I have seen many similar cases in which women complain that their marriages are not harmonious and their husbands are not good to them. From the Buddhist point of view, they all hurt each other from the end of their lives. In this life, as husbands, they collect debts through marriage.
Therefore, if you want to resolve this disharmonious relationship, you first need to recognize this causal relationship, stop complaining and accusing, but try to understand each other's attitudes and behaviors, repent and compensate for the harm you have caused to each other.
Then you will find a * * * same result. These women in the case will give feedback after practicing these methods. Their husbands will have some changes more or less, such as being gentle with themselves and loving themselves more.
Then, they will say that the power of Buddha and Bodhisattva is really great. Although my husband didn't do anything, many changes did take place. Our marriage is getting more and more harmonious now.
Seeing this, people without religious beliefs may feel absurd and superstitious.
However, after reading the psychological counseling cases mentioned at the beginning of the article, I found that what seems absurd and superstitious is actually the same.
Psychology believes that in relationships, people's behaviors shape and influence each other. When one person changes, the other person in the relationship will also change, because their relationship is a system, and this system is like an interlocking chain. They are all a link in this system. If this link changes, other links will also change and make adjustments.
Therefore, it is very logical to use this theory to explain the above behavior changes.
For example, husbands often come home late or not, and wives suffer from waiting. As soon as the husband came home, he pulled a face and accused him, which made him even more reluctant to go home and face his wife. The less he goes home, the angrier his wife gets. In such a vicious circle, if a woman wants to change, she can't continue to blame, but one party makes changes first to influence the other. In this way, the vicious circle can be stopped and gradually reversed into a virtuous circle.
Don't think I've changed, not him.
We can't change because of other people's behavior, but what we can change is ourselves. My active change will bring his passive change.
Finally, what kind of relationship you want depends on yourself.