Zen, summer is coming and roses are in bloom.
Walking in the street full of flowers, I entangled Gu's arm and asked, "Ye, do you love me?"
"love."
"How much love?"
"I like it very much."
"Love is love?"
His eyes were far away and there was a moment of sadness.
Reached out and touched my head. silence is golden.
I always bother to pester him to ask these boring questions, and he is always silent about the last question.
So, I never knew how much he loved.
He is the lead singer of an unknown band in this city.
The first time I met him was in the square of the town.
He is singing Jay Chou's Blue and White Porcelain.
The sky is blue, waiting for misty rain, I am waiting for you. Smoke billowed from the kitchen stove, and the ending was dizzying.
Nice voice, nice words, I suddenly fell into his misty eyes.
In this small city, there are such amazing people!
There are beautiful women in the south, who are peerless and independent. A smile pours people into the city, and another smile pours people into the country.
But it collapsed at first sight.
two
He sings in the square occasionally, and more often, he sings in the bar.
Wherever I sing, I am the most enthusiastic audience.
So many people make noise in the bar, so many people go, and it is exposed.
Oh, by the way, I am a teacher, and I am responsible for preaching and teaching.
I don't know who sued the headmaster, saying that I go to bars every day and hang out with gangsters, which will lead to bad students sooner or later.
The headmaster talked to me seriously and told me to lead an honest and clean life and cherish my work.
If I don't steal or rob, why not lead an honest and clean life?
I nodded in the principal's office and said I would pay attention. After leaving school, you should still do what you want to do.
Ye Nan's karaoke bars are very famous in a small town, and students often sneak over to play.
As soon as they met, they stared at each other and called the teacher hello, which attracted much attention.
In the long run, all the teachers and students know that I am in love with the bar singer Gu.
The headmaster warned again: "Su Qiang, you don't want to work?"
My eyes were hot and I asked, "Who stipulates that teachers can't fall in love?"
The headmaster choked up.
"Three hundred and sixty lines, each line is the best. What's wrong with me falling in love with a singer!"
"There's nothing wrong with falling in love, but it's wrong for you to make such a high-profile publicity."
"Good, good, good, then I'll keep a low profile."
The headmaster is an antique and won't play hardball. I decisively lowered my posture.
"With your strength, you could have been rated as an excellent teacher this year. However, your current evaluation is not good. I think this matter will be put on hold. " The headmaster began to intimidate and seduce.
Women in love always have brains. Not to mention being an excellent teacher, she just gave me the position of principal. My choice will only be gu.
There are many stories in the town, full of joy and joy.
In this way, while attending the class, I fell in love with Gu.
Yuanyang is swimming in the shallow pond, and the red skirt is covered with green flowers. Every day, it seems that flowers can bloom.
three
I have always felt that such a small town will not keep Gu.
I didn't think about it, but my faint worry turned out to be true.
Signing a better entertainment company and developing in a bigger city is their only way.
I should finally be happy for them.
The night before they left, they sang in the town square again.
In the square with the elderly and children as the main audience, Gu sang "Border 1999".
"After parting, how to face the lonely Millennium, every day is engraved with heavy thoughts.
Say goodbye, one last glimpse in this dreamland, and waking up makes me split and split. "
It was noisy around, and the crying of children and the conversation of the old man drowned out waves after waves. I will definitely look at the singer on the stage, and tears will unconsciously paste my face.
"Maybe sleep in a nightmare, maybe miss the joy of tomorrow.
Maybe the sunshine abandoned this cold forest, just like my night without you. "
From now on, the night without you is mine.
The next day, I didn't see them off.
I'm afraid I'll burst into tears, and I'm even more afraid I'll go with him regardless.
Isn't it your dream to ride a horse and fight the sword and travel all over the world?
I can't.
I'm not Gu Yenan. I can wander around with my guitar on my back.
I'm Su Qiang. I have to take care of my old and sick mother and earn money to support my family and treat diseases.
Anyone's youth can be used to squander, but mine can't.
I know, that's why I'm so obsessed with Gu.
