What is a marriage without communication?

A marriage without communication is a so-called "silent marriage". As the name implies, there is a serious lack of communication between husband and wife, which leads to nothing to say. This phenomenon is also called "marriage aphasia sign" or "husband and wife communication coma sign". If "silent marriage" is regarded as a kind of "marital disease", then we must first understand the "cause". Shu Xin, director of China Marriage and Family Counseling Service Research Center, believes that the "cause" of "wordless marriage" is more complicated. It can be said that different "silent marriages" have their own reasons. But in general, there are six reasons: as the two sides spend more and more time together, one side gradually ignores the emotional needs of the other side, ignores the psychological respect and concern for the spouse, and lacks emotional communication with the other side, resulting in one side's psychological needs being unsatisfied. This situation accounts for 3 1% in Marriage without Words. Ms. Lin and her husband have been married for 8 years. She was full of romantic fantasies about marriage, but she ran into a wall in reality. She said: "Every Valentine's Day, I want my husband to send me flowers, but he always says it is unnecessary and never invites me out to dinner. Over time, there are fewer and fewer words between us. " The disappointed party takes it for granted that the other party should understand something or change some behaviors after marriage, only to find that the other party has not made any efforts to change some behaviors. After disappointment, I was too lazy to talk. Before marriage, one party expected too much from the other party, or one party made a promise to the other party, such as "I won't smoke after marriage" and "I will try to make money after marriage", which failed to be fulfilled after marriage, making these promises broken like a bubble and completely disappointing the other party. This type accounts for 28% of the total. After the conflict marriage, the two sides no longer pretend, and all the shortcomings before marriage are exposed. After all, getting along with each other day and night, one party can't stand it, so it responds with silence. This situation accounts for about 20%. Ms. Fang is a strong wife and likes to show her leading position in the family by nagging, so the introverted husband chooses silence to keep their distance. After investigating 5000 couples in two years, Hazan, a plain professor at Cornell University in the United States, came to the conclusion that "the shelf life of love is only 30 months". Once the novelty of love has passed, the dull life will spark. Once family life lacks fun, husband and wife have nothing in common and don't know what to say together. This type accounts for about 10%. Stress type is because of the change of living conditions or the increase of work pressure, but the other party fails to understand and complain to the other party in time, and the two sides become silent from then on. The proportion of this reason is 8%. After the misunderstanding happened, one party was too lazy to explain, which led to a deeper misunderstanding and a long-term "cold war." This situation accounts for 8%. In a word, many families in China lack "family emotional control". In the face of negative emotions, people are often at a loss. They keep silent when they are unhappy, but once the other person feels the silence of the other person, they begin to worry, speculate and doubt, and finally the family relationship is in a mess, leading to more serious "silence." What is a marriage without communication? Marriage without communication is very tiring. 1. Don't say anything that hurts the feelings of both sides when quarreling. The most taboo for couples to quarrel is to criticize each other's shortcomings, especially some topics that hurt their feelings. No matter how angry you are, you can't open each other's scars, let alone sprinkle salt on them. Bringing up the past, bringing up the past, will often spoil the fun and seriously hurt the feelings between husband and wife. Husband and wife try to avoid mentioning these topics and discuss with each other the countermeasures to solve the problem. As long as both husband and wife can do this, the flame of quarrel will naturally go out. 2, the wife should not lick the chicken belly. Some women always hate it after quarreling with their husbands, and always blame each other. Husband's silence always endures your scolding. He went back when he was bored by you, and the husband and wife quarreled again. Women have such bad habits. Now that the quarrel is over, let's end this scolding war and stop clinging to each other's pain. 3, exert the gentleness of women to influence the quarrel between husband and wife, and no one will let anyone. If it comes to this, we will make appropriate concessions. After all, men love face. At this time, women can deal with it coldly and don't mess with him. Wait for the other person to calm down and say something gentle and considerate. At this time, he will be more receptive to your opinion, and it will be easier for you to make up. 4. Think from each other's standpoint. When couples have an argument, they need to calm down and look at the problem from each other's point of view. Maybe you can understand why your husband has always insisted on his own opinion, and you can also look at this problem more comprehensively. After marriage, you need to take on more responsibilities and look at problems more rationally and maturely. If you really misunderstand each other, or do something wrong, you should apologize to each other generously, show your position and attitude, and avoid an unnecessary scolding war. Occasionally quarreling between husband and wife is actually a little fun, but quarreling too often or too much will easily lead to marriage crisis. Husband and wife try to avoid quarreling when encountering problems and communicate with each other in a negotiated tone. Only in this way can the relationship between husband and wife get better and better. What is a marriage without communication? Can marriage continue without communication? It's hard. There must be deep communication in marriage. You can choose a time, make an appointment with your partner, abandon what you are doing, stay away from your mobile phone and choose a warm night. At home, the lights don't need to be too bright, it's better to be dim. Create a romantic atmosphere, give her enough sense of security, and let you two have an open talk to see how to go on better. How long can a marriage without communication last? If it doesn't change, it will be difficult to last long. If you don't love, don't just maintain it. It's not bad to leave early and find another kind of happiness. Marriages without love are mostly tragic ~ Don't make a decision against your will because of interests or something ~ Don't rush for success because you are not young ~ Otherwise, you can cry when you regret it. In love and marriage, when you don't get along well, there is no need to force yourself. It will only be very tiring to continue. How to communicate effectively with my husband 1, calmly? Don't ask questions in a panic, don't yell hysterically, and communicate calmly, so that the other party will be willing to talk to you and won't escalate into a quarrel. 2. Respect each other. Respect each other to gain their respect. That's what people do. If you treat each other better, they won't treat you badly. You know, people's hearts are all flesh, but they will still be more heart-warming. 3, talk about things, don't take it out on others. Many times, it may be that husband and wife just have different views on some things. Don't let this matter vent on the parties themselves, otherwise we will not be able to communicate, and may even lead to war at home. 4. Honesty. Frank and sincere communication is the principle of communication between husband and wife. If your husband can't do it, you might as well be honest and infect each other first. 5. Avoid old people and children. When communicating with your husband, you should avoid being in front of the elderly and children, so as not to really have differences. When quarreling, it will affect the elderly and children and make them worry and fear. Should a marriage without communication be divorced? If you really can't communicate, you can consider divorce. The most important thing for two people to be together is communication. After all, they are all people who want to live together for life. If two people are together, there is no topic, except some words about children, they say nothing, and sometimes they are indifferent to each other. Then there is no need for such a marriage to continue, and the two can completely pursue the life they want.