Before talking about this case, I should first talk about my mental journey in the field of psychological counseling.
When I first started to take the national second-level psychological counselor exam, I just thought that this industry would be a sunrise industry in the future and will certainly flourish. From a business point of view, I think the first move is the strongest, and I got the national second-level psychological counselor at the fastest speed. At the same time, I took part-time psychological cases and set up my own psychological studio.
I have been doing marketing management since I left the state-owned enterprise, so I learned some marketing psychology. When I first took the case, I saw that people who came to the studio for psychological counseling were depressed or heavy. It was a kind of joy, a sense of satisfaction and a sense of accomplishment. This sense of satisfaction and accomplishment came to an abrupt end in a psychological case of 20 10 and 12.
The case is actually very simple, that is, a boy in Grade Two, who has been addicted to online games for more than a year, doesn't like learning, doesn't like talking, is withdrawn and sometimes has a bad temper. From being admitted to junior high school, 15, to the mid-term exam of the second grade, she fell behind to 87, that is, more than a dozen. In order to prevent him from surfing the Internet, the Internet cable and TV were cut off at home, and his mother sent him to school every time. . . I tried my best, but I still couldn't stop him from skipping classes and surfing the Internet in Internet cafes. His mother took him to a famous hospital for a related scale examination. He is prone to depression and mania. This boy is more repulsive to the male psychological counselor in the hospital. Introduce him to me. Through telephone communication, I learned that their family is in a rural area in Baoji area and went to Xi 'an to do psychological cases. In order to save money, they need to take the train after 5: 00 in the morning. After more than five hours, they will arrive in Xi 'an at about 1 1: 30, and then return by the train at 8: 00 in the afternoon. His mother whispered to me that this is the last time to pay for this child, because the education of this son has caused great cracks and contradictions between husband and wife. . .
For the first time, his mother was short and thin, with her one-year-old daughter in her arms. When she entered the door, a chill hit her face. When she poured them a cup of hot water and handed it to his mother, she accidentally touched his mother's hand, which was cold and rough, while the little daughter in her arms, her nose and face were red with cold. And that boy, from the moment he entered the room, kept his hands clasped, his head bowed and he was silent. Maybe it's all mom. At that moment, my heart was inexplicably tight and painful.
After a brief communication with his mother, I hope her mother can leave the consulting room temporarily so that I can communicate with his son. Hearing this, his mother was about to go out with her child in her arms. I said it's too cold outside. Let's go to another room. His mother quickly shook her head and refused, saying that she would go out for a walk. In fact, I know that she is afraid that her presence will affect her son's mood.
I finished the case that day and gave the boy homework. At the same time, I suggested to his mother that for the sake of the child, I hope that one day the father of the child can come to my studio for family therapy. . .
In the fourth case, the child's parents come to the studio together. I asked my father to listen to the child's voice first, and then let the child listen to the voice of his father and mother. Finally, I asked my father and mother to hug their son. The simple and honest father, who didn't know how to express his feelings, clumsily hugged his wife and children, and his son burst into tears, while his mother wailed. At that moment, I saw a family about to fall apart, a family facing disintegration. It was also at that moment that I suddenly felt that psychological counseling was a great career. He can not only pull back a person, but sometimes even save a family, a family. At that moment, I was no longer proud of my work ability, but a sense of mission from the bottom of my heart. At that moment, when I saw their father holding their son's hand and their mother holding his father's arm and smiling goodbye to me, I felt a kind of happiness.
From then on, the psychological counselor is not just my profession, but my mission, a mission to meet us, and a person who can make everyone depressed or misunderstood because of my appearance become smart.
This case is also a milestone in my spiritual growth. From 20 15, when I was doing psychological public welfare courses in drug rehabilitation centers, this sense of mission became more and more clear.
