Later, I also read some books on healing, such as plain black series. Among them, what moved me the most was Wu Zhihong's Why Home Hurts People. I also took many courses in psychology, but these courses were only superficial.
Learning psychological knowledge, on the one hand, is because of my own reasons, on the other hand, I once wanted to take an examination of psychological counselors with a utilitarian mentality to make a living.
But then I gave up. The reason for giving up is that one day I found that being a psychologist often faces the negative energy of patients' overload. At that time and even now, I was always surrounded by negative energy. I clearly realize that as a psychologist, you should have excellent emotional control and strong self-healing ability-and I can't do it yet.
Coincidentally, the book "Internal Therapy" just verified my point of view: when the psychological doctor's own state is very bad, the effect of treating patients will be very poor, and it may make the situation of both doctors and patients worse.
Christopher Andre, a famous French psychologist, psychiatrist and best-selling author, is the author of "Inner Healing". He was born in Montpellier, southern France, and currently works in Santa Anna Mental Hospital in Paris. He has published a series of Douban high-scoring "Intimate Books".
Christopher Andrei summed up several elements that an excellent psychologist should possess in his book Internal Healing:
1. professional knowledge,
2. Willing to answer patients' questions patiently and explain their own workflow.
In the face of patients, you should be able to keep your emotions in the best condition, which is consistent with what I summarized before.
4. Psychologists should be able to set an example, be a model of physical and mental health, and be a model who knows how to regulate physical and mental health.
5. More experience: If you have experienced difficulties and finally solved them, it will be easier to feel the patient's situation and more conducive to treatment.
What book is this?
The book "Internal Therapy" is about 15 how psychologists use their professional knowledge to help them overcome their difficulties when facing their own problems, so as to explore some effective treatment methods and then use these methods to help their patients.
In the process of reading this book, if you encounter something similar to your own situation, you can try to use the method of psychological doctor to self-heal, but these can only be used as reference, not blindly follow. If the methods in the book can't solve our own problems, we still have to go to a psychologist for face-to-face treatment.
The cases listed in the book cover a wide range: health, society, interpersonal, family, gender, children's education and so on. Reading this book gives me a close look at the inner world of psychologists. Like ordinary people, even with professional psychological knowledge and rich practical experience, they will still encounter psychological problems in real life: some people have been knocked down, some people have easily weathered the difficulties, and some people are still struggling with their own "diseases."
But all psychologists who can come out can face up to their psychological problems and then help them solve them with professional psychological knowledge. It is also very important for them to know how to seek help from the outside world in time.
What valuable content did I get from the book?
Everyone's situation is different, so the choice method is different. Every therapy listed in the book Internal Therapy has its value, but according to my own actual situation, I think the following two are quite interesting:
I used to be a patient with extreme social phobia. I don't want to go out unless I have to. I have always been in a "transparent" state in the group. Once I couldn't help talking and blushed. This blush has bothered me for a long time. Fortunately, it is much better now. If I had read this book, I might not have solved it so long.
My blushing state is equivalent to social anxiety in psychiatry, which is related to self-esteem, social skills, self-suggestion ability, personality, body language and so on.
Want to get rid of the embarrassment of easy to blush, the author told us that we can expose ourselves:
1. Expose yourself to the selected situation and persist for a long time until the discomfort is reduced to more than 50%.
2. After self-disclosure, it is best to stay for a few more minutes in this situation to make sure that your anxiety has not rebounded.
If you feel that you really can't control this or that situation, don't force yourself. You can rearrange your fears, starting with the easiest.
It takes a long process to change completely, and you need to be patient enough. Don't deny yourself casually.
Now some scenes will still blush, but they will not give themselves too much psychological burden as before. Once you encounter such a situation, immediately divert your attention and don't take it seriously: let nature take its course and fight for its inevitability.
In the book Inner Healing, a psychologist named Giselle George proposed an interesting solution: the integral game.
Parents and children negotiate, then make a weekly list and fill in a series of tasks that must be completed. According to the actual age of the child, it is difficult to choose the task to fill in. Dr. George particularly emphasized that children should never be given negative marks or deducted points when grading, and the focus should be on children's scores. I think it's really good that it doesn't hurt children.
Dr. George also gave an advanced version of the integral game, and there are many suggestions and methods he got in practice, which are especially helpful to parents who are worried about how to help their children develop good living habits. I suggest you read this part.
Conclusion: Even psychologists need to work hard again and again to overcome difficulties when they encounter psychological problems, so it is necessary for ordinary people to learn some psychological healing methods to "protect themselves". At the same time, studying psychology can also help us better understand others and help relatives and friends in the right way when they encounter related problems.