I broke up with my ex-girlfriend

Are you wrong? You can say that's right, because you have the right to pursue your love in all the ways you can. It may also be wrong, because you may confuse love and sex. Right or wrong is not important, what is important is that we need to explore ourselves. There is a basic assumption in psychotherapy: when we get to know ourselves better, we will make decisions that are more in line with our true selves, including "What should I do next?" The answer. You confessed your intentions, seduced him with sex, and wanted to get back together, which made me feel your courage. It also makes me feel that you seem to love a little "humble", which also makes the other party feel a little "guilty". You can't keep the other person's heart, maybe you mistakenly think that the other person will love because of sex. You sigh that "feelings are so complicated" is also an attempt to simplify love into a sexual problem, thinking that the other person is thinking about you because he can't let go of your body. Although love is based on sexual attraction, there is an essential difference between sex and love. When we meet for the first time, we will automatically say whether we have feelings for each other. Even if it's just a glimpse, our bodies will tell us very faithfully whether our hair stands on end, whether our pupils are dilated, whether our heart beats faster, whether our steps slow down, and so on. This feeling is actually "sexual attraction", which makes us feel the passionate part of the body. It is because of this feeling that we are willing to try whether to fall in love with each other. The desire for sex makes us go out to find someone who can burn our passion, but after falling in love with someone, we begin to be single-minded, obsessed, share our passion with each other and form romantic feelings. Falling in love with someone, or infatuating with someone, is usually because we want to distinguish this person from others and make everything in Ta look so different. What's even more amazing is that we usually fall in love with someone in an "uncontrollable" state and always fall in love with someone carelessly. This is carelessness. From a psychological point of view, this uncontrollable force comes from the subconscious. After a long time, the passion will fade away. Love is no longer "romantic", but it can develop "dependence". Both parties in love will have a good impression and rely on each other gently. Long-term and stable love does not mean the lack of sexual desire. Some people will still have sexual desire for others, some people will still have romantic moments with others, but some people will sublimate their sexual desire. There is not only sex and passion in complete love, but also romance and dependence. I love you, it doesn't mean I only have sexual desire for you, just like I have sex with you, it doesn't mean I love you. When you meet love and you, you sigh that "feelings are so complicated", which also makes people feel distressed, because you are sad and helpless. Some people say that love is like two people pulling a rubber band. The other man stopped loving and let go. The injured person is the one who never lets go. I think you are really tired. In order to keep your love, you have done everything you can, even ignoring your injured self. However, if you fall in love with someone, do you have to be black and blue all over yourself, or the more you hurt, the deeper you love? First of all, we like a kind of people, not a specific person, so there is no need to panic. If we lose the person in front of us, we will never find it again. Secondly, you can find someone who loves you and loves you at the same time. You don't have to think it's a luxury, you just have to believe it. Finally, from the perspective of deep psychology, if you are loved enough in the early interaction with your parents, you will be copied into your love, and vice versa. Therefore, to identify whether a relationship is positive and healthy depends on whether both parties in love love themselves more than before. If not, then we need to deal with the psychological trauma in our early years and learn to love ourselves first. Therefore, I really want to advise you: let go, you need to take care of yourself first. But at the same time, there is also a voice telling me that maybe what you need now is "entanglement", although you are also blaming yourself and wondering if you are wrong. In consultation, when I have a similar visit, I usually say, "You need to struggle, because you love so strongly, as if without him, life will lose its color and meaning. It is better to die and stay a little longer." Often when I say this, many visitors will say, "no, actually, he may not be that important, but I can't let go now." Here, we can see that the visit exaggerates the importance of each other in our imagination, and we will suddenly realize that we just can't let go now, which means we should let go when it's time to let go. Allowing yourself to struggle and make mistakes is actually fully respecting your feelings, but you also need to set a limit for yourself. When the consequences are unbearable, you have to let yourself quit. When we meet love, we meet beauty and passion, which stimulates our inner vitality and creativity. However, we should also know that roses have thorns. Once they are stabbed, they will bury the wounds that did not heal in the early years, which is likely to bring pain that affects bones and muscles and involves internal organs. Of course, everything has two sides, and the re-exposure of the unhealed wounds in the early years also gives us an excellent opportunity to deal with the wounds, pick out the abscesses and reduce inflammation and bandage them. Therefore, when you meet love, you meet a potentially more important self. Even if you are tired and tangled now, you will see a new world after walking through this hurdle. You deserve it. Write it at the end. If you are confused and want to talk to someone, you can find a consultant or leave a message under the article. We will regularly select some messages and invite consultants to answer them. We will protect your privacy and hide your personal information. Please rest assured. I hope you can find the light here in the loneliest moment. The world and I love you. After breaking up, I still envy my ex-girlfriend's figure. 