"What kind of psychological needs do men's girlfriends meet women? 》
Men's girlfriends are good, and women understand. They can be your trash can, drivers, bodyguards, intimate brothers, without complaint, relaxed companions and strong support. But from a psychological point of view, this is also the projection of male intentions in women's hearts, which helps them to stabilize their hearts, enrich their perspectives and make the relationship more complete through male girlfriends.
With the popularity of the TV series "I love a man's best friend", a man's best friend has become a fashionable word both in and out of the play. Take stock of the well-known male girlfriends: Cai Kangyong to Xiao S, Huang Xiaoming to Zhao Wei, He Jiong to Nana, Dai Jun to Jing Li ... With the development of society, women are no longer satisfied with the friendship between same-sex girlfriends. Because unlike same-sex girlfriends, male girlfriends can not only cry with you, laugh with you, be crazy with you, make fun with you, listen to you, lend you a shoulder to shelter you from the wind and rain, but also have in-depth spiritual exchanges with you from a male perspective.
According to survey data, 80% of women want to have male girlfriends. Women's desire for male girlfriends can be seen. In our small-scale survey of female white-collar workers around us, we found that women with male girlfriends are more attractive in conversation, and the indescribable happiness also makes women without male girlfriends full of envy, and of course it is inevitable to be suppressed, just with a jealous little head.
What kind of psychological needs do male girlfriends meet for women?
■ See the light from the chaos.
"My boyfriend is my spiritual mentor. He knows me very well and can communicate with me on the spiritual level. " Sun Yi, director of human resources, said with a smile, "Same-sex girlfriends can go shopping together, gossip together, talk about family and parenting together; Husband can raise children with himself and shoulder the economic responsibility of establishing a family; Male girlfriends only make up for the part that both husband and female girlfriends can't satisfy. If you compare life to a circle, life with boyfriend and girlfriend is complete. " Sun Yi's summary is in place. According to Dr. Zhang Peichao, a psychological counselor, male girlfriends really satisfy the feelings that husbands and ordinary friends can't satisfy. Husband satisfies men but not secrets, and female friends cannot satisfy men. Zhang Peichao believes that this is a kind of relationship similar to the transition object in the transition space, and it is a perfect relationship. For married women, if the husband can meet all the functions, then the function of male girlfriends will be weakened.
If plush toys, blankets and other things are the baby's transitional objects, when the mother is not around, it can give the baby a sense of security and comfort and drive away loneliness and anxiety. Male girlfriends can not only bring us emotional comfort, but also bring us substantial help. According to Lu Yue, a psychological counselor, male girlfriends provide a warm or cuddly relationship for women. "There may be two kinds of troubles in our life. One worry is that we are injured and need someone to hug us very much. But sometimes, our injury is a kind of confusion and needs a directional guidance. Because the male perspective is relatively rational and objective, it will not be so strongly wrapped by emotions, as if it can see the dawn from a mess. "
If the relationship between women and their husbands is not particularly good, they need friends of the opposite sex more, and they need to listen and understand from the perspective of men, even directional guidance.
■ Reflect the unknown self in the mirror.
In the communication with male girlfriends, women not only get listening, companionship and support, but also, in Zhang Peichao's view, this is a projection of women's own intentions, which helps them stabilize their inner structure through male girlfriends.
Jung, a psychologist, believes that every man has a female character and image in his subconscious-Anima; Accordingly, every woman unconsciously has a male character and image-animus. In the process of self-positioning and self-exploration, or how a person becomes himself, the most important thing is the integration with Anima/animus. In Rose's view, she and 18' s male girlfriends have always maintained a very close and pure friendship because of their mutual appreciation. "Men are relatively rational, think clearly, and make simple and direct decisions, which will tell you what impact this decision will have. The pros and cons are clear at a glance, and you can weigh them yourself and get out of bad emotions quickly. " Rose said that her current thinking was obviously influenced by her boyfriend.
For married women, if their male intentions are not fully reflected in their husbands, they may look for them in their male girlfriends. "Because a perfect personality needs two kinds of spiritual nourishment: fatherhood and motherhood. When a person is vulnerable, he needs an inner mother to hold him and give him a full sense of security. At the same time, he also needs an inner father to guide himself, improve himself and develop himself. " Lu Yue said.
■ Let's get in touch and enrich our relationship.
In fact, the existence of male girlfriends shows that the relationship between men and women in modern society is undergoing subtle changes, which is an improvement. According to Gao Xu of the Psychological Counseling Center of East China Jiaotong University, stable friendship is one of the important ways for modern women to live a healthy life. When women encounter problems and need to talk and vent, because of the high homogeneity between girlfriends, ideas, viewpoints and perspectives will become more and more similar. When encountering some troubles, such as emotional entanglements, it is not convenient to share with boyfriends or husbands, the advantages of male girlfriends are highlighted.
However, in the process of getting along with male girlfriends, Zhang Peichao believes that a good grasp is a enrichment of women's relations; If you don't grasp it well, it will bring you endless troubles. If your best friend can't do it, even your friend will lose one. Because, in the eyes of psychologists, as long as men and women walk together for a long time, erotic things will run out. This is also the root of many people questioning that there is no pure friendship between women and male girlfriends. In this regard, Rose specifically shared her experience: "The boundaries between the two sides are relatively clear. Although they appreciate each other, they both know clearly that the other is not their own dish. Because there is no concept of gender, both sides can talk about everything, including the relationship between men and women and share their feelings with each other. "
The appearance of male girlfriends has released some pent-up needs of women in the past. "But how to release this part of health can not only enjoy a diversified relationship, but also not lose yourself in the relationship. This may take longer and careful thinking, just like a partnership. " Zhang Peichao said. After all, if there is only spiritual communication between women and male girlfriends, everyone can stay out of it and stop immediately. This is actually a very remarkable human nature and spiritual realm.
So, do you want to practice yourself? Find a male girlfriend!
What kind of woman is more likely to have a boyfriend's secret
■ Can quickly capture each other's needs.
In particular, you can be caring and attentive. For example, if you see a man looking pale, tell him what seasonal soup is better to drink now. It's a little cold. Is it because you are wearing less clothes ... which makes men feel warm and like being taken care of?
■ I can stand up.
After the age of 30, women must rely on their own charm and be able to compete with men. Chai Jing, for example, was more than just an audience when she came into contact with the men's gang. She has her own thoughts, and can speak some sharp views from the perspective of women, which will be a good supplement to the male world. Men generally appreciate and appreciate such women, and relationships are easy to establish.
■ Boys who associate with men are better.
In family of origin, she can get along well with her father, brothers and uncles. When such a woman grows up, it is easy to get the support of her male friends.