He did, but I didn't.
four
After parting, how to face the lonely Millennium, every day, is engraved with heavy thoughts.
Gu's words became a good prediction.
Passing through the square of the town every day, I lingered for a long time and didn't want to leave.
Missing is the pain of breathing, humming one's favorite songs, reading one's own letters, and even the pain of silence.
It hurts, but I'm used to it.
Work hard in class every day, substitute classes, make up lessons, and work hard to make money.
Except for the money for mother's meals and medical treatment, everything else was spent on the train.
Flying is too expensive, so I have to take the train for more than ten minutes every week to see Gu.
Gu is very busy.
Various performances, singing every night.
Many times, in my dusty past, I could only stand under the stage and watch one of his performances, and then I had to come back by train.
Late at night, I came by train, as if to meet you, fall in love, and then leave.
You tore down the wall and let me wander, but I can only stay where I am and tie myself up.
I'm tired, but I'm happy.
I don't want to think about where tomorrow is. As long as there is you, it is heaven.
Gu is becoming more and more unruly, and will show his love to me on the stage at a moment of great attention.
The breeze is long and the trees are blooming!
As long as he loves me, it doesn't matter if he is thousands of miles away. As long as he loves me, it doesn't matter if Wan Li trudges.
Whose youth is not full of love and water?
Grass with seeds,
The wind shook the leaves,
I, looking at you like this, is already beautiful!
five
Not afraid of suffering, not afraid of being tired, I am afraid that my mother will get sick.
Her health is getting worse. Every time it's very dizzy, I'm bedridden, and the doctor can't find out the reason.
I took off my clothes to take care of her, and I couldn't go anywhere.
Mom always asks when she is in a good mood, "Xiaoqiang, are you still dating that singer?"
I nodded with sadness on my face.
I don't know if it's a date if I don't see it once every six months.
It's just that I really miss it If you can't see it, you forget it.
"So long, he hasn't come back to see you, xiao qiang. In his mind, you are probably not as good as his career. I'm worried. I want to see you get married and have children. Only when you are complete can I feel at ease! "
What is true love like? I am very busy, but I will always make time for you.
I understand, but for me, love is not flesh and blood, not a vegetable, but an irresistible desire.
I can't stop loving him.
"Mom, don't think too much. Take care of yourself. I will take good care of myself. "
"Xiao Qiang, you are very stubborn. Even if you hit the south wall, you won't look back. What can you do? " Mother looks very sad.
"Children have their own children's lives, and you will be worried." I tucked her in and left the room.
The cold moon hangs high, outside the window, the night is as cold as ice.
I sat in silence all night wrapped in clothes.
I have been waiting, waiting, even if I come back once.
But he never came back once.
Love words are only occasional lies.
Very much. Very much. how much is it?
The deeper the love, the weaker it is.
The next day, I invited a kind person to take care of my mother and got on the train to B city.
Gu, since you won't come to me, let me come to you.
six
A full face of wind and frost, after half a year, finally came here again.
I stood at the door of his dormitory, afraid to knock.
Or his teammate Acheng, opened the door and saw me.
I gave him a brilliant smile. "Where's Gu Yenan?"
He didn't smile back, he didn't answer, he struggled in pain.
"Where's Gu Yenan?" I asked again.
He took a deep breath and finally said, "He doesn't live here anymore?"
"So, where does he live?"
"Xiao Qiang, Brother Ye, he ... don't come later anyway."
Actually speak hesitatingly, awkward.
"Why don't I come? Where is he? " I raised my tone.
"Elder brother, he is with others. That woman is rich. She will help us make a record and praise us. You know, it's useless to sing well now without packaging and promotion, do you understand? "
He has been yelling loudly.
I just felt that the cold wind blew through the inner room, flying like a dragon and dancing like a phoenix, and all my internal organs were chopped, and I fell to the ground, bleeding profusely, and I couldn't bear to look straight.
Love, love, how much is it?
Love words are only occasional lies and have no value in reality.