2. The man still loves you after breaking up. 10 is the first performance and will contact you actively. If a man contacts you every day even if he says he won't chase you, and asks you out for various reasons, it means that he hasn't given up yet. Second, I will care about you and take care of you. If he still cares about you silently at ordinary times, for example, see if you have an umbrella, eat, or often find reasons to send you meals. He will help you immediately when you need help, which shows that he still cares about you. Third, keep your distance from other girls. If you find that after he gave up on you, he still deliberately kept his distance from the girls around him, distanced himself from other girls in front of you, and was attentive to you from time to time, it shows that he still has you in his heart. Fourth, I am willing to pay money and time for you. When you need him, as long as you ask, he will come and never refuse to say that he is busy. I will still give you a gift and invite you out for dinner on holidays, and I am willing to spend money for you. This shows that he loves you. Fifth, emotions are easy to change. If you find that he is always unhappy from time to time, it is probably because one of your actions or words has affected him, and your every move will affect him. Sixth, it is easy to be jealous. Men's love is a bit overbearing, and men will be as overbearing as children after being tempted. So once you find out that he will be angry because other men are close to you, and sometimes he will even unreasonably prevent you from getting too close to other men. Don't be angry. That is a sign that he cares about you. Seventh, I will stand up for you. When you are wronged and others speak ill of you, he can't help coming out to defend you. This is all a sign of loving you. Eighth, I am willing to pay for you without asking for anything in return. When a man falls in love with you, he will willingly give everything for you without asking for anything in return. A man who loves you deeply will be willing to give everything and do anything for you. The man who loves you deeply would rather let himself be wronged than let you suffer any harm. Therefore, once you meet such a man, don't take it for granted, but know how to cherish him. Ninth, he will often go to the "old place" with memories of each other. Even if this relationship is over and they are clean, the man who is still attached to you will definitely go to the other person's "old place" and try to find your voice and shadow. In fact, the reason why men do this is not because they can't let you go. At least he once loved you deeply. However, a man who is too persistent can't live without her? Don't indulge in past memories! Tenth, it will change because of you, and it will get better! The true meaning of love is to change each other. For you, a man is willing to change, become what you like, and then spend the rest of his life with you. In fact, a man who loves you may have a series of bad habits before, but when you don't like it, men are trying to change it. It is still too difficult to become the person you like right away, so you should give a man enough time, at least for you, he will have the idea of changing. Love can't be hidden, even if he says he doesn't care about you on the surface, his usual performance can't be hidden, so if you want to know if he really gives up on you from time to time, see if he still loves you. After breaking up, I still covet my ex-girlfriend's body. Do men still love you after breaking up? One: I haven't hacked all your contact information. After breaking up, men still love you and will leave room for themselves. Even though he was decisive when we broke up, he still couldn't bear to lose your news. You occupy an important position in his mind. Maybe he has little interaction with you, but he will still pay attention to every bit of your life. If after breaking up, he still has your WeChat, can't remember your phone number, and even he will answer when you contact him, then he must not forget you. As long as a man loves deeply, it is actually hard to forget. For men, there is a clear difference between love and play. Loved people will not forget even if they are hacked, but if they are women who have played, they will not think of them without contact. Two: the habits related to you have not changed. No matter how long two people are together, they will form similar habits. Maybe they are used to using your password to unlock their mobile phone, or they must say good night before going to bed every day, or she will help you get dressed every time before going out. These little habits that are integrated into life gradually make him unable to give up on you completely. In fact, if a person really wants to change a habit, 2 1 day is enough, but he has never changed. This can only be that he is subjectively unwilling to change and not willing to let you disappear completely from his life. Moreover, only after the real separation will men realize that what is more terrible than being upset is the result of habit. So, if he really still loves you, you can pay attention to him with your heart, and you will definitely find those little habits that he doesn't want to get rid of, and you have your shadow. We have shared many specific methods in the article of WeChat official account at the end of the article! Three: secretly pay attention to you. Your friend told you that he asked about you again today. You have a good life, and he is happy for you, because you are out of the hurt of this relationship and feel sad at the same time, because you don't need him at all. He's more worried because you're not doing well. He thinks it's all because of him. He even wants to walk up to you and give you a hug, just like when you were sad before. His mood is still influenced by you, and he is still suffering emotionally, but that's because he hasn't let go. If he really doesn't have you in his heart, you are like a stranger who is not as good as a friend. He won't care about you and won't bother to ask you. He has no love or hate for you, only indifference. Four: Help you when you are in trouble. Some people say that we can still be friends after breaking up. If you ask me, one of the two people who can still be friends after breaking up must not let go and must want to go back to the past. If a man can still help you when you are in trouble after breaking up, then he must still love you. After breaking up, he can help you without hesitation. Don't believe that he is just out of friendship, he must still love you in his heart. Five: You mentioned the past, but he didn't shy away. When you mention your past, if he recalls with you, or even takes the initiative to recall, then he must still love you, because his purpose is not only to stir up feelings with you, but to really arouse the deepest thoughts. Two people always have a good past, and when he does this, his heart has actually begun to flood. All the above standards indicate that the other party has not completely let go, of course, there are other signs that will be shown! Everyone's situation is different, so be flexible and don't copy it mechanically!