Do something wrong and offend people.
Speaking without considering the feelings of the other party, doing things carelessly, disrespecting others, and not being strict with your mouth may all lead to being squeezed out by your colleagues.
There is a graduate student Xiao Liu in my unit, who belongs to the kind of honest and frank. She has strong working ability, but she doesn't recruit leaders, and her colleagues are far away from her.
On one occasion, she and I accompanied the leader on a business trip. Help the leader carry the bag all the way. Wherever she goes, she only takes her own things. No matter how many things I have, she never helps.
When I arrived at the hotel, she told me that there was no need to carry a bag for the leader. We are here to work, not to serve the leaders. Besides, leaders have their own hands, so there is no need to curry favor with them.
Hearing this, I felt ironic and uncomfortable. On another occasion, several of us went to the canteen to eat, and one of us smelled of body odor. Xiao Liu is very taboo and never sits with him.
Unfortunately, that time, this colleague happened to sit next to her. Most people just put up with it, and she actually said loudly, Oh, don't sit next to me, my nose can't stand it. As a result, everyone was embarrassed.
She not only takes care of her colleagues personally, but also takes care of her leaders. After a long time, everyone doesn't want to play with her. Up to now, there is no one around her.
It is a basic workplace rule not to poke others' pain points, not to expose shortcomings, and not to embarrass others. If it is destroyed, the consequences will be very serious. Lightly, colleagues alienate you; What's more, he was retaliated by the villains.
Instead of complaining about your colleagues crowding you out, think about whether you are wrong or not.
Outstanding ability leads to jealousy.
There are always some people who don't like the goodness of others. The better you are, the worse they are. Especially in competitive relations, it is common to create obstacles for you and spread rumors.
I witnessed the struggle between the director and the deputy director of the unit. At that time, the unit changed its top leader, and the new leader appreciated the deputy director very much, often surpassing the director to arrange work for the deputy director. The deputy director only cares about work. When he received the task, he threw himself into his work at the first time and didn't realize that he should report to the director, which led to many working directors not knowing.
It happens that the director is a narrow-minded person and attaches great importance to power. The deputy director's approach made the director feel a great threat. So the director often tells me that the deputy director is not good, suggesting that I will not do it if the deputy director gives me a job; When communicating with other departments, he always speaks ill of the deputy director by innuendo.
Slowly, the unit spread all kinds of rumors about the deputy director. Although I know that the deputy director is not that kind of person, there are many criticisms, and the deputy director has one hundred opinions. The rumor reached the ears of the new leader, who also talked to the deputy director, and then he didn't need the deputy director.
Excellent ability is a good thing. If you don't know how to keep a low profile, you will only attract the wind and turn advantages into disadvantages.
Too calculating, annoying
We often say that it is hard to be confused. Sometimes, knowing each other's thoughts, I choose not to tell the truth, in order to save his face and take the next step.
But it happened that some people, climbing up the pole, took the goodwill of others as fools and tried their best to take advantage. You must have met such a person. He talks about how to be good to you. When you are in trouble, he stays away from you. Everyone worked overtime, and he made an excuse to slip away; Don't say what benefits you want, encourage you to be a bad person; All kinds of diligence in front of leaders, and all kinds of prevarication behind leaders.
After a long time, people will see people clearly. After a long time, everyone knows, deliberately avoiding the intersection with such people. Don't contact them if you can't contact them. Be wary of him, afraid of being calculated by him.
If you encounter cold violence in the workplace, you can see if it is because you are too smart and never suffer, which leads to a narrower road.
Whatever the reason, if you are unfortunate enough to encounter cold violence in the workplace and be isolated and rejected by your colleagues, you are not advised to hold a Buddhist attitude, but to face it positively and resolve the embarrassment. After all, it is good for you to look up every day and not see it, and to create a harmonious working atmosphere.
Teach you four tricks to resolve cold violence in the workplace.
1. Be modest
Trees attract the wind. No matter what education or experience you have, you will start from scratch when you enter the company. Put away your edge, you can't go wrong with caution. People don't target an ordinary person for no reason. It must be that some of your characteristics or behaviors have caused others' dissatisfaction.
Some people, with deep backgrounds and strong connections, never show off or show off; Some people, with good families, still wear simple clothes and go to work by bus. Such people are all smart people. Just like in martial arts novels, those experts with profound internal skills look ordinary and even a little silly. Such an appearance can easily let the enemy relax their vigilance. Especially those who offend colleagues because of misconduct, must learn to keep a low profile.
Don't make public the benefits, don't praise them, speak carefully, don't poke people's pain points, be sweet, be polite and tolerant, and everyone will naturally be polite to you.
deliver charcoal to sb's doorsteps in snowy weather—provide/render timely help
If you want to turn an enemy into a friend, you should treat him like a friend. It is a great spirit not to hold grudges or care.
When colleagues are isolated, it is easy for us to be hostile to each other, look at each other unhappily, take things hard, and even find fault and fight within ourselves. In fact, this practice is not worth the loss, and the internal friction is great. If you can't solve the fundamental problem, it's better to be soft and hard.
For example, knowing that the other person is not good to you, you still treat each other honestly and take the initiative to let go of hostility. When the other party encounters difficulties, they lend a helping hand, share a work skill, help to consult a document, and facilitate computer repair. When you meet a group activity, have a good talk with everyone, have a meal, and resolve conflicts through laughter.
In the face of people who don't like themselves, it seems difficult to hide their unhappiness and take the initiative to show good. You can take this as a good opportunity to exercise us. After all, useful experience is accumulated bit by bit in practice.
To be a great person, you have to force yourself to do what others don't want to do.
Break them one by one
This is very suitable for being isolated by small groups as a whole. People who have no way will only feel sad secretly, and smart people will find ways to turn defeat into victory. In small groups, there are leaders and followers who don't know. You can win over these indecisive people. Their weakness is that they have no opinions, and they are afraid of offending others and following the trend. You can start with these people and get the information you want.
For example, ask him to go to the canteen for dinner, go shopping and go to work together. Once or twice, he may not go. If you call him back, he is always embarrassed to refuse. Get along more, you naturally know why they isolate you, and only when you know the reasons can you have countermeasures. There is another kind of people you can use, that is, people who are isolated like you. Because they have the same experience, they are more likely to have empathy than others. You can unite such people and form your own strength.
To survive within the system, we can't be partial, but we can't help it. The most important thing to cultivate your own strength is to protect yourself. At least people won't do it easily when they want to frame you. This kind of survival wisdom is what each of us should have.
After all, survival first, then development, is an even older and unchanging truth, which also applies to the workplace.
Fight back at the right time
Being proactive, modest and low-key, does not mean that we have to be soft persimmons. When we should be tough, we should be tough. When others insult you in public, you submit to humiliation, which is not tolerance, but cowardice. Say what you have to say, just pay attention to the object and speaking skills.
There are two conventional ways to fight back: one is language, and the other is strength. For example, if the other person satirizes your hypocritical diligence and love performance, you can say, "That's better than that. Some people don't even have the ability to pretend to be diligent. "
Language can only indulge in words, and the most important thing is to speak with strength.
When your ability is improved, you become a person that leaders depend on. Others dare not crowd you out easily, because you are valuable and maybe you can help your colleagues.
People tend to seek advantages and avoid disadvantages. When you are weak, the people who bully you are the most. You are strong, surrounded by smiling faces, and they will only be good to you, not enemies.
Some people say it's tiring. We are not RMB, so it is impossible for everyone to like it. Survive within the system and learn more strategies, not to harm others, but to protect themselves when encountering difficulties.