Chapter 1: Do you have the eggshell effect?
Chapter 2: Depression is prone to hallucinations.
Chapter 3: What about procrastination?
Our spiritual world is mysterious and fragile. Sometimes it looks well disguised, but once it is knocked, it will be completely broken like an eggshell. How can we avoid this situation? Let's take a look at Bian Xiao below!
Do you have eggshell effect?
The human mind is a mysterious world. When it loses confidence and doesn't know how to face failure, it will close itself like an "eggshell": it is tight enough to keep everyone out of the shell; She is very fragile. A small blow may make her collapse and arouse strong revenge. This is a common "eggshell psychology" and it is not difficult to eliminate it. As long as you keep moderate expectations, don't deny yourself easily, and give your mind an "exit", the "eggshell effect" will disappear.
Eggshell effect is a physiological and psychological disease first proposed and named by British child psychologist Simon Anne in 1965. Refers to the child's fragile psychology, such as only listening to compliments and not listening to any objections. Some children are arrogant in appearance, fragile in heart, sensitive and suspicious; Some children can only accept success, but cannot face failure. If something goes wrong, they will take extreme actions and even commit suicide. This is the so-called "eggshell psychology", and fragility is its essence.
In today's society, many adults also suffer from the "eggshell effect": in 2009, a university professor in a provincial university committed suicide because of the welfare problem of the unit, and he was named; 20 1 1 In August, a man had a conflict with the staff of an employment agency in Baoan District, Shenzhen when he failed to get a refund. The man stabbed three staff members of the agency with a knife, one of whom died on the spot and two were injured. After that, the man cut his throat and committed suicide.
It can be seen that the "eggshell effect" is light, which is easy to produce negative psychology and affect the quality of work and life. Those who make people go to extremes in impulse lead to incalculable tragedies. So how to solve this "eggshell effect"? You might as well do this:
We should be aware of setbacks.
How can the road of life be as warm as spring in the alternation of wind and rain? In academic and interpersonal communication, everyone may encounter setbacks, which are objective and should be psychologically prepared. -eggshells may break at any time.
See both sides of setbacks.
Although setbacks can make people suffer, on the other hand, they can also hone their will. When encountering setbacks, don't just see the negative side, but treat them with an optimistic attitude. In this way, frustration will become a whetstone for your success. At all times and in all countries, there are countless examples of "turning grief into strength" in adversity, thus leading to success.
Design appropriate self-expectations.
If a person lacks a comprehensive understanding of his abilities, interests and hobbies, it is easy for him to have self-doubt and think that he can't do it. In fact, it is likely that there are some problems with his self-expectation.
For example, I have a friend who is determined to be a host. After graduating from the University Broadcasting and Media Department, I went to various TV stations to apply for dozens of times. Every interview failed, and he was once disheartened. Later, one of his teachers reminded him that since you are good at writing, why can't you do writing? He changed his mind, went to a magazine to apply for a job and was interviewed and accepted. After several years of hard work, he is now the executive editor of that magazine.
Too depressed to hallucinate.
Lao Wang turned on the TV and said that he was called timid, timid and shameful. He told his wife that she listened carefully to the sound of TV, and there was no sound except the dialogue of the characters in the TV series. My wife said, "You must have misheard me. Which one has a sound? " Lao Wang still doesn't believe it. He insisted that a voice on TV scolded him and asked to turn off the TV. When his wife turned off the TV, Lao Wang said, "My voice is gone." So I turned on the TV again, but as soon as the TV turned on, Lao Wang's voice appeared again. So, television
Lao Wang opened and closed it again, and his wife was puzzled. What happened to Lao Wang? Are you out of your mind?
