A: Beijing finally has a home. Nobody knows. I just bought a house in Beijing. . Community, this community is too big, people who come and go don't know, you said that living on one floor, distant relatives are not as good as close neighbors. In case something goes wrong, we should still help each other, right? I am a warm-hearted person.
Hello? No one. . . Is anybody there?
B: Who is it?
A: Me.
Oh, let's go. who is it? Who are you?
I'm new here. I'm your neighbor across the street. My name is Dacheng.
No, do you sell insurance?
Do I look like you?
B: I'm telling you, I bought auto insurance and personal insurance, but nothing. Let's go. quickly
Hey, I'm not in insurance. I really don't do insurance. Hey. . .
No, why are you so annoying? Why are you so angry?
No, I am.
B: Where are you going to kick the door?
A: No.
What's the matter with you?
Brother, do you recognize my accent? I'm from the northeast, I'm from the northeast.
Where are you from in Northeast China?
A: Northeast China. . Yes
B: Oh, big brother, fellow villager.
A: I'm right across from you.
Really? Are you here to buy a house?
I'm thinking of setting up a home here.
B: I'm telling you, come with me.
A: What's wrong?
B: Don't buy it here, just go. I'm-I'm moving. Well, people in this neighborhood are a little abnormal.
A: I don't think so.
B: I seem to have mental problems.
A: What about me?
Not you, not you. Let me tell you something.
you said
Last night, early last night. It's past two in the morning.
After two o'clock
B: Just shout when someone is in the neighborhood below.
A: What's the shout?
I don't know. I am sleeping. I'll just look at the window. He shouted, turning on all the windows and lights.
A: Then what?
When he shouted, the residents turned on all the lights. At last he said something that made me angry.
A: Huh?
B: Look who I belong to ... I can't find my home. He's so irritating.
A: Brother, to tell you the truth. I was a little drunk yesterday.
Was it you yesterday?
A: I, my wife is not at home. I, alas, want to say something new here. Our buildings, ABCD, bpmf, you also have many buildings …
B: I'm telling you, big brother, besides you, I found some people in our neighborhood these two days, which are abnormal, indeed abnormal. There is a Wang Xiaohu upstairs.
A: The thin one? There is a man named Wang Xiaohu, whom I know.
B: I bought two crabs from time to time yesterday. I bought a crab. I have no soy sauce at home. I thought, don't go out and buy it. All neighbors. I went upstairs to borrow some soy sauce. When he entered the room, he said, Hello, Brother Wang, you see there is no soy sauce at home, and there is no soy sauce for eating crabs. Please lend me your soy sauce. Guess what he said?
What did you say?/Sorry?
B: Well, what a coincidence! My family eats little crab with soy sauce. Let me send him crabs.
A: He doesn't count. How much is a catty of crab and soy sauce?
Who knows? You mean this guy?
A: It's several times worse.
So I regret buying this building.
A: After that, if you want to eat crabs, don't look for him. I have soy sauce at home, too. You can come to me. A distant relative is better than the opposite.
Yes, we are all good friends.
If you need anything, you can call me.
Does anything help?
No problem.
Do you live across the hall?
A: That door.
B: You, how big is your square meter?
I have 132.
B: 132
A: How about this one?
B: 72.
Ah, good.
Well, big brother, let me ask you something.
A: Huh? You don't eat crabs, do you?
No, my mother and them will come over in a few days. After that, you can lend me your house for two months ... OK, big brother?
The problem is definitely not, because my father-in-law also lives here. Can your mother come back after my father-in-law has left?
No, big brother.
Some other time I'll treat you to crab some other time.
Ok, come when you have time.
A: This guy is too hard. He wants to move directly to my house. I have to change this guy.
Who is it? Can't get out? Dude, what's wrong? Can't get out of the locked room? What's the matter? Hello?
What are you doing?
I heard a noise inside.
What are you doing here?
No, I'm looking here.
What are you doing?
A: Big Brother.
What are you doing here?
A: Big Brother, Big Brother, no.
C: I said
You may have misunderstood.
C: What the hell? What did I misunderstand about you? Why are you thirsty in my house?
A: I'll count to three. Let go of your hand.
three
seven
Brother, you let go, I'll pull it myself, you let go
What are you doing here?
Me, can you let me talk? I am a neighbor of the house next to yours. I just moved here. There is nothing wrong with my family. I'll see if there's anything wrong with your house. If there is any difficulty, I will help. You said you.
C: Pull it up
A: What do you think of this?
Captain: You see, I'm alone. Do I still need help now?
A: Then I don't have to help you.
C: Do I still need help?
A: Then I put my hand down.
C: It's up to me. I'm telling you, I'm home, Huang Shang.
I can see that.
I still need your help. My daughter-in-law listens to me. If I told her to go east, she wouldn't dare to go west. I am a tiger.
What about your wife? Tigress?
C: I, my daughter-in-law is Song Wu.
I am Song Wu's brother.