I very much agree that psychological counselors help others help themselves, but at the same time I agree more: I want to be a sentient being, but I am being a sentient being! I wanted to help others, but in the end I became one of those who wanted to help. What I understand now is that I wanted to help others, but I asked the people I helped to sublimate me. )
Finally, I hope that people who read this article today will learn to listen, hug and stare at you gently. This is the best method for their family and the strongest psychological technology!
This is a job to help others and help themselves! Whenever I see tourists rekindling their hopes for the future life, it is also my happiest time! I will continue to learn and grow, hoping to help more children.
Since I joined the ranks of consultants, the word "feeling" has a special meaning to me. Because I began to pay attention to the feelings of others, gain insight into the feelings of visiting, explore the feelings of visiting, and feel the feelings of others. So I learned to respect other people's feelings and enjoy good feelings in my life.
When I have my own feelings in my life and can understand and respect the feelings of others, "feelings" are particularly meaningful to me, so I also pay special attention to the feelings I bring to others and my own inner feelings.
When you know how to keep good feelings and bad feelings, your heart is really good and happy.
So the experience in my life is to know and understand bad feelings, and then make peace with them. Our feelings are good feelings.
My harvest is that while I feel my own feelings, I can also feel the feelings of many people. Therefore, what I have gained in my life is more colorful and happy feelings!
Helping others is helping yourself.
Yesterday, I just finished the internal training of a college peer counselor. At the beginning, I shared the changes of my first child in this school (of course, I also asked my child's consent before sharing).
At the beginning, severe depression may be suicidal at any time, and there is a strong unexpressed aggression in it. In the previous consultation, the child will share with you the real experience of dragging her classmates to the rooftop and preparing to jump from the upstairs after the consultation last week, but in the end she chose to come down from the roof. But when we met for the fifth time, the child actually told me, teacher, what's it like to be in love? I want to fall in love!
After that, our conversation is no longer a heavy and depressing topic, but how to live better. We explored many aspects of life that she had never touched before, and she also showed unparalleled imagination and creativity in the process, just like Disney's DreamWorks, magical and wonderful! Later, she really fell in love. I think she may still have negative emotions and challenges, but I believe she has enough courage and wisdom to overcome them!
What makes me more gratified is that such examples abound in our consulting room!
As a consultant, the greatest happiness does not depend on clients and how much consulting fees they get, but on seeing their growth and transformation. When they die in despair, they will find the happiness and meaning of life again through my company! Really, really happy for them!
If it has any influence on me, I want to say that I am honored to be a consultant and have witnessed so many miracles of life!
I firmly believe that life is self-sufficient and everything is the best arrangement!
Thank them for letting me experience so much pain in my life, and let me see how tenacious the vitality is, and let me see that love makes the world full of hope!
What do you think is your feeling or influence as a counselor?
Psychological consultation is defined in the textbook of national vocational qualification examination for psychological counselors. Psychological counseling is a profession in which psychological counselors use psychological techniques and skills to help people (visitors) with psychological problems solve psychological problems, get rid of pain, eliminate psychological related symptoms, restore normal work and study life, enhance self-confidence and improve personality.
This definition stipulates the scope of work, responsibilities, rights and obligations of psychological counselors, and also ensures that psychological counselors operate on a normal track.
If visitors meet such a counselor, with the help and guidance of the counselor, they really solve a lot of confusion and pain, and their inner anxiety conflicts are obviously reduced or even not felt. If he can work, study and live normally as before, and his heart becomes stronger, his adaptability is enhanced and his ability to resist blows is improved, then the consultation is effective and successful.
If you have done psychological counseling several times or even for a long time, you don't feel any change, the pain remains, you can't work, study and live normally, and you are still very sensitive. Even if you don't take responsibility, then this counseling is invalid and failed. At this time, visitors will not have a good impression on psychological counselors.
I'm a counselor. I hope that people (visitors) with psychological problems can meet psychological counselors who can solve problems efficiently, and with their active cooperation, get rid of the pain as soon as possible and return to normal work, study and life.