The next day, Lao Wang and his wife went to the hospital for examination. The physical examination was normal and no organic diseases were found. The doctor suggested going to the psychiatric department, and the psychiatrist diagnosed it as functional hallucination. It turns out that Lao Wang himself is introverted, doesn't like to talk about life, and thinks too much about things. After retirement, he was addicted to playing chess and spent several hours with his chess friends every day. His wife thought her entertainment was good after retirement, so she left it alone. Who would have thought that old Wang Qian would win after playing chess for a few days? He hesitated and thought for a long time when playing chess. The chess watchers laughed at him, and he made mistakes when he was in a hurry. As a result, the other side turned defeat into victory and won Lao Wang. Lao Wang came home depressed and didn't want to go out to play chess. He also has the above symptoms.
According to different sensory organs, hallucinations can be divided into auditory hallucinations and hallucinations. According to different conditions, there are different types of hallucinations, and functional hallucinations are one of them.
Functional illusion is an illusion accompanied by realistic stimulation. For example, patients hear footsteps and talk about their own voices. The former is a real voice, and the latter is an illusion. When patients see the blue sky, they will also see horrible pictures. The former is a real image and the latter is an illusion. There is an old saying that "once bitten, twice shy", which means that some people feel scared when they see the rope. This is a functional illusion, because the two cannot appear at the same time, only snakes or ropes can be seen. This proverb is because people's thinking is visual, and because the characteristics of rope are similar to snakes, people who have been bitten by snakes will unconsciously think of snakes when they see the rope.
Real perception and hallucination are perceived by patients at the same time, and they do not blend with each other. When the real perception disappears, the illusion disappears, and when the real perception reappears, the illusion reappears. Functional hallucinations are more common in schizophrenia. When similar symptoms appear, you should go to the hospital for professional help in time.
What about procrastination?
To get rid of procrastination, we must first distinguish the importance of things. Divide things into: important and urgent, important and not urgent, urgent and not urgent and not important. The so-called "important emergencies", such as leaders' urgent need for meeting materials and disputes with customers. We should deal with similar things at once. The so-called "importance is not urgent", such as attending continuing education and maintaining good relations with colleagues. As long as there is no emergency, it should be given priority.
Encourage yourself with positive words.
The inner dialogue of procrastinators is often "they forced me to do it" and "I can't do anything". These thoughts imply that they are victims. At this time, you might as well change your strategy and give me a hint with a positive self. "This question is difficult, but what can I do?" And "I can try this method" instead of "I don't know where to start" and "I'll start in an hour" instead of "there are too many tasks to finish"
Break down complex things into concrete steps.
For example, you need to give a speech to hundreds of people. This sounds like a rather difficult task, but it can actually be divided into several steps. You need to determine a novel topic, then make an outline, find some key data and examples, string them together, then practice and modify them according to the draft, and finally consult the conference organizer. These steps sound very feasible.
Procrastinators may have three different situations: the first is that people who don't ask others seriously delay the progress of their work. Second, excessive pursuit of perfection, we must find the best way of employment. Third, I am used to finding various reasons, and I have to wait until the last minute to work overtime to catch up with the progress. They are worried that they can't meet the standards and are afraid of being criticized.
1. If you are omnipotent, learn to refuse other people's demands and don't let extra burdens interfere with your normal work.
2. If you are a perfectionist, you should discuss with other colleagues or report the progress to the leader anytime and anywhere, and modify the defects in the plan in time.
If you are a fearful person, you should communicate with the leader in advance and try to finish it a few days in advance, so that you have a few days to revise and adjust, which can greatly reduce your psychological burden.
Conclusion: Frustration is a compulsory course in our life, and no one can have a smooth life. When encountering setbacks, don't just see the negative side, but treat it with an optimistic attitude, so that you can have a healthier psychology. (The article was originally published in Psychology and Health, serial number: 2065438+March 2002, by Yan Hua, Sai Liyang and Liu Yulin. Copyright belongs to the author; The purpose of reprinting is to convey more information, which does not mean that 360 Common Sense Network agrees with its views and is responsible for its authenticity. Please contact us as soon as possible and we will delete the content as soon as possible.