I'm telling you, I'm Huang Shang. Do you know what my wife is?
A: The Queen
C: Empress Dowager Cixi, right? Daughter-in-law?
What are you talking about? I said, why is it so difficult for you to make soy sauce?
C: I'm, I'm a neighbor, and we're here to chat.
What are you happy about? Are you happy? There is a happy and harmonious family here. Do you still come out to play? What on earth are you happy about?
No, I'm just chatting. I want to talk about some big business and earn you two dollars.
Just you? Are you still talking about big business? You didn't graduate from primary school. What big deal did you come out to talk about? How much do you only give me a month? Just give me 500 yuan, come out to talk about big business, and I have to support you! Kneel down.
What are you doing?
Gee, I take you as my wife.
cowardly
Are you a sister in law? Sister-in-law, I will advise you in a word, home and everything will be happy, don't make any noise.
Who are you?
A: I am who I am. I'm Cheng Zi. I am your neighbor. I just moved here. neighbor I want to go to your house to see if there is any difficulty. If you help me, I will chat with him. Answer if you are in trouble, and you and your wife will stop fighting, okay?
Are you here to help?
A: That's right.
I'm not here to help you fight.
D: wait a minute.
A: Your daughter-in-law has a big temper.
Sister-in-law, forget it. I don't want a gift. What is the gift?
You can help me throw these rubbish anywhere. Throw it to Wang Jinlong and go home. I also want to abandon you for him.
Answer: Brother, call me if you have any difficulties.
Yes, there are others.
A: How?
C: Go down and get me a bottle of soy sauce first. Thank you.
Wife and daughter-in-law
See how delicious the food around here is? Eating crabs every day is not afraid of local tyrants with high cholesterol.
I was really convinced by this family. What difficulties do I have? Hello?
E: Lang Lang, where are you hiding?
A: Hello?
Oh, my God, are you a thief?
A: No one? ouch
Who is it? Who kicked me?
Who are you?
I tell you, I am strong. I can't beat you. Do you know you?
I learned, sister. What do you do?
E: don't go forward. Are you going to harass me?
My sister, to be honest, I don't have the courage.
youngest elder sister
Are you a thief?
A: Do you think thieves have such big eyes and thin skin?
E: Don't move.
A: I'm not moving.
E: Don't touch me. You don't look like a nice guy.
A: I live near here.
You see, I still have a room card here, and the key card is attached to my mobile phone.
I come from this block.
E: You are from around here. Then what are you doing in my house?
A: I, I, you see, I am actually a good person. I went upstairs and downstairs to the end.
You are the only one who can help their family. I'll see if there are any difficulties and need to help them.
Oh, honey, my family is in trouble
What's your problem?
E: Give me a bottle of mineral water.
A: Little sister, can't you carry it?
E: That big barrel of mineral water, my body is so thin.
I can't do this kind of rough and dirty work
A: It may be light for you to take a barrel, but you only need six or seven barrels. In fact, these young ladies can help you, but I'm not from the supermarket downstairs.
E: Then you can help me move a bucket.
Ok, carry a bucket of water. That's no problem. No problem.
I'll move it for you right away.
E: My family hasn't knocked to help me for ten years.
A: Why?
E: It turns out that when I was thin, a few people knocked, but when I gained 200, no one knocked.
A: No one dares to come when you gain 50 pounds. Why are you still single?
I just stay at home alone every day.
A: Stay at home and you will be single for life.
You have nothing to do. Go out for a walk and find a partner.
E: I can't find it. I went shopping the other day and left. Suddenly a man followed me.
Wherever I go, he follows me. I thought he had a crush on me.
A: Really?
E: I went back to ask if you had a crush on me.
What did he say?
E: He said it was too windy in Anqing in winter, so I found a wall to shelter from the wind.
In fact, what he said was very hurtful.
E: I just want to find someone who can live with me forever.
A: No. Hair will fall out when you get old.
I can introduce you to one. What are your requirements?
E: I need a car to be handsome.
A: I tell you, sister, my mobile phone is very developed.
I can find anything for you on my mobile phone.
Einstein: OK.
A: You should be handsome, handsome and have a car. According to the internet, chess is very handsome and has a car. You are changing the environment. This doesn't suit you. You changed another one.
E: I just want to find a short dress.
Then I will exercise on the ice, so I like skating. Let him take me skating, skating.
A: Eh, this is similar to yours? Still have to wear a skirt? Slipped while you were still fine? Does this look like a penguin? Isn't that a short, slippery penguin in a skirt?
Are you sick? I want to find someone. I don't want penguins. Bah!
Actually, sister, you found a penguin very interesting. I'm just kidding you. Take your time.
What are you doing?
A: Fate is this thing.
E: Give me a bucket of mineral water.
A: Yes. .
It's cruel
F: Is it convenient for you to do me a favor?
Huh?
Didn't you say you wanted to find me a date?
If she finds it, she will come to my house and sit for a while.