This sentence is generally used to urge the mother-in-law who excessively interferes with the marriage of her son and daughter-in-law. However, if the mother-in-law is kind enough to persuade, the son and daughter-in-law should also distinguish between right and wrong and not live up to her kindness.
Xu Jie became a grandmother at the age of 52, which should have been a happy thing, but she was unhappy all day. The reason is that Xu Jie feels that she has done a thankless thing and is unhappy.
Her son and daughter-in-law were introduced by friends. When they are in love, the daughter-in-law often goes to Xu Jie's house to play. She also liked this girl, including when her son got married, Xu Jie thought they were busy with work and simply lived together. She can also help them cook.
But the only requirement for the daughter-in-law at that time was that she could not live with her in-laws. Sister Xu and her wife took out their savings for most of their lives to buy a wedding room for their son and daughter-in-law, and then the daughter-in-law also said that it was inconvenient to commute and needed a car.
Sister Xu didn't want to buy it at that time. She wants her son to buy a car of his own. She said she would get everything ready for her parents, so that the children wouldn't have any pressure. As a result, the daughter-in-law means that she will rely on her son to provide for the elderly in the future, and she should relieve some pressure on her son in advance when buying a car.
Sister Xu said that her daughter-in-law made things so realistic that they couldn't get out when they were angry. Her son also said that if the two families were unhappy because of a car, he would lose face.
The old couple had only one son and worked hard for him all their lives. It costs a lot of money to buy a house. If they don't give money to buy a car, all their previous efforts will be in vain.
Under the pressure of her son and daughter-in-law, Xu Jie had to take out the money for buying a car, including the bride price, and they sent it to the woman's parents.
When her son got married, Sister Xu thought that her son could not live with her after marriage. She was very sad. A person secretly wiped her tears, and her wife saw her sad. On the night of her son's wedding, she told them to stay at home for a few more days before moving to a new house. Originally, my son agreed, but the next day, my son said that my daughter-in-law was not used to living with her in-laws and moved out as soon as possible.
Xu Jie understands that his son is so natural that he can't be changed in a word or two. She didn't dwell on this matter, just thinking about marrying a daughter-in-law for her son, and their obligations would be over. The old couple will live for themselves in the future.
However, when the daughter-in-law was in confinement, Xu Jie took the initiative to take care of it. At first, they got along well. After all, they have never lived together, and there is no big contradiction between them. The car where the daughter-in-law lives is also bought by her in-laws. If she is not sensible, it is not difficult for her mother-in-law to wait for the next month.
However, Sister Xu found that when the daughter-in-law was confined to the moon, she washed her hair every two days. Sister Xu advised her not to wash her hair like that out of consideration for her daughter-in-law's health, but her daughter-in-law not only refused to listen, but also complained that her mother-in-law interfered in her life.
Xu Jie was wronged, obviously with good intentions, but she was complained by her daughter-in-law When there was a gap between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, her son intervened, but she always defended her wife and criticized Xu Jie as a mother.
The son said to Sister Xu, "Mom, your mother-in-law interferes too much. We have our own way of life. You just have to do your own thing and don't care about anything else. " After listening to her son's reproach, Xu Jie was surprised.
She said, "My daughter-in-law washes her hair every two days and advises her not to listen. My son's words stunned me on the spot. I am really kind, considering my daughter-in-law's health. If they don't understand, they will blame me for meddling. My son is more indiscriminate. He only knows how to protect his daughter-in-law and oppose my mother. I have never seen such ungrateful children as them. "
In fact, the root of many things is not the mother-in-law problem, but mainly the son's problem. Now some men think that protecting their wives in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is a good husband, but at the same time they have lost their conscience as sons.
As far as Sister Xu's situation is concerned, in the concept of their older generation, it is understandable that washing your hair in the second month is easy to catch cold and will do harm to your daughter-in-law's health. After all, the old people all come over like that. They just care, and there is no malice.
But in fact, as long as you wash your hair correctly and don't catch a cold, there is no problem. Maybe her mother-in-law has some misunderstandings, but we can't deny that her intentions are good.
Usually, when we say that a mother-in-law interferes with her daughter-in-law's life, she usually tells her daughter-in-law what to do, and even buys clothes or other things, she has to take care of it. She simply guided her son's marriage as her own.
However, there is nothing wrong with mother-in-law Xu Jie. From helping her son get married, she paid a lot of money, and then she took care of the month. From the standpoint of her son, she should thank her mother for her contribution.
But in order to prove that he is a good husband, her son completely ignores the feelings of his old mother, blindly favors his wife and accuses his mother. I may feel that I married a good man from the standpoint of my daughter-in-law, but there is a big problem when it comes to this man's character.
It's okay to hurt your wife, but you must be clear about right and wrong. Even if there is something wrong with your mother's practice, you should be calm and communicate well, instead of being strong enough to protect one party and hurt the other. Such a man is not a good person.
Of course, mother-in-law and daughter-in-law get along and do whatever they want. If the other party doesn't listen to advice, don't interfere too much, otherwise it's her own fault.
People respect each other, but families also care about each other, and so do mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. It may be common in life that mother-in-law loves to make trouble and doesn't let her daughter-in-law feel better, but it can't be ignored that some daughter-in-law is also difficult to talk and has no tolerance for her mother-in-law.
Not to mention whether the various demands put forward by the daughter-in-law in the article are excessive at the time of marriage. As far as her confinement is concerned, there is nothing wrong with her mother-in-law. She just kindly reminds her that washing her hair too often is not good for her health. Daughter-in-law can not listen, but she should understand her mother-in-law's original intention and appreciate the care of the elderly.
A woman looks at a man's character not only by his attitude towards himself, but also by his attitude towards his parents. A really good man is an all-round good man who only cares about his wife and doesn't care about his parents. That is a deliberate performance, and there is still a hateful side hidden in his nature.