their hearts. Of course, they have just formed a small family and have to adapt slowly.
When the daughter-in-law gave birth to a child, she had no parenting experience. Aunt Li teaches her by hand, but she will take the initiative to help as long as she can help. When encountering the difference in parenting experience, Aunt Li's first thought is not to use the so-called experience to suppress it, but to immediately check the information and turn over the books to ensure that her parenting knowledge can keep pace with the times.
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Of course, in life, there is no tongue that does not touch the teeth. The two did have a small dispute, but on second thought, Aunt Li felt that this was all a son's love for his wife.
Sometimes Aunt Li Can will change her mind, and sometimes even if she gets along well with her daughter-in-law, she still has resentment in her heart. At this time, she will think about the hardships and tiredness of being a daughter-in-law, and think about it from the standpoint of a daughter-in-law, and her heart will be wider.
Before the daughter-in-law got pregnant smoothly, there was another episode. Daughter-in-law has been married for three or four years, and her stomach hasn't moved yet. Aunt Li was in a hurry, but she didn't show it in action or in her mouth. She comforted her daughter-in-law and even put forward advanced ideas. It was really impossible to choose dink at that time. Of course, in the end, my daughter-in-law gave birth to a child smoothly, but this affection is in my heart.
The relationship between people is mutual. Aunt Li is good for her son, good for her daughter-in-law, and sometimes even ignores her daughter-in-law when she is angry. It is also out of "disobedience", but what the daughter-in-law really sees is Aunt Li's help to herself bit by bit.
Fortunately, Aunt Li was rewarded in her later years. Aunt Li suffers from palpitation. Once the medicine was used up, Aunt Li asked her son to buy it. As a result, she forgot it in two days. Finally, the daughter-in-law listened to what Aunt Li said casually, and the next day she asked for the medicine and put it on Aunt Li's bedside.
On another occasion, Aunt Li was ill and hospitalized for surgery. She lay in the hospital for half a month, cooking for her every day, making porridge and soup, and even helping Aunt Li relieve herself.
At first, Aunt Li was very embarrassed and said to let her son come. As a result, the son hesitated, and no daughter-in-law responded quickly. Her daughter-in-law said that he is a big man and inconvenient. I am here. Call me.
During Aunt Li's hospitalization, her daughter-in-law lost a lot of weight after she was busy. After Aunt Li was discharged from the hospital, her daughter-in-law went home to help every day for half a month, and often told Aunt Li to pay attention to her health. Even after reviewing, my daughter-in-law wants to stay with Aunt Li.
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Aunt Li said many times in front of her son and relatives: "This man is the most reliable daughter-in-law in his later years. I didn't expect to spend so much effort to train his son. When he is old, he enjoys the blessing of his wife. " I used to be very kind to her, which is the best thing I have done in my life. "
In fact, mother-in-law and daughter-in-law have certain rules to follow, just like managing husband and wife. Below, I will give you an analysis of Aunt Li's "The Classic of Mother-in-law and Daughter-in-law":
First, don't always think your daughter-in-law is lazy. Modern women, like men, spend most of their time and energy on making money, and women should share half of the family economic pressure. When you think your daughter-in-law is going to accuse you of being lazy, look back at what your son is doing.
Second, the daughter-in-law is not her own after all. Some emotions should not be over-expressed. Be kind to your daughter-in-law when you are young, and you will enjoy happiness more easily in your later years. Whether you are kind to her with a little resentment or just for the sake of your son, what your daughter-in-law sees is your understanding and cherish after all.
Third, divide the boundaries between them. Many mother-in-law lose their sense of security once they can't control their son's life.
However, this kind of control and interference with small families is the most likely to cause disputes, but it will push the son's marriage into dire straits. A good mother-in-law should know that there is only one hostess in each family. Fourth, don't blame your daughter-in-law behind her back. There is no airtight wall in the world. Once your daughter-in-law knows that you speak ill of her in front of others or her husband, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will be difficult to repair.
After all, the daughter-in-law knows that her mother-in-law has two faces. Even if you are kind to her, she will doubt your sincerity and bury a misunderstanding. The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is difficult to get along with, but it can't be maintained by escaping. We should understand each other more, make more concessions and cherish more, so that the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will not be too bad. Even if your understanding, concession and cherish are only for the future happiness of your daughter-in-law, this process has also achieved the perfection of a family.