I stumbled out, stretched out my hand and stopped the car, and went straight to the station.
It is normal for him to be so surprised, absolutely gorgeous and liked.
It's a pity that he is too handsome to be liked.
Now that someone is finally willing to hug him, it is foolish for him not to catch him.
I don't blame him, not at all.
People like him will never belong to the ordinary and never belong to the small town.
Perhaps, I have vaguely known that there will be such a day, so I am so entangled in knowing how much love he said.
The reality is finally in front of us, fragmented and scarred.
seven
From then on, he took his sunny road, and I took my wooden bridge, the ends of the earth, poor and down, and irrelevant.
Mother's illness, sometimes good and sometimes bad, I take care of her while attending classes, while wandering in various cities, seeking medical advice.
God bless, finally found the root of the disease.
I borrowed money everywhere to operate on my mother, and when she finished the operation, she recovered and was discharged from the hospital.
It's been three years.
I quit my school job and went to B city.
Not to look for Gu, but to make money.
When can my mother pay back the meager salary she earned as a teacher?
In big cities, there are always more opportunities to make money.
My mother burst into tears when I left home. "Xiaoqiang, my mother dragged you down."
"Mom, wait for me at home, and I'll let you enjoy it." I smiled and said goodbye to him.
If I am not strong, who can I show weakness to?
Anyway, as long as you are here, the sun is shining.
Working during the day, working part-time at night, white clouds and pale dogs, things change.
In my life, besides making money, I still make money.
I don't miss Gu Yenan.
Just, what about missing?
Life has been riddled with holes, and I'm not who I used to be.
Love is hidden in my heart, I refuse to touch it easily.
Did he cause a sensation?
I don't know.
I've been in B city for so long, and I haven't heard from him.
The two of us, in the final analysis, are people who have no fate.
eight
The work has gradually improved, and it has gradually gained the appreciation of the leaders. At the end of the year, he was also rated as an excellent employee and received two concert tickets.
I went to the concert with my friends.
Standing under the stage, watching their passionate performances on the stage, my thoughts just broke out, surging and overwhelming.
I thought I would forget him, I thought I almost forgot him, but when the familiar piano sound sounded, my mind was full of his shadow.
How strong you have to be to never forget!
I left the crowd and ran to the bathroom backstage, letting tears gush out.
Just let the tears flow, and then I won't miss it.
I walked out of the bathroom with red eyes and saw a familiar figure.
I took two steps forward and caught him. It's A Cheng.
"You, why are you here?" We were all surprised and said with one voice.
"I came to see the concert. What about you? Is there a performance? "
He sighed, "I haven't been on stage for a long time, and now I'm behind the scenes."
oh ...
"So, what about Gu Yenan?"
I struggled for thousands of times and finally opened my lips gently, as if the clouds were light and the wind was light.
"Elder brother, he went to the north, I haven't seen him for a long time. Since he left, the band has broken up and he still wants to travel. However, I think it's too far from home, and I'm old, so I come out. In this line of work, it is easy to be killed by the waves on the beach! " Acheng is very sighing.
I was silent for a long time, but I was speechless.
"Gu Yenan, didn't you end up with that woman?"
"The elder sister paid for a record for us, but it didn't sell well and didn't become popular. Later, when the big sister failed to invest, she left us alone. "
At this point, his phone rang.
He took a look and said apologetically, "Xiaoqiang, we'll contact you then." I have something to do now, so I have to go first. "
Say and waved at me, picked up the phone and trotted away.
I froze in the original, and my heart was desolate.
I've always wanted to know your recent situation, and finally I know it, but that's it, still dreaming? Still looking for answers?
At the weekend, I searched all the video stores and bookstores and finally found the record that Acheng said.
In the humble corner, the side face of his photo is still so amazing.
Suddenly, it made my eyes shine.
I bought it, locked it in a drawer, locked it together, that time.
Cicadas sing, summer comes and roses bloom.
During that time, I deeply loved your time.
Text/Lou Yu is drunk
Life is first seen, fragrance is faint, believe in beauty, and write love.
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