The relationship between consultants and visitors.
1. "Problem" is what visitors want to change. When visitors discuss their problems, counselors need to find and confirm that these problems really bring difficulties to visitors and face up to their feelings. However, if the counselor assumes that there is a potential meaning behind the question, the counselor's professional knowledge will dominate the whole conversation, and it is difficult to focus on the visitor's narrative.
The problem is not a problem, but an opportunity for change. In the above content, I saw the words confirm, confirm and confirm. What is confirmation, confirmation, confirmation? It's the difficulties and feelings of visitors, which reminds me of a case I just saw. When Jessica appears, how should we, as consultants, confirm, confirm and reconfirm his feelings? Do we really need to walk into his thinking structure? Do we really need to feel his feelings? In the last sentence, he should be the reverse explanation of the previous sentence. If the consultant assumes the potential meaning behind the problem, what is the potential meaning? Is it what we call presupposition and labeling, which is the so-called diagnosis?
2. The goal of the focus-solving orientation counselor is set by the visitor. Psychological counselors need to find and establish the goals that visitors want to achieve within the scope permitted by law. This sentence can be transformed into a positive, desired, concrete and measurable goal.
3. The direction of counselor meeting is the goal of visitors. Counselors need to believe that visitors know when the consultation will end and whether it is useful or not. Visitors have the resources, skills and advantages to solve problems, and maybe they haven't discovered them yet. The consultant's job is to ask himself how to talk to visitors and make them notice these abilities.
This is the target framework of focus solution. How can consultants talk to visitors and make them notice that they have these abilities? In other words, we take the key solution as a consultation plaque for asking questions. What kind of questions do we use to let the visitor know that he knows?
Consultants should not try to tell visitors how to solve their problems. This is the cooperation between consultants and visitors, which forms a unique solution for visitors through talks, and leaves a certain space for visitors' unique values, beliefs and cultural background when defining what is the right thing.
This is the double expert mode of focus solution. Counselors don't try to tell visitors how to solve problems. We believe that he is an expert in solving problems, focusing on visitors. We will discuss with him to build it together.
No matter what visitors do, we all think this is their best auxiliary treatment. After reading this, we will know that the so-called impedance has come out. Once the counselor thinks that the visitor shows "resistance", it means that the counselor is not trying to listen to the visitor or needs to do something different. In sfbt, no matter how visitors respond, there is no "wrong" answer.
There is no absolute truth, only real existence. In the visitor's subjective framework, his thoughts and practices are correct. What we need to do is to find a more suitable way to cooperate with tourists.
6. The professionalism of consultants is reflected in communicating with visitors and thinking about how visitors can find solutions. Counselors construct questions according to visitors' answers, and usually quote what visitors have just said into new questions, which can help visitors explore themselves further. In this case, the relationship between the visitor and himself is more important than the relationship between the visitor and the consultant.
The professionalism of consultants is reflected in communicating with visitors and thinking about how visitors can find solutions. After reading this, I think we are experts in helping others among the experts who have mastered psychological knowledge. What do we mean by this kind of communication and thinking? Do you ask visitors for advice? This attitude of communication and thinking has always existed in the process of consulting visitors. What does this attitude of communication and thinking include? I think a very important aspect of this kind of communication and thinking is what we see, hear and understand. We should see that we should find the bright spot in visitors, and we should listen to people with constructive solutions. We should not only listen to what visitors seem to have, but also listen to what they don't have. This is what we need to do in the process of communication+thinking, that is, ask visitors for advice.
In the consulting room, the relationship between visitors and themselves is more important than the relationship between visitors and consultants. What does this mean? I think the relationship between visitors and themselves is the "self-exploration" mentioned above. This kind of self-exploration reminds me of "confirming perception and expanding perception". In the consulting room, what the consultant should do is to confirm the perception of the visitors step by step and expand the perception of the visitors step by step. Whether it is confirmation or expansion, we are only assisting in this process. So for the visitor, this is a process of exploration, and he is active.
Make a small summary and summary of the relationship between focus-solving consultants and visitors:
1. We are a cooperative team and have a cooperative relationship with visitors. This cooperation is reflected in the fact that consultants and visitors have the same goal. Counselors and visitors work together. I think this is the most basic feature of trying to solve the relationship between consultation and interview, and it is also the core part mentioned in the book.
2. On this basis, this cooperative relationship is an equal cooperative relationship. Where is this equality reflected? I think it is still reflected in the double expert model that we often say, which is a very vivid interpretation. I think if there is a third eye in the clinic, if you look at the consultant from the perspective of the third eye, then the consultant must be really curious and really humble to consult the visitors.
3. It is the so-called impedance, as Ms. Yin Su said: "Visitors who have never had impedance are only consultants who don't know how to change, and only consultants who need to find new ways of cooperation."