Experts answer common emotional questions for you.
0 1Q: How to bid farewell to being single?
A: There are probably three kinds of friends who ask this question: the boys and girls in Seeds of Love, the "leftover men and women" who are older and unmarried, and the "looking for someone" in the window is empty. The first reason why they want to fall in love is hormonal, the second is forced by reality, and the third is that they don't want to be alone (or separated). My idea is, if you don't meet true love, don't fall in love rashly. Just look for sustenance, dependence and substitution, and the result will only be harm to others and yourself. There is a saying that "being single is the best appreciation period". It is better to improve yourself, from the inside out. Don't believe those love strategies, learn those offensive routines, and the most important thing is to be the best of yourself and wait for the right person with the truest heart.
Q: Should I be with TA?
A: You have a date, but you are not sure about the relationship, or you are always uncertain about the relationship. I think there are two reasons:
(1) You don't love TA enough. You and TA came together because of some realistic conditions, or just because of loneliness. My answer is that if I live with someone I don't love, I will become confused every day. Without unrequited love, you won't feel at home.
(2)TA doesn't love you enough. You can be sure of your feelings, but you don't know whether TA is as small as you.
Q: TA doesn't love me. Should I let go or fight?
A: This question depends on the reason why TA doesn't love you. TA was born in cool thin, and she has problems with her moral feelings, or you have different views, and the love mode conflicts. Please let go. If you are not good enough, you can fight for it.
Q: Does TA love me?
A: First of all, I have a very pessimistic view that can make you ask this sentence, which basically shows that TA doesn't love you, at least not enough. But it doesn't rule out that you are suspicious by nature, and TA can't express it. Secondly, if you really want to say the standard, according to human nature, the first love period can be three days without contact, and certainly not enough love for you, at most a week. Love depends on the performance of quarreling. No matter how good it is at ordinary times, quarreling regardless of your own safety and feelings is definitely not true love. The stable period depends on whether TA is planning for your future and working hard. If the enthusiasm fades, only escape, obviously not serious. If these points are unfortunate, please look down.
Q: How can I get it?
A: Don't take efforts as the antonym of letting go. Only by letting go can we achieve our goal. Admit failure, see shortcomings and overcome control. "You must love me! Please love me in my way. " If you fall in love with this posture, you will only lose even worse. Instead, point your strength at yourself and pay attention to your heart, where there is something missing or deceived. Remember, the reason for not being loved must not be superficial. A woman with perfect heart will not be so ugly, and a man with strength will not be so poor. Only when a person's mind grows in place can he live clearly and make others inseparable.
Q: How can I put it down?
A: Let me ask you a rhetorical question first. It is inappropriate to know that the other person does not love you. Why don't you let go? You say it's because you love TA? Wrong. Love is an emotion that needs to be answered. As long as he is a normal person, he will not be abused by people who don't love him. If it's really good for TA, then let go and make TA happy. The essence of your so-called "can't let go" is unwilling. I don't want to be unloved or rejected. Therefore, learning to admit defeat, accepting that you are not good enough, and facing the fact that TA will not change for you is the key to letting go.
Q: What should I do if I am betrayed by my lover?
A: First of all, don't let hatred run out. Love will never be reborn. Grievance can't buy perfection. Only through thorough venting can resentment and anger disappear. Secondly, if you really want to go back to the past, you should know what kind of responsibility you have in each other's betrayal. What did you do wrong to alienate TA? Remember, once you decide to forgive each other, you are equal. Don't ask why, just think clearly: Do you really want love, or do you want guilt and compensation from the other person? If it is the latter, then I advise you to leave. Some people's understanding of love is just being loved, while others' understanding of love is just tangled.
Q: What should I do if I feel unsafe in an intimate relationship?
A: This is the most talked about topic in love relationship. When two people are together, one of them will be lost and can't stand each other's alienation. In fact, the loss of security comes from the lack of feelings from family. Birth is a commonplace topic. Attribution and resentment are not the purpose, the purpose is to see and understand, understand what is missing in your growth, and let yourself consciously repair it in your growth. Learn to be the parents of your inner child and master your own destiny, so you won't pin all your desires on your lover.
Q: Are other relationships, such as long-distance love, forgotten love, extramarital love, teacher-student love and homosexuality, reliable?
A: One of the characteristics of love is that it is aimed at aggregation, and the other is that it cannot be shared. So true love must be together, with each other as the only one. There can be other forms before, but the purpose must be towards this result. It's not the distance. The problem is that if distance can't be eliminated, long-distance love will eventually be eliminated by distance. It's not about age. The problem is that if we can't cross the generation gap, our hearts will depend on each other, but we can only get what we need. Responsibility is not the problem. The problem is that if you can't take responsibility and go out, the ultimate purpose of extramarital affairs is to avoid dissatisfaction in marriage.
So are other relationships that are considered unrealistic, neither fish nor fowl, or even taboo. If you can't respect your feelings, hold a pious and firm heart, and pay for it, but only rely on addiction, then the essence of so-called love is a disease, which is caused by an abnormal person or a normal person's abnormal mentality.
10 q: what should lovers do in the face of external obstacles?
A: If you know what you want, you won't care what the outside world says. If you are firm in your true love, you will have the confidence to clear the obstacles. If you can bear it, you will also use the most appropriate way to dispel the concerns of your loved ones. Unless you don't know, are not firm, and have no ability to take responsibility for love.
1Q: How can love last forever?
A: Love yourself first, then love others. You can't stop asking for yourself, but you can't stop giving to your lover. Love is when two healthy and cheerful people grow up together. It's not that two people who lack love pursue perfection for each other, but that a lover wakes up every day to watch the colorful world together. This is a wonderful life. That's my summary, which runs through my understanding of love. Of course, an article is not enough to sum up everyone's confusion, but these are the general directions and categories I can think of. If there are more specific situations that need more specific analysis and more subtle problems that need to be handled more carefully, I am always ready to wait for you here.
12 Q. Is there true love in the world?
A: Yes. As long as you match. You can see different scenery at different heights. If you see all kinds of realities and desires, all kinds of incompleteness and madness, it means that you are at the low end. You don't have to criticize the environment, let alone cater to others to change yourself. You just throw yourself high. If you can't resist inertia and compromise, it means that you are a vulgar majority. True love is as precious as a dream, because it won't casually come to people who are not